re: What are some of your cringiest moments?

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Aren’t you retarded?

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Yes, but how is that relevant?

I shook a girls hand after a date one time.

When I was in high school I had a part time job after school as a stock boy at a Fred's Dollar Store. I was stocking a shelf and I heard a voice say, "Hey Doctor Strangelove!". I turned around and saw my cousins wife who had put on a lot of weight since I had last seen her, (about 3 years before at some function). We chatted a bit and I noticed her belly was protruding and I congratulated her and she said, "what for?" I immediately pointed to her belly and said, "for the baby". She looked at me and her brow furrowed and told me, "I'm not pregnant". As soon as her face changed, I knew I had funked up. I tried to laugh it off and could not do anything but stutter and stammer and she huffed out of there quickly. I'm sure I came off off as a retard.

I travel often for work and I still make the mistake of saying "You too" when the lady at the gate tells me to have a good flight.

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On maybe but not inside, that didn't happen.

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I filled her pussy with piss.

Inside the vagina = inside the girl

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you mid-western yankees most certainly do not fit in and this charade puts the cherry on top of proving that

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Thanks baw

I was hanging out with a bud, and we pulled into the driveway where his brother and brothers gf were outside talking. Jokingly I said “hey I thought y’all broke up?” But........ the actually had about 15 min before. He just started laughing, my friend said dude uncool they really just did!! The only thing I could say was NUUU UHHHHHHHH!!

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I kept telling all the Ohio State fans at whatever bar that we were at to "get fricked yankees" while trying to sing their O-H-I-O song, over and over and over again.

I then pissed myself and passed out in the bar.

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The Bucknut fans are bad, but you're lucky there were no tea-baggin' Gumps in the Quarter that night.

My first year doing windshield replacements a lady called me up saying her windshield was leaking. I asked her if she’d had it replaced recently and she just said yea a few months ago. I made comments that there are too many windshield guys who don’t care and don’t know what they are doing. When I got done talking she politely said I was the one who replaced it.

Also, I once got into a nasty debate on Saints Talk and said Stephone Anthony will no doubt be a PB LB for us. He got traded shortly afterwards, a-hole bumped the thread also

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I once sent a text to my boss saying "my fricking boss wants me to come in today because he is to lazy to do shite himself" - Was meant for my GF at the time. So...I lost that job

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I sent an email at my last job talking about what a piece of shite this girl I had to work with was, except I sent it to her. Luckily she was just a vendor and my boss didn't care when she forwarded it to him.