- My Forums
- Tiger Rant
- LSU Recruiting
- SEC Rant
- Saints Talk
- Pelicans Talk
- More Sports Board
- Fantasy Sports
- Golf Board
- Soccer Board
- O-T Lounge
- Tech Board
- Home/Garden Board
- Outdoor Board
- Health/Fitness Board
- Movie/TV Board
- Book Board
- Music Board
- Political Talk
- Money Talk
- Fark Board
- Gaming Board
- Travel Board
- Food/Drink Board
- Ticket Exchange
- TD Help Board
Customize My Forums- View All Forums
- Show Left Links
- Topic Sort Options
- Trending Topics
- Recent Topics
- Active Topics
Started By
Message
0
Posted on 8/22/21 at 7:40 pm to lsunurse
I didnt realize he had passed. I remember you posting he was having mental issues. Wasn't he a TV repair man?
Posted on 8/22/21 at 7:41 pm to lsunurse
Prayers for you, nurse. I can't speak to losing a parent. But I lost my father-in-law in January. That man had more to do with who I am today than my own parents.
It's been a struggle. I simply appreciate his influence and who he was to me. There may never be a time I'm not gut-punched. And I'm okay with that. I'm simply thankful he was a part of my life.
It's been a struggle. I simply appreciate his influence and who he was to me. There may never be a time I'm not gut-punched. And I'm okay with that. I'm simply thankful he was a part of my life.
Posted on 8/22/21 at 7:53 pm to lsunurse
In my family's case, we looked at it as a blessing when my mom passed. She was in such horrible pain in her last year that I believe she welcomed death knowing there was a better place waiting for her.
My dad passed 9 months after her and he suffered from advanced dementia. Watching him look for mom around the house was heartbreaking and worse to remind him she had passed on was tough for all of us.
Yes, we miss them, but the thought that they are both together now without the physical and mental suffering they endured makes it a bit easier for us to accept our loss on those special days.
My dad passed 9 months after her and he suffered from advanced dementia. Watching him look for mom around the house was heartbreaking and worse to remind him she had passed on was tough for all of us.
Yes, we miss them, but the thought that they are both together now without the physical and mental suffering they endured makes it a bit easier for us to accept our loss on those special days.
This post was edited on 8/22/21 at 7:54 pm
Posted on 8/22/21 at 8:09 pm to lsunurse
Damn nurse, I didn't know your dad passed away. My condolences.
My dad passed away a week before my 20th birthday. He had been sick and although I knew it was coming, nothing prepares you for when it actually happens.
Since he has passed there has not been a single day in which I have not thought about him. The only thing that truly gets rid of the grief is time. I know that's not the best answer, but it helps by finding your middle ground.
For me, its being realistic. Knowing that we all will die and that life is filled with the unexpected and as much as I wish I could go back and do some things different, that's not an option. Let him live within you. Be strong for your family.
We all grieve different and for me, its dealing with it on my own, but there is no right or wrong way to grieve.
And as difficult as it might be, you have to continue to life your life through him.
My dad passed away a week before my 20th birthday. He had been sick and although I knew it was coming, nothing prepares you for when it actually happens.
Since he has passed there has not been a single day in which I have not thought about him. The only thing that truly gets rid of the grief is time. I know that's not the best answer, but it helps by finding your middle ground.
For me, its being realistic. Knowing that we all will die and that life is filled with the unexpected and as much as I wish I could go back and do some things different, that's not an option. Let him live within you. Be strong for your family.
We all grieve different and for me, its dealing with it on my own, but there is no right or wrong way to grieve.
And as difficult as it might be, you have to continue to life your life through him.
Posted on 8/22/21 at 8:31 pm to lsunurse
My experience has been that people that have the most trouble are the one’s that want things to be normal again. It never will be. Find your “new” normal. And yes, your new normal can be a wonderful and fulfilling life if you embrace it.
Time is your best friend. I wish I could tell you when the time is up, but it’s different for everyone. That feeling you get now when you think about you dad will fade. One day you will think about him and smile instead. I hope that day comes soon for you.
