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re: 12 Year Old Girl with BPD
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:47 pm to lsunutinno
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:47 pm to lsunutinno
Talk therapy is the best proven technique, but it is significantly more effective for female patients than male. Talk therapy is great for understanding fears, insecurities, and triggers for those feelings that one interacts with in their daily lives. However, that’s often only part of improving one’s situation. People also need to improve their habits and behaviors, not just learn what drives them. Some patients, myself included, need a more active and proactive approach. Talk therapy was useless for me. I needed HELP and guidance. I was barely juggling a life that was actively falling apart, and I needed to learn how to fix my behaviors to stabilize my situation and start addressing mental illness symptoms and problems one at a time.
1
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:47 pm to Leotiger725
There are intense therapy options for these things, these days.
Here is a classice Youtube on one old example
Here is a classice Youtube on one old example
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:49 pm to lsunutinno
quote:
He is either ASPD (AntiSocialPersonalityDisorder) or BPD (BorderlinePersonalityDisorder), but has been 100% noncompliant in any (talk) therapy, so we really don't know which---although they are both equally horrifying.
from what i've read and heard, it seems that a lot of times males get diagnosed with ASPD and women get diagnosed with BPD for very similar symptoms. all cluster B pd's exist on a spectrum anyways though, so labels arent as important as recognizing traits, trends, and symptoms
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:50 pm to Leotiger725
She needs to talk to a therapist, not the run of the mill social worker who has not seen nor dealt with this stuff before. Look for a good one based off someone who has had problems just like this and the parent said it was worth every penny spent. Good luck and don't give up.
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:51 pm to Aubie Spr96
quote:
I tell the story all the time. At 3 yrs old, we told our daughter to clean her room or else we were going to donate all her toys. She looked at us, went to the kitchen, and came back and handed us a trash bag. We packed up her toys and gave them away. You can't parent a child that does that
Kid called your bluff. Sounds like you needed a new carrot/stick model to motivate her. If she can take that kind of internal confidence, drive, and moxy and channel it into something constructive, that’s a kid who could be an unstoppable force as an adult. That’s fortunate 500 CEO, president, inventor, entrepreneur, or druggie burnout. There’s really no in between.
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:51 pm to Bert Macklin FBI
quote:
The only that helped is that she took some DNA test (maybe 23 and me) and found the exact meds she needed to regulate. She has been on those meds for 5 years now without any serious swings in either
Hey Bert do you how the Dr’s connected the 23&Me results with functional medication? I have someone in my life that I care greatly about that struggles with BiPolar Disorder and Mania. Most times I just feel lost in how to help. This could be something that works for them as well and want to look into how to coordinate it all.
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:52 pm to Champagne
I wish it weren't real bro
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:53 pm to Leotiger725
Man that was a tough read, have a 12 year old daughter myself and can't imagine the pain that would cause.
Hopefully getting a diagnosis will be a first step in getting help for you daughter and family. I will definitely be praying for you brother.
Hopefully getting a diagnosis will be a first step in getting help for you daughter and family. I will definitely be praying for you brother.
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:54 pm to Leotiger725
I'm compelled to comment on the OT responses on this thread. Typically, the OT is going to roast anyone posting personal problems.
The OP posting here certainly knows this, but likely out of desperation is seeking input from like minded people.
The OT is consistent in being civil when it comes to children and dogs. We're tough, but our soft spots are obvious.
KUDOS to the OT!
Good luck and God bless to the OP. Some great advice here, hope you can find some relief.
The OP posting here certainly knows this, but likely out of desperation is seeking input from like minded people.
The OT is consistent in being civil when it comes to children and dogs. We're tough, but our soft spots are obvious.
KUDOS to the OT!
Good luck and God bless to the OP. Some great advice here, hope you can find some relief.
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:55 pm to eatpie
quote:thank you
KUDOS to the OT!
I had help of course
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:56 pm to Leotiger725
Sounds like she needs to be committed to a sanitarium.
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:57 pm to kingbob
The patient has to be self aware and want to participate. I'm glad you wanted that for yourself. As of now, my son refuses to participate.
