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re: If you didn't have your wife (or don't have one) would you be happy being a loner?
Posted on 3/19/24 at 3:24 pm to Thundercles
Posted on 3/19/24 at 3:24 pm to Thundercles
I got divorced at 39. I spent a good amount of time wandering around mountains. I still wanted a partner in life. I really dont think we were meant to be alone. I think the problem is fifth wave feminism
1
Posted on 3/19/24 at 3:49 pm to Thundercles
quote:
I often wonder about men's capacity to be a lonely hermit if the situation were to arise. I could see myself ending up alone in the woods til the end if it went that way.
I see women bitching about men in their 40's "not wanting anything serious" but I truly get it. I feel like if you made it that long without choosing to settle down, it's possible you might want to go through the second half of life in the exact same manner.
Someone told me once in a moment of anger "you are going to die alone" and I said " we ALL die alone". We may have more or less people around us, but we all die, as we live, alone. Alone, with others.
Most men want the same thing; respect, emotional stability, consistent peace, kindness and sexual availability. It's a pretty simple formula. But if you can't find it, so what? You only have so many days left on earth, spend them happily. Hopefully with a woman, but if not still spend them happily. You don't owe anybody anything.
Posted on 3/19/24 at 3:53 pm to jamiegla1
quote:
I really dont think we were meant to be alone.
I think we were meant to live with a partners (spouse) and in community with others. I think that's where the vast majority will feel closer to fulfilled and purposeful.
Posted on 3/19/24 at 3:54 pm to Thundercles
No. I have gotten more social as I get older. I think part of that evolution is because of my wife and kids. Humans are social animals.
Posted on 3/19/24 at 3:56 pm to Thundercles
I travelled internationally for years by myself on business. Sometimes with other engineers but most of the time I was alone. I did not mind it a bit and told my wife I am fine being alone. Staying in hotels by myself, eating out by myself or seeing the sites by myself.
I worked a project from 2019 -2021 overseas and lived alone in a one-bedroom apartment. COVID kept me from going home for about a year. I was NOT happy. I guess I found out my limit being away from family and friends. People need people.
I worked a project from 2019 -2021 overseas and lived alone in a one-bedroom apartment. COVID kept me from going home for about a year. I was NOT happy. I guess I found out my limit being away from family and friends. People need people.
Posted on 3/19/24 at 3:57 pm to Tantal
My condolences. It’s a tough place to be. My wife died from a difficult terminal disease a couple of years ago when I was 51. Take care of her, your family and yourself. It will be bad, but you can get to the other side and rebuild. Whatever that looks like for you.
I’ve intentionally stayed away from dating since she died. I got 99 problems but a bitch ain’t one, as they say. Been taking care of my kids and myself. Like you I’m not interested in a woman who “needs” me. I’ve been through enough to solve some chick’s problems.
That said there are women out there who feel the same way about a man. In the future I’ll look for one that is additive to my life, and me additive to hers. I’m good on my own and she’ll need to be good on her own. If we can put it together in a 1+1=3 then it’s on.
I’ve intentionally stayed away from dating since she died. I got 99 problems but a bitch ain’t one, as they say. Been taking care of my kids and myself. Like you I’m not interested in a woman who “needs” me. I’ve been through enough to solve some chick’s problems.
That said there are women out there who feel the same way about a man. In the future I’ll look for one that is additive to my life, and me additive to hers. I’m good on my own and she’ll need to be good on her own. If we can put it together in a 1+1=3 then it’s on.
Posted on 3/19/24 at 3:59 pm to Thundercles
I would be good for about 5 days.
Then the dishes and laundry would stack up and I’d be completely lost.
Then the dishes and laundry would stack up and I’d be completely lost.
Posted on 3/19/24 at 4:04 pm to Thundercles
Im sitting here at in-patient hospice watching my unconscious wife breathe. It appears I will soon be single. I’ll soon be 67. I’m not antisocial at all, i just don’t seek out company any more. I’ve always enjoyed my solitude. I guess that’s a good thing now.
Posted on 3/19/24 at 4:12 pm to Pettifogger
quote:
I think we were meant to live with a partners (spouse) and in community with others. I think that's where the vast majority will feel closer to fulfilled and purposeful.
It appears since these traditional cultural and natural norms are being replaced with other "communities" the rates of depression and anxiety rise. I guess we cant just replace innate desires.
This post was edited on 3/19/24 at 4:13 pm
Posted on 3/19/24 at 4:14 pm to Thundercles
I am in late 60's single have 2 grown kids and 4 Grandbabies. I live alone and have for 20 years and am just fine. I live on a golf course (Craft Farms) and am 2 miles from the beach and 6 miles from the Flora-Bama. So yes you can be a loner and happy.
Posted on 3/19/24 at 4:22 pm to OBTIGER 1
quote:
I am in late 60's single have 2 grown kids and 4 Grandbabies. I live alone and have for 20 years and am just fine. I live on a golf course (Craft Farms) and am 2 miles from the beach and 6 miles from the Flora-Bama. So yes you can be a loner and happy.
not to be that guy, but you are about 12 miles from Flora Bama.
Posted on 3/19/24 at 4:29 pm to wallowinit
well apt username, considering the challenge ahead
Kudos to you Sir.. its an interesting point in life
I hope the very best
I just wiped the outer corner of my right eye for the first time in almost 4 years
Kudos to you Sir.. its an interesting point in life
I hope the very best
I just wiped the outer corner of my right eye for the first time in almost 4 years
This post was edited on 3/19/24 at 4:36 pm
Posted on 3/19/24 at 4:33 pm to wallowinit
quote:
Im sitting here at in-patient hospice watching my unconscious wife breathe. It appears I will soon be single. I’ll soon be 67. I’m not antisocial at all, i just don’t seek out company any more. I’ve always enjoyed my solitude. I guess that’s a good thing now.
saying a prayer for you & your wife this evening baw
Posted on 3/19/24 at 4:41 pm to Thundercles
I’d probably be dead without my wife.
Posted on 3/19/24 at 4:46 pm to Thundercles
quote:
If you didn't have your wife (or don't have one) would you be happy being a loner?
I spent my 20s being a heathen, and I certainly enjoy my alone time; but my family is by far the most important thing in my life.
I wouldn’t ever want to live my life without one.
Posted on 3/19/24 at 4:50 pm to Thundercles
If my wife dies I don’t think I’d remarry. Hope I never have to find out
Posted on 3/19/24 at 5:06 pm to wallowinit
I am sorry, my friend.
It is painful indeed.
It is painful indeed.
Posted on 3/19/24 at 5:45 pm to Thundercles
I got rid of my wife because she was a POS and have been so happy it's almost illegal.
Posted on 3/19/24 at 5:51 pm to Thundercles
Been divorced for awhile. 80% of the time I’d rather be alone there are times where it’s nice to have someone but there’s a reason I’m single I like doing what I want, when I want, how I want, where I want, and who I want to be with.
Posted on 3/19/24 at 5:59 pm to wallowinit
Prayers sent. I’m so sorry.
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