Are Single People Happier Than Married People?

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Everything you think you know about single people is wrong

Have you heard the one about how getting married makes people happier, healthier, less self-centered and less isolated?

What the research actually shows is that our conventional wisdom about single people can be spectacularly wrong.

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Single people are stereotypically the self-centered ones, yet research begs to differ:

multiple national surveys have shown that single people are more likely to support, visit, advise and stay in touch with their parents and siblings than are currently married or previously married people. They have more friends, and they are also more likely to socialize with, help and encourage their friends and neighbors. Research that follows people over time finds that people who get married typically become more insular than they were when they were single, even if they don’t have kids.

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Media headlines often proclaim that, according to the latest research, married people are in some way better off than single people.

Sometimes the currently married do better, but only during the first years of their marriage. Follow everyone who ever married for at least four years, as another Journal of Marriage and Family study did, and you will see that the people who married were no happier, no healthier, no less depressed and had no higher self-esteem than the people who stayed single. In fact, the only difference favored single people: They had more contact with their parents and spent more time with their friends.

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In the rush to declare married people the winners of the well-being sweepstakes, all the ways that single life can be fulfilling get trampled. For example, single people value meaningful work more than married people do. They also score higher on scales measuring personal growth and development, autonomy and self-determination. The more self-sufficient singles are, the less often they experience negative emotions. Self-sufficiency among married people, on the other hand, is correlated with experiencing negative feelings.

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WaPo



As a recently married bro, it pains me to see so many young people who get married in their early 20's and have kids because they think it's the thing to do. The truth is that's a good way to end up unhappy for a large portion of one's life. I was, and still am, very independent and was perfectly happy being single for the rest of my life. I only got married after finding myself in a good situation and deciding to retire from the game (after many successful years, might I add). I never felt pressure to do it. Same way I don't feel pressure to have kids.

Married people and couples with children are like a cult. They want to suggest that everyone join the cult so they can be as "happy" as they are, completely ignoring the unhappiness that awaits one's being married or having children before one is ready.

I'd like to encourage single bros. Keep up your hustle until you decide you're ready. Don't settle down with someone just because your married family members are unhappy and jelly that you have independence.