My mother died 39 years ago when I was 20. I can still remember that first time I thought about her and smiled.
Time is your best friend. I wish I could tell you when the time is up, but it’s different for everyone. That feeling you get now when you think about you dad will fade. One day you will think about him and smile instead. I hope that day comes soon for you.
My mother died 39 years ago when I was 20. I can still remember that first time I thought about her and smiled.
Posted on 8/22/21 at 8:39 pm to lsunurse
Unfortunately, never. You may accept he’s gone after a year or so, but it still hits me like a freight train at the most random times. I was 32, he was 57. Will be 10 years December.
Obviously everyone is different. Good luck buddy.
Obviously everyone is different. Good luck buddy.
Posted on 8/22/21 at 8:45 pm to lsunurse
Nurse it’s still so fresh. Let yourself have a cry. You did so much for him. My dad shot him self 21 years ago; I understand how hard it is to lose someone after going through troubled times. It does get a little easier every year but anniversaries and milestones still hurt. Staying busy is the best you can do, and it’s important to keep moving forward and not get stuck in regret and despair.
Posted on 8/22/21 at 9:05 pm to lsunurse
quote:
How have others coped with this? When does is truly get to where you just don’t all of a sudden get punched in the face with the grief? A year? 2 years?
You never get over it. It just gets easier. You will think of them every single day if you were close.
The best is when you get to have a dream that they are in. You hate to wake up.
Posted on 8/22/21 at 9:08 pm to lsunurse
quote:
How have others coped with this?
We all handle death and “the grief cycle” differently. Some people suppress their feelings for various reasons. Dealing with death; especially that of a parent, sibling, child, or loved one can be very painful. I’m an advocate of counseling to help aid in the healing process.
Posted on 8/22/21 at 9:29 pm to lsunurse
How have others coped with this? When does is truly get to where you just don’t all of a sudden get punched in the face with the grief? A year? 2 years?
Yesterday was 18 months since my Mom passed. I still miss her terribly. It’s better, I guess you dirt of grow accustomed to the loss.
Yesterday was 18 months since my Mom passed. I still miss her terribly. It’s better, I guess you dirt of grow accustomed to the loss.
Posted on 8/22/21 at 9:39 pm to lsunurse
You never truly get over it. But you’ll grow a little bit of a callus around your emotions and it won’t hurt as much. I’m sorry for your loss.
Posted on 8/22/21 at 9:40 pm to Carnac
It’s going on 3 years since my mother passed unexpectedly on Christmas Day 2018. Nurse and I have talked for hours about our experiences. Even 3 years in, I get these rushes of grief out of the blue and I become a mess for a few minutes and can’t function. It’s hard to even talk about. But as time goes on, things get easier. They never get better, so to speak, but it gets easier.
Posted on 8/22/21 at 10:00 pm to lsunurse
I’ve watched my parents go through the loss of their parents. Mine are now in their seventies and I dread the day I lose them.
Posted on 8/22/21 at 10:28 pm to Ezra Reed
quote:
The best is when you get to have a dream that they are in. You hate to wake up.
I have some of that. Being able to talk to, hug, laugh with, and feel Dad in my dreams was an enormous comfort and simultaneously felt exceptionally dangerous to me in my grief. I struggle with it occasionally but am no longer consumed. Although I still say things like "I love you Dad.* and *I miss you Dad" aloud when it becomes intense.
I don't know that people ever fully recover from the loss of someone who they love completely but trying to live in a way that balances your own needs with the kinds of upright standards that your parent would have hoped for will be my conscious adaptation going forward. Finding joy is a major means to that end when still adjusting to the loss. Conversation with and support from others who also loved the departed were a big part of my earlier process of grieving.
Posted on 8/22/21 at 11:06 pm to molsusports
Well said.
My dad and I used to talk every Sunday. Several years ago he was diagnosed with cancer and was gone 90 days later. Happened so fast...like the house burned down and I was left standing in the smoking ruins wondering what happened. Long long grieving process that doesn't ever end. I focus on the good memories mostly now. But, as long as it's been, there a still sunday's when I'll think 'need to call dad today' then I'll remember he's gone and a sadness washes over me. Grief is a motherfckr...
