Such a gloomy celebrity death week got me to thinking - rock star life spans

If Ozzy Osbourne can make it to 76yo

quote:

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He said in interviews that he should have died “a thousand times” given how much his body endured.

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That should recalculate actuarial tables, lower life insurance rates, recalibrate mindset of the “killers” eg, seems hard drugs won’t get you while sugar/processed food do. Snort a line and bite a bat but don’t eat fruit loops! Know he died of Parkinson’s related and no clue what, if any lifestyle is linked to it…but in general, a lot of people who did not make it to 76 did not bite a bat or do hard drugs.

Recalibration of Hope! Most importantly should give everyone on Earth hope (for long life)! Damn.

GPT doing work:

1. The Bat Incident (1982)
• Location: Des Moines, Iowa
• During a concert, a fan threw a live bat onto the stage. Ozzy, thinking it was rubber, bit its head off.
• He had to get rabies shots afterward.
• This became one of the most iconic (and misunderstood) rock moments in history.

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?? 2. The Dove Incident (1981)
• At a meeting with CBS Records to celebrate his solo deal, Ozzy, heavily intoxicated, pulled out two live doves from his coat and bit one’s head off in front of horrified executives.
• The idea was to release them peacefully into the air… but the drugs and alcohol said otherwise.

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???? 3. The Alamo Incident (1982)
• In San Antonio, Texas, Ozzy was arrested for urinating on the Alamo Cenotaph (not the actual Alamo building).
• He was wearing Sharon’s dress because she had hidden his clothes to keep him from going out drunk.
• He was banned from San Antonio for 10 years.

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?? 4. The Cocaine Ants Story
• On tour with Mötley Crüe, Ozzy snorted a line of ants off the sidewalk after running out of cocaine (according to Crüe’s autobiography The Dirt).
• He then urinated on the ground and licked it up.
• Nikki Sixx (Mötley Crüe bassist) said Ozzy “won” their competition for most extreme behavior.

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?? 5. Daily Drug Budget
• In the late ’70s and early ’80s, Ozzy claimed he would spend $1,000 per day on cocaine, and wash it down with copious amounts of booze.
• He said in interviews that he should have died “a thousand times” given how much his body endured.

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??? 6. He Forgot He Was Married
• Ozzy once woke up in a hotel room, saw a woman lying next to him, and called security thinking she was an intruder. It was his wife, Sharon.

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?? Bonus Quote from Ozzy:

“I was doing a line of cocaine that was so long it needed a runway. I would have snorted the state of Florida if you laid it out.”