re: Question for the OT… GF, EX wife and pictures.

If u have lived this situation its easy to see whats going on...

Ex only sends these pics because it pisses off the GF. Ex doesnt want GF around her kid. Ex doesnt want Dad back, she has pleanty of options in her rotation. Dad needs to tell Ex to stop sending pictures with Ex in them so he can post them on his phone. GF is just a wee bit insecure and doesnt know how to deal with the power flex

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GF, EX wife and pictures.

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I thought this was going somewhere else.

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the only pictures she sends include her, and they are some type of blatantly obvious attention seeking selfie disguised as pictures of the kids, that's definitely a concern and the only valid dislike she could have.

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I agree. If the ex is single and sending pictures of herself that happens to have the kids in it, especially wearing nice dresses or bikinis, it would be normal of the GF to suspect her having different motives. How batshit crazy she reacts to that, depends on how nuts your gf is. A normal person would express concern and have a conversation, but not over react.

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When my ex wife and I split up

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Split2874

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name checks out

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Is that really a big deal? Wondering what the OT thinks

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Its a big deal it worries her. I welcome any and all pictures of my son when he isn't with me. I don't care if my ex is in them or not, it shows my son enjoying his life amd thats all I care about really.

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Bud, let me give you some advice. If you have an ex that is friendly with you, that you have a child with...it is far more conducive to keep a good relationship with hwr than with a jealous Girlfriend. The better the relationship is with the mother of your child, the easier your life will be

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I get this, and it’s great for you and your kid and your ex. But if the ex is high-conflict or attention seeking, or hell bent on running any new woman off, why put a new woman through all that then shite on her for being “jealous?”

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Isn't that the entire point of photos and posts on Facebook, etc?

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Yes, but in this case she is sending them directly to her ex husband on his phone.

Confession time. I’ve been in the “jealous gf” position. Started dating a guy, things were going great. But i started to notice something off about his relationship with his ex soon after. Just about every time i was on the phone with him, he would say “just a sec, it’s my ex calling”, then stay on the line with her and after about 10 minutes on hold i would hang up. When he’d call back, i’d ask “is everything ok?” He would say “Oh, she’s just telling me about what they are having for breakfast/lunch, etc.” I’m like “Ok, i guess it’s good they are still friendly for the sake of the kids.” Or when he and i would be out, she would call and they would talk for maybe 10 minutes. In English. This is notable because they were both from another country but had been here since they were kids and spoke perfect English.

Often our plans would be interrupted because she would call him and say she was dropping off the kids because she wanted to go out or go shopping. Who was i to say he couldn’t spend more time with his kids, right? So i tried to be “cool.” Then, when i started going to his house, i would notice she would just show up, walk in, and go directly to the kids’ rooms, or put food in the fridge. Again, weird, but i tried to be “cool.” The first few times it happened, i tried to introduce myself but she just looked at me and went about her business at the house, ignoring me. She would only talk to him and only in their language. When i told him i thought it was rude and excessive, he would say “But she’s the mother of my kids and the kids come first!”

Then i noticed his family members seemed not to like me. Apparently he told the ex and the ex told them i was “jealous”. I was painted as the psycho gf trying to come between him and his kids. My only regret is not peacing out sooner.

Well clearly it requires good faith on both parts. But being at least cordial with each other pays dividends

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Well clearly it requires good faith on both parts. But being at least cordial with each other pays dividends

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I agree. There’s cordial, friendly even, but there’s also the industrial strength bullshite some people will expect those they claim to love to swallow in the name of “the kids.” Our society has swung from the evil stepparent behavior that led to the bad reputation to “kids come first”. Some people will use this to get away with all kinds of bullshite that doesn’t serve the kids but feeds a need for attention, self-importance, or love of drama. My “Psycho Girlfriend’s Tale” is an example.