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:57 pm to Leotiger725
Try a morning boot camp with rigorous physical activity and a strict keto diet
Posted on 4/29/24 at 2:59 pm to lsunutinno
Have you asked him why? What does he want to do? Does he notice any problems at all? Sometimes they have to make their bed and lie in it for a while before they realize something is wrong. They need to feel consequences to recognize the need to change.
This post was edited on 4/29/24 at 3:01 pm
Posted on 4/29/24 at 3:01 pm to kingbob
quote:
Kid called your bluff.
We threw the toys away. It was no bluff. You, like everyone else that hasn't dealt with it, have no idea what you are talking about.
If the child doesn't respond to the punishment and correct the behavior, then there is nothing you can do legally as a parent to alter the behavior. The child literally becomes unparentable. You are under the impression that the child is rational, they are not. There was never any reasoning with my daughter. You were wasting your time.
Oh, the school? They don't care. They are there for the normal kids. They just wanted the troubled kids to GTFO. Police? Yeah, forget them too. Unless your kid is killing someone, they just pass the offense along to the parents. Doctors? Yeah right. In Alabama at the age of 13, you are in control of your medical care. So, if the prescribe some medications or therapies, the 13+ year old kid has to agree to participate. Think about that. The medical system expects the irrational child to make rational decisions on their mental health. It's amazingly stupid.
Again, I'm praying for the OP's family and hope that they are able to find the right place to help their daughter.
Posted on 4/29/24 at 3:03 pm to Leotiger725
quote:She's literally mentally ill. It will be helpful over time if you develop the ability to stop cramming your perception of her through a lens of "normal" things and then seeking to label it with such names as "evil".
I am holding out hope, but the truth of the matter is right now she is basically evil. She can't be reasoned with. She will patronize you to avoid addressing anything substantial.
The fact of the matter is you cannot force someone to try and be a decent person if they are hellbent on doing the opposite. I never imagined things would get this bad. I cannot relate at all to her and her behavior, and neither can the rest of my family.
There's a chance that she is a candidate for MDMA-assisted and/or psychedelic therapy.
LINK
Truly sorry the two of you are going through this. I'm adjacent to a less severe case and I see the massive disruption even that causes to all around the person.
ETA: University of Chicago looks like it's currently running a clinical trial with psilocybin and BPD. It might be worth it to try to get her into such a study.
LINK
This post was edited on 4/29/24 at 3:13 pm
Posted on 4/29/24 at 3:03 pm to Leotiger725
Electroconvulsive therapy
Posted on 4/29/24 at 3:03 pm to RandySavage
quote:
have a 12 year old daughter myself and can't imagine the pain that would cause.
What about cheating on her mom with a co-worker and telling the family about it while on vacation?
Posted on 4/29/24 at 3:04 pm to Leotiger725
I assume by BPD, you mean borderline personality disorder. If so, as bad as it feels right now, she can be ok.
The prognosis is better than you might think and it's because she's being treated at a young age. The younger this is addressed, the better the outcome. I've seen many a young girl with these traits grow to become well and functional as they enter adulthood. Even to the point of happy and healthy relationships.
The ones who fair the worst are those who begin treatment as young adults or older. The younger she's treated the better and I promise you, as bad as this is now, she can become healthy. The prognosis right now is actually good.
Keep her in treatment. Keep her with a good therapist and shrink who gets it and by the time she's 20 or so (yes, it may take that long) you'll be amazed at the transformation.
This isn't a life sentence for you, her or your family.
The prognosis is better than you might think and it's because she's being treated at a young age. The younger this is addressed, the better the outcome. I've seen many a young girl with these traits grow to become well and functional as they enter adulthood. Even to the point of happy and healthy relationships.
The ones who fair the worst are those who begin treatment as young adults or older. The younger she's treated the better and I promise you, as bad as this is now, she can become healthy. The prognosis right now is actually good.
Keep her in treatment. Keep her with a good therapist and shrink who gets it and by the time she's 20 or so (yes, it may take that long) you'll be amazed at the transformation.
This isn't a life sentence for you, her or your family.
This post was edited on 4/29/24 at 3:07 pm
Posted on 4/29/24 at 3:08 pm to Leotiger725
Put a foot in her arse
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