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Started By
Message
We have got to come up with a better way to judge watermelons.
Posted on 5/17/26 at 9:53 pm
Posted on 5/17/26 at 9:53 pm
Or at least a way to hold these growers accountable. I’m on my third in a row that I had to basically toss.
Last year the tiny butthole method never failed me but something has changed this year. It’s not working and I have no recourse.
Last year the tiny butthole method never failed me but something has changed this year. It’s not working and I have no recourse.
20
Posted on 5/17/26 at 9:56 pm to OysterPoBoy
Big yellow mark
Posted on 5/17/26 at 9:58 pm to OysterPoBoy
quote:
Last year the tiny butthole method never failed me
You are the queen of watermelons!
Posted on 5/17/26 at 9:58 pm to OysterPoBoy
Isn't it a little early for good watermelons? I can't remember the last time I had a sweet one outside of July/August.
Posted on 5/17/26 at 9:58 pm to OysterPoBoy
The thump method has never failed me.
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:02 pm to OysterPoBoy
Have you tried XXXXXing your XXXX innit?
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:13 pm to GeorgeTheGreek
quote:
Big yellow mark
Had one of those today.
Garbage.
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:17 pm to OysterPoBoy
In the good old days, when the centers of watermelons were very sweet, good cooks would turn the thicker (than now) rind into watermelon pickles which are still an excellent find in some of the restaurants in Colonial Williamsburg.
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:18 pm to OysterPoBoy
Two finger rule on the white stripes. If the stripes are wider than two fingers you're Gucci. Less, it's a pass.
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:18 pm to OysterPoBoy
What I was told . . .
Take a single pine straw and lay it across (perpendicular to) the watermelon's main axis. If the pine straw rotates and aligns with the watermelons main axis, it's a ripe watermelon.
Have no test data to validate the method.
Take a single pine straw and lay it across (perpendicular to) the watermelon's main axis. If the pine straw rotates and aligns with the watermelons main axis, it's a ripe watermelon.
Have no test data to validate the method.
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:21 pm to OysterPoBoy
Sugartown or bust
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:21 pm to OysterPoBoy
Buy from her
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:22 pm to OysterPoBoy
Rose had the best method
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:22 pm to OysterPoBoy
quote:
Last year the tiny butthole method never failed me
Is this some kind of Vatican thing or something?
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:24 pm to OysterPoBoy
quote:
We have got to come up with a better way to judge watermelons.
"Your dogwhistle questions don't fool us, Nazi!" - the SPLC
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:24 pm to OysterPoBoy
quote:
the tiny butthole method
I use this all the time but not for watermelons
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:28 pm to UnitedFruitCompany
Name checks out
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:30 pm to OysterPoBoy
Too early baw. Check back in 6 weeks
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:32 pm to OysterPoBoy
quote:
I’m on my third in a row that I had to basically toss.
Have you tried returning it to the store?
Posted on 5/17/26 at 10:35 pm to OysterPoBoy
I judge them by the content of their character like MLK intended.
This post was edited on 5/17/26 at 10:36 pm
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