re: If you didn't have your wife (or don't have one) would you be happy being a loner?

Ben with my wife for 30 years. It would be very hard to not be with her on a daily basis. I believe I would survive but it would be very different….. I have a strong network of people around me that would be helpful in that transition period. But the question is whether I would find another woman. I like companionship so I think eventually I’m sure I would try to find someone.

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If you didn't have your wife (or don't have one) would you be happy being a loner?

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I’ve been married 29 years. I have made clear to my wife (no pics), that if something happens to her, there probably would be no one after her. There is probably not another woman in the world that would tolerate my crap so I don’t plan to try……

Needed some downtime last weekend. Wife gave me green light to take the boat to the island solo. It was great and should hold me over for awhile.

ETa: Thread made me think of this song. If I did become a loner, I'd want it to go something like this.

"Now he lives in the islands, fishes the pilings and drinks his green label each day. Writing his memoirs, loosing his hearing, but he don't give a damn what most people say. Through 86 years of perpetual motion, if he likes you he'll smile and sing. Jimmy, some of its magic, some of it's tragic, but I've had a good life all the way".

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would you be happy being a loner?

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Well...since you asked...

I am in my early 50's now. never been married and have no children. Not that I didn't try to have a wife and kids in my earlier years, it just never worked out. And now, it's just me and my 2 Cane Corsos in a log cabin on 50 acres in the Green Mountains of Vermont. Been here a little over 5 years now and am the happiest I have been in my entire life, with never a lonely day. When ever the topic arises, I've always tried to explain it as loneliness being an emotion that is experienced differently by different people. I am simply just not a person that is affected by it. Solitude energizes me and socialization exhausts me. Don't misunderstand that as being anti or awkwardly social, I am very adept at socializing and thoroughly enjoy it with the right people. I simply have minimal need for it and it is second to my preference for solitude. I like to consider myself a man of introspection and I know my comfort with solitude is a by-product of my childhood. Just didn't have a whole lot of personal connection while growing up. Parents were divorced before I have any memory of them together and both were married 4 times. This lead to me moving around ALOT! 13 different schools by the time I dropped out in 10th grade which means I basically spent my childhood as the "new kid" with very few friends. More often than not, I was alone and learned how to make the best of it. Oh. so I mentioned I dropped out of high school in 10th grade...that was because for my 16th birthday my father gave me the keys to his old beat up truck along with emancipation papers and a good luck pat on the back. Granted, I rebeled quite a bit and got into my fair amount of trouble like fights and disrespect for authority, but I wasn't shooting heroin and robbing liquor stores. So I dropped out of school and immediately went to work in construction. Had my GED completed 2 weeks later and an apartment with an 18 year old friend 2 months later. Much of that alone time as a kid in the 70s and 80s was spent on the inide of books and my imagination which I know greatly contributed to providing me with a higher intellect and problem solving skills on par with those that received the privledge of a much higher education. This was now the late 80's in Baton Rouge at the height of the club scene and admittedly I spent many years supplementing my income in illegal ways and continued that well into my 30's. Thankfully, I was able to make it through that period without any felonies and came out fairly unscathed. Did a few months at EBRPP, but charges were later dismissed. Eventually I finally matured enough to decide that fun is fun, but becoming legitimately and legally successful were what i really wanted. I'll spare you all these more boring details, but a parlayed my construction experience into a position with a company that trained me in the engineering field and busted my arse to get to a regular 6 digit income before I was 40. My younger days of wheeling and dealing taught me a lot of good finacial lessons that helped put me in the position I am in today. Always had a good bit of Wanderlust in my heart, this is my 8th state of residence and have traveled the world...often by myself. I have visited over 30 countries and been to every continent except Antartica. Now semi-retired here on my own little piece of heaven homestead, living peacefully growing and raising my food; egg and meat chickens now with plans for adding rabbits and pigs this year. Taking my yearly limit of deer and turkey right in my own backyard, growing my own MJ and just loving life. I am not pulling the same quality or quantity of ladies as I used to, but my needs are met and the drama is nonexistent.

"Lost my wife to cancer one year ago after 45 years of marriage. Not having her to go thru retirement years sucks. Have two wonderful kids and grandkids that mean the world, couldn’t make it without them."

Very sorry to hear that man. It might seem silly but when I go through a personal tragedy or loss I'm somehow reminded of the Dr Seuss quote "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."

GL

I dont think so. I need someone around to talk to, someone to do things for.

A German Shepherd might make a decent fill in.

frick yew I would be.

My wife broke her foot in November. Had to have a 3" plate installed. She was home for 4 fricking months every day. I'm retired, so it was really cramping my style.

Now that she's back to work, things are back to being awesome. I'm in my shop tinkering around and stoned as frick at 3:15 pm.