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re: My MIL opened up a credit card in my wife’s name
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:49 am to Newrow
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:49 am to Newrow
The first thing you need to do is whateber it takes to lock your info, as once you cut this off she is very likely to do it again in the future. It’s likely she has maxed her own credit out. Then you need to tell your family and any of your wife’s siblings as she may do it to them. Once someone starts they rarely stop. She needs to go to some counseling. Good luck, that’s a horrible situation.
1
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:50 am to Chad504boy
quote:
would daycare have been cheaper?
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:52 am to Afrojedi
quote:
Also, based on your wifes reaction doesnt seem like this was a huge surprise to her.
So this is what worries me more than the money.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:52 am to Oilfieldbiology
quote:
OP is being naive and sentimental.
Or liked the free babysitting (or what he thought was free)
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:53 am to Newrow
Are you under the age of 25? You seem awfully naive and lacking in common sense. Honestly think about the lesson and example you’re setting for your kids.
Also,
What did she spend the money on and over what period of time?
What kind of car does she drive?
How big is the house she’s selling and why is she selling it?
Also,
What did she spend the money on and over what period of time?
What kind of car does she drive?
How big is the house she’s selling and why is she selling it?
This post was edited on 5/21/21 at 9:58 am
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:53 am to baldona
do people in this day and age really not have credit karma on their phone where they monitor stuff like this?
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:53 am to Oilfieldbiology
quote:
Not really. She still stole. It sounds like OP would have helped her out if she had just asked. She’s a thief.
If it was used for basic needs then sitting her down and asking why she didn't come to them in the first place is the way to start. Perhaps she was having a temporary setback -- maybe she lost her job due to Covid? You never know.
I'd have A LOT more sympathy for her if she was using this to survive and just thought she could pay off the credit card debt before anyone even knew about it. Helping family in a time of need is something worthwhile to teach your children.
If this was simply for her own pleasure purchases, F*CK HER. Turn her a$$ over to the police and teach your kids that these sorts of actions have consequences.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:54 am to Newrow
You sound like a cuck and a pushover. Your MIL sounds like a thieving cünt that’s got you pegged.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:54 am to Newrow
Here is a link that details what all you need to do to freeze your credit files at the big three
https://krebsonsecurity.com/2018/09/credit-freezes-are-free-let-the-ice-age-begin/
Good luck.
https://krebsonsecurity.com/2018/09/credit-freezes-are-free-let-the-ice-age-begin/
Good luck.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:55 am to Newrow
quote:
It’s in the upper teen thousands.
Oh that's a big relationship bomb right there. I'd cut her off.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:56 am to Newrow
quote:
It’s in the upper teen thousands.
She would be selling her car and some other shite to pay that off or I would file a police report.
I bet she drives a $50,000 car too.
This post was edited on 5/21/21 at 9:59 am
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:57 am to 21zereaux
OP, here's a standardized credit card form to get notarized. it will transfer the debt over to your mother n law and out of your wife's name.
CC debt transfer form
CC debt transfer form
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:58 am to Newrow
1. You and you’re wife need to be a United front. Do not go against your wife’s decision
2. Get life lock immediately
3. Paying it is just to save your wife’s credit. If you pay it, you need to still set the boundaries your wife wants.
4. Only once or if your wife wants the relationship again do you offer to fix whatever grandma’s problem is
2. Get life lock immediately
3. Paying it is just to save your wife’s credit. If you pay it, you need to still set the boundaries your wife wants.
4. Only once or if your wife wants the relationship again do you offer to fix whatever grandma’s problem is
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:59 am to Newrow
Does she gamble ?
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:59 am to Newrow
Is your birthday coming up might be getting that new side by side you been wanting. And Tomei has a big arse scare on her back.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:59 am to Chad504boy
quote:
OP, here's a standardized credit card form to get notarized. it will transfer the debt over to your mother n law and out of your wife's name
Thanks. This is what I was looking for. You da man.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 10:00 am to Newrow
quote:
My wife wants no relationship with her right
Then you should have no relationship with her right now. Don't ever go against your wife on something like this. Ask her outright if she wants you to call the cops and file a police report or not. If she says yes, do it immediately.
Everyone makes mistakes. You are correct. But no one is above consequence for mistakes. Y'all have to decide what that means. The consequence of calling and taking legal action, or cutting her off from the kids, or both... But if there are no consequences, there will be no learning. Just making her pay it off slowly won't teach anything.
This post was edited on 5/21/21 at 10:02 am
Posted on 5/21/21 at 10:02 am to Newrow
This type of behavior only escalates. At the very least, you need to take precautions with one of those fraud protection services. Good luck.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 10:04 am to Newrow
Haha
Posted on 5/21/21 at 10:05 am to Chad504boy
quote:
OP, here's a standardized credit card form to get notarized. it will transfer the debt over to your mother n law and out of your wife's name.
I didn't know that existed... that's awesome
OP, do you know what she spent it on by any chance? Like essentials or does she maybe have a shopping/hoarding habit?
I can't imagine how your wife feels. I hope y'all are able to get through this and get her whatever kind of help she needs so you can eventually mend this.
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