My dad and I used to talk every Sunday. Several years ago he was diagnosed with cancer and was gone 90 days later. Happened so fast...like the house burned down and I was left standing in the smoking ruins wondering what happened. Long long grieving process that doesn't ever end. I focus on the good memories mostly now. But, as long as it's been, there a still sunday's when I'll think 'need to call dad today' then I'll remember he's gone and a sadness washes over me. Grief is a motherfckr...
Posted on 8/22/21 at 11:53 pm to lsunurse
quote:
How have others coped with this? When does is truly get to where you just don’t all of a sudden get punched in the face with the grief? A year? 2 years?
I’m very sorry for your loss. There’s no easy fixed answer to your question. With both my parents-after the initial waves of grief flattened out I’d get bushwhacked by it about every week or two-for a while-because that’s about how often I regularly saw them. The degree of grief each time lessened gradually from around the six month mark through the first year. Then occasions, birthdays, anniversary, holidays, and particular places could trigger sadness.
After that first year or year and a half, grief was only being stimulated by pleasant memories of them or pleasant places and occasions I associated with them, so, in the long run, the good memories (and time) turned grief in on itself and left me with only fond memories in place of grief.
I hope that made sense.
It will get better despite how much it hurts now. I don’t know when. I just know it will. You are in my and Mrs M’s prayers.
Posted on 8/23/21 at 12:08 am to lsunurse
Celebration.
Wtf, honestly people need to stop with the bullshite.
How long do you want to live to be,100? Ask most 90 year olds, they will say “kinda wish I would have died before my friends and a couple children and a grandchild did”
We all die, it’s inevitable. Why we believe that being a shell of yourself, soiling your diapers, hating pretty much everything you “need to learn how to do” to live your last few years is somehow a great thing that people who croak a decade or two earlier will “miss”.
Death is peace. All your horrible memories are gone, all your worries, over. Even the good things are fleeting. Don’t see death as bad, see it for what it is….the end…a peace no one else can comprehend while alive.
Wtf, honestly people need to stop with the bullshite.
How long do you want to live to be,100? Ask most 90 year olds, they will say “kinda wish I would have died before my friends and a couple children and a grandchild did”
We all die, it’s inevitable. Why we believe that being a shell of yourself, soiling your diapers, hating pretty much everything you “need to learn how to do” to live your last few years is somehow a great thing that people who croak a decade or two earlier will “miss”.
Death is peace. All your horrible memories are gone, all your worries, over. Even the good things are fleeting. Don’t see death as bad, see it for what it is….the end…a peace no one else can comprehend while alive.
Posted on 8/23/21 at 3:53 am to lsunurse
Almost a year for me. It gets easier every day but i still think of him every day.
Posted on 8/23/21 at 4:09 am to lsunurse
I remember wondering what I'd feel like when my dad had been dead 20 years. I was young when mine was called home. I grieved for almost 5 years. It was very hard on me. I tried to gut it out, but that's just it. There is no end to death, but It isn't forever. The pain will dull if you allow it.
I believe that when I die, I will see my father again. It eases the pain. You don't get over the death of a parent. You learn to live life without them.
As of Last month, I've been living life without my father for 20 years. It still isn't easy.
P.S. Someone from my past asked me how my father was doing. Obviously this person wasn't a great personal friend because they didn't know about my father's death but did know my father well. It is harder now for the other unknowing person to hear the news than it is for me to give it. It just takes time.
I believe that when I die, I will see my father again. It eases the pain. You don't get over the death of a parent. You learn to live life without them.
As of Last month, I've been living life without my father for 20 years. It still isn't easy.
P.S. Someone from my past asked me how my father was doing. Obviously this person wasn't a great personal friend because they didn't know about my father's death but did know my father well. It is harder now for the other unknowing person to hear the news than it is for me to give it. It just takes time.
This post was edited on 8/23/21 at 4:34 am
Page 6 of 7
Popular
Back to top
Follow TigerDroppings for LSU Football News