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re: My MIL opened up a credit card in my wife’s name
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:44 am to Newrow
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:44 am to Newrow
quote:
It’s in the upper teen thousands.
Good God almighty and Christ on a cracker!
Are you fricking sh!tting us with wanting to help her pay the balance and interest? TF outta here.
Take the advice of others in this thread because you can bet your arse with 110% certainty this isn't the first time she's "stolen" from you.
And, by the way, this isn't a "mistake". It's a crime she committed against her own kid that, as a bonus, will also f*uck you guys for years to come.
0
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:44 am to MMauler
quote:
it's basic living expenses to get by, then you're talking about something else entirely.
Not really. She still stole. It sounds like OP would have helped her out if she had just asked. She’s a thief.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:44 am to Lester Earl
quote:
What does she use the money for?
Does she have a job?
When did she open the CC? Was it recent ?
What’s the back story.
These questions should all be answered, OP
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:44 am to Newrow
quote:
I don’t like the legal system and I don’t want to get the law involved. She’s selling her house right now and we’re talking about her paying back the credit card balance with the profit from the house.
This is the part where she tells you after she's sold the house that she can't pay back YOUR credit card because she probably already owes a metric dick ton on credit cards in her own name and couldn't get approved for another card which is why she took one out in your wife's name.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:45 am to Newrow
quote:
No pics of wife
Understandable
quote:
but I have 3 sisters
Go on...
quote:
and mom
You know the rules!
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:45 am to Tyga Woods
Just imagine what is going on in her mind every time she swipes that card to make a purchase. In that moment she knows what she is doing is wrong and is effectively stealing from you.
Did she even make 1 payment on that card?
Did she even make 1 payment on that card?
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:45 am to MikeBRLA
Does she have any property or assets you can sell? I'd start taking shiat, right after I locked my SSNs.
I'd force her to sit down and layout everything else she has going on, with the threat of pressing charges otherwise. There's no way she did this without having maxed out everything else.
I'd force her to sit down and layout everything else she has going on, with the threat of pressing charges otherwise. There's no way she did this without having maxed out everything else.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:45 am to Newrow
quote:
but am I an idiot for trying to keep my MIL and wife at peace?
Only time will tell.
Lots of this kind of crap happened between my husband and his parents and sisters. He basically calls them once a year to check on them now. If you let it slide, it might happen again.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:46 am to YOURADHERE
quote:
This is the part where she tells you after she's sold the house that she can't pay back YOUR credit card because she probably already owes a metric dick ton on credit cards in her own name and couldn't get approved for another card which is why she took one out in your wife's name.
That’s a bingo
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:47 am to GreenRockTiger
quote:
If you let it slide, it might happen again.
Might?!
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:47 am to Nguyener
quote:
As for the OP: have you at minimum frozen all of you and your wife and kids socials, pulled all credit reports, contacted reporting agencies, and put identity theft monitoring into place?
Yes. We’re good other than the credit card.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:47 am to Newrow
quote:
She’s selling her house right now and we’re talking about her paying back the credit card balance with the profit from the house.
Talking about it? That shite needs to be set in stone
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:48 am to Newrow
Since it was your wife's identity that was stolen, I think you have to follow your wife's lead on what she wants to do. Obviously you should provide whatever advice you can to your wife to help her decide what she wants to do, but if she decides to end the relationship with her mom or to contact law enforcement, then I think you have to let her do that.
That's a really crappy situation, I'm sorry you and your wife are having to deal with it.
That's a really crappy situation, I'm sorry you and your wife are having to deal with it.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:48 am to Newrow
Call Dave Ramsey. He'll know what to do.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:48 am to Newrow
quote:
it's in the upper teen thousands
Press charges. File identity theft and fraud claims. Don't leave your kids with her again. That's not okay. That's felony charges. This isn't a small ordeal.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:48 am to Panny Crickets
quote:
Might?!
Yeah I know - was trying to stay optimistic since the OP seems to be
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:49 am to Newrow
In all seriousness, like others have said, this more than likely isnt the first time and if you let it go it wont be the last. Nobody goes that hard the first time they steal from a loved one, it starts slow and builds to this. I get not wanting to have the law involved, im the same way but that means that you have to be the law. A simple apology and half assed paying it back simply want do imo.
Gotta tell her you expect it paid back in full, stay the hell away from your house and the kids relationship will have to be a discussion between you and your wife. Whether you can fully see it or not this is a huge deal. Also, based on your wifes reaction doesnt seem like this was a huge surprise to her.
Gotta tell her you expect it paid back in full, stay the hell away from your house and the kids relationship will have to be a discussion between you and your wife. Whether you can fully see it or not this is a huge deal. Also, based on your wifes reaction doesnt seem like this was a huge surprise to her.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:49 am to GreenRockTiger
OP is being naive and sentimental.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:49 am to Newrow
I have never thought of something like this happening but I now know I would be furious.
Posted on 5/21/21 at 9:49 am to BFANLC
quote:
Is your MIL worthy of MILF status?
Technically it would need to be GILF status
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