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re: Last night i found out my 68 year old dad has a mistress...
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:24 am to SECdragonmaster
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:24 am to SECdragonmaster
quote:
You are going to get a lot of bad advice on this topic so let me try and be helpful.
Your parents have problems in their marriage or Dad would not be stepping out. Both he and mom need to seek a therapist to fix these issues and any marriage can be saved. But your Dad has to want to save his marriage.
It is not fair of Dad to expect you to keep this secret for him. Give him a week to come clean and break off the affair or tell your Mom about it. You are betraying your Mom every minute you don't tell her and that is not fair to you or her.
Lastly, I see that you are a female so can I get a few pics of you in yoga pants?
GOLF CLAP
0
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:26 am to baldona
oh, I have no intentions of saying anything to my mom about this. if this is a pattern, she may already know, like some have already said. it was just brutal getting a text from my dad meant for someone not my mom.
and all I keep thinking is this is some two-bit whore who sees money signs in her eyes, for my dad, who may in fact being going through early dementia, and how my mom has been with him this whole time. my mom didn't marry him for his money...he didn't have any back then.
my concern is my mom and my son, that's it. he can go spend the rest of his life in a Nevada brothel for all I care, but this bitch he's seeing will come after the money, if there is a divorce.
and all I keep thinking is this is some two-bit whore who sees money signs in her eyes, for my dad, who may in fact being going through early dementia, and how my mom has been with him this whole time. my mom didn't marry him for his money...he didn't have any back then.
my concern is my mom and my son, that's it. he can go spend the rest of his life in a Nevada brothel for all I care, but this bitch he's seeing will come after the money, if there is a divorce.
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:26 am to Jake88
It's funny how in this thread there are so many dudes rationalizing and speculating on the alleged fact that the wife knows, she's cool with it and it's likely an open relationship.
You can tell who the guilty are and how obvious they are with their projecting bullshite.
I'm a dude and I would tell my mom if dad was pulling this bullshite. But I will never have to do that because my dad is one of the most moral, stand up guys I know and he's been with my mom for 42 years. Knowing him is one of the greatest things in my life.
You can tell who the guilty are and how obvious they are with their projecting bullshite.
I'm a dude and I would tell my mom if dad was pulling this bullshite. But I will never have to do that because my dad is one of the most moral, stand up guys I know and he's been with my mom for 42 years. Knowing him is one of the greatest things in my life.
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:27 am to HubbaBubba
Have an upvote Hubbabubba, although I don't completely agree with all of your part D. Some wives aren't messy or naggy, seem to do all the right things, but for whatever reason that exists deep in the heart of a man, the man might stray anyway.
OP needs to take the high road and let her dad live his own life.
OP needs to take the high road and let her dad live his own life.
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:28 am to ladyluckUGA
quote:I would immediately insist that your dad get checked out, and prepare yourself, and him, for bad news. This was my dad nine years ago. He died last week with me by his side, and we buried him on Saturday. He didn't know who I was for much of the last two years. Alzheimer's.
ladyluckUGA
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:29 am to ladyluckUGA
"Lucky bastard can now retire happy and at peace. This is the way to live."
-OT
-OT
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:30 am to G Vice
quote:I understand. It was a huge exaggeration just to make a point that his douchebag dad has the wool pulled over his eyes right now, and that the grass isn't always greener in the other pasture, yaddy-yadda.
although I don't completely agree with all of your part D
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:31 am to G Vice
quote:Being married 50 years since you were 18 and she's the only woman you've been with.
but for whatever reason that exists deep in the heart of a man, the man might stray anyway
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:32 am to ladyluckUGA
If they have been married 50 years, I would say the chances are this isn't his first time. Even if your mom doesn't know for sure, I bet it would not surprise her.
What did the text say that he sent you that was meant for her?
What did the text say that he sent you that was meant for her?
