re: Is it upsetting to hear that a couple doesn't want children?

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So, I learned to make people really awkward so they'd leave me alone.

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I've always liked the idea of bringing up how babies are made. "Ohhh, that's where he's supposed to be cumming? Damn, no WONDER we haven't gotten pregnant, honey! Wrong hole! Oops!"

People don't really ask me those types of questions (guess I'm lucky), but I've heard people say they use a line like that. Shuts people up fast.

women were made to have babies and stay at home with their children and to have food on the table when the man comes home from work.

Any woman that doesn't do this is the devil.

Odds are one in three.


Chances are it's gonna be the wrong hole.

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I don't have kids, but I'd like to

I'm going only on my limited interactions with people who have passed through the "we don't want to have kids" stage and into the "we didn't have kids because of _______ stage."

They're usually not enjoyable company. Could I have just come across a bad batch of 5-10 couples in this category, and they don't reflect the majority? Sure.

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I think it may have something to do with different interests. People with kids are going to have very different interests than those with kids. Because those with kids become interested in their kids lives and try to tailor their lives around events and activities that will be enjoyable for their kids.

Couples without kids don't have to do that. They have no interest in activities that children will like, or events that are "family friendly."

Maybe some people become bitter because they can't have children. Maybe they tried and have been unable to so they just say they have no interest in it.

Who knows...

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hmm... I think that's an interesting observation. Why do you think that's the case?

I know a couple without kids (in their mid-40's) and they're one of the nicest, most sincere couples I know. That could be the exception though.

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I don't want to speculate about why I see the correlation....ok I will

For reference, I know one couple in their early 30s that probably won't have kids. They're really enjoyable people. I know a couple couples that won't have kids because they either can't or because there are health reasons not to do so. They're enjoyable enough.

I know 2 other couples pretty well that are older without kids. They're fricking horrendous human beings, and completely miserable. And I know 3-4 other couples that aren't having kids that I don't like but don't really know them that well.

So that's what I'm operating from. I'd guess that most people have my experience more than yours, but I could be wrong. Also, voluntary vs. involuntary is a crucial distinction in my hypothesis.

And, if you temporarily accept my premise that they're generally not the most enjoyable people, I think the question is whether they started that way (selfish, whatever) and that's why they didn't have kids, or whether they weren't originally that way, and people bugging them about kids or the lack of life fulfillment brought them there. And I don't have a good sense either way on that.

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I feel like I've encountered this before and I don't get it. Why does it seemingly bother other couples who have/are having kids?

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They made this choice and by you not emulating it you invalidate their opinion. This is especially true for younger people who have kids, older couples are less likely to do this.

My favorite are the reasons for you to have kids....
* You will regret it if you dont
* Who will take care of you when you are old?
* Who will continue your family line?

The reality is that all of those reasons suck. Can you imagine telling your child you had them so they could take care of you when you are old. Or you did it avoid having regrets?

Married and employed white people pay the brunt of the taxes. That said, you need t have children to keep your demographic's numbers up.

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I think it may have something to do with different interests. People with kids are going to have very different interests than those with kids. Because those with kids become interested in their kids lives and try to tailor their lives around events and activities that will be enjoyable for their kids.

Couples without kids don't have to do that. They have no interest in activities that children will like, or events that are "family friendly."

Maybe some people become bitter because they can't have children. Maybe they tried and have been unable to so they just say they have no interest in it.

Who knows...

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Yeah I'm sure it does honestly. But since we're talking about my personal perspective, I don't have kids, and hence I'm not that interested in kid-centric shite. The people I dislike who are on the no kids train aren't doing awesome shite made available by having an empty house, they're just bad people.

But, I will say that I'm biased in that I eventually want kids, so the idea of family stuff doesn't turn me off.

Some people believe that marriage is only to procreate the species. I think it is a decision that a couple make before marriage so they are both on the same page.

Most that are against having children are just money conscious. If their financial situation increased by say 50K/yr, they probably would change their mind.