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:32 am to ladyluckUGA
quote:
ok, this is interesting. my sister, husband and I, as well as other family members have been talking about how bad my dad's memory has been for a while. Seriously, like he'll tell us something and not 10 minutes later tell us the exact same thing again, and we're like, yeah, you just told us that a few minutes ago. and he looks totally puzzled.
Sometimes people with dementia think daughters are wives, etc.
Maybe there is no mistress
This post was edited on 1/16/18 at 9:34 am
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:33 am to Brazos
I would protect my mom and my family. Your mom finding out doesn't accomplish that. I would talk dad out of doing this stupid shite as best i could.
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:33 am to GeorgeQGlass
quote:
Oh, no fricking surprise there. See my above post. fricking nailed it.
Well look at you go, modern day Sherlock Holmes! She literally has "lady" in username. So glad you were able to crack the case before anyone else.
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:34 am to ladyluckUGA
Dementia adds in a new element.
With him not being fully mentally cognizant, I would sit him down (without your mom) and just tell him that you're concerned about the possible ramifications of him not being in total control and having his side piece take advantage.
With him not being fully mentally cognizant, I would sit him down (without your mom) and just tell him that you're concerned about the possible ramifications of him not being in total control and having his side piece take advantage.
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:34 am to ladyluckUGA
quote:
oh, I have no intentions of saying anything to my mom about this.
That's a mistake if you truly believe that this gold digging whore is taking advantage of your dad and is only in it for the money.
If you want to protect your family, your son, and your inheritance, you need to blow this frick up now and that starts with talking to mom about this.
Your dad has a duty to his family including kids and grandkids, not some gold digging whore.
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:36 am to Sentrius
If blowing it up leads to divorce, guess who gets dad to marry her. Inheritance now hers.
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:36 am to cssamerican
Two Christmases!
In all seriousness, this. I had the same thing happen, confronted him about it, told him to make a decision and left it at that. I don’t know what that decision was, but that was ten years ago and my parents are still together.
quote:
Keep it a secret. I doubt this is new behavior. Why ruin your mom’s life.
In all seriousness, this. I had the same thing happen, confronted him about it, told him to make a decision and left it at that. I don’t know what that decision was, but that was ten years ago and my parents are still together.
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:37 am to Sentrius
quote:I understand how you feel, and outrage might compel you to do that, but I would have insisted that my dad do that himself under these circumstances. Nothing good could come of it if you were to do it.
I'm a dude and I would tell my mom if dad was pulling this bullshite. But I will never have to do that because my dad is one of the most moral, stand up guys I know and he's been with my mom for 42 years. Knowing him is one of the greatest things in my life.
My own dad, husband for 65 years, passed away last week and we buried him on Saturday. If he had ever gone out and done that, I'm not sure what the effect would have been had I found out. Like you, I had a father who was incredibly moral, virtuous and awesome, and his funeral was an uplifting celebration, not a solemn, sad event.
Oh, and
for your supporting remarks when I discussed my wife's son passing here a few weeks ago. Much appreciated.Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:39 am to Jor Jor The Dinosaur
Just because they've been married for almost 50 yrs does t mean he's done this before. But also, people of that generation meaning women didn't im sure like it when it did happen but often chose to remain in the marriage for a multitude of reasons.
I know my mom would never forgive me if I knew and didn't tell her -- she was pretty pisssed that she was the last to know that my brother and his wife were headed for divorce.
I'd check the dementia angle -- seriously. And OP prepare yourself for the fact that this lady actually may be someone that you already know.
I know my mom would never forgive me if I knew and didn't tell her -- she was pretty pisssed that she was the last to know that my brother and his wife were headed for divorce.
I'd check the dementia angle -- seriously. And OP prepare yourself for the fact that this lady actually may be someone that you already know.
Posted on 1/16/18 at 9:41 am to ladyluckUGA
quote:
I told him if he thinks he's going to bring some gold digging whore around my son (7 years old and his only grandchild) he had another thing coming.
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