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Started By
Message
Wedding vs. Elope - Pro's & Con's
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:16 am
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:16 am
Context - wedding savings for daughter's eventual wedding
4 hours - ceremony / reception
Would you rather spend $10k per hour ($160/minute) on your wedding or take that money and put it towards a new home?
I know Wedding costs can go much, much higher and much, much lower. But, for discussion...
Elope with a nice party for family & friends and chunk of money to kick off life together screams inside my brain.
Learn me your thoughts...
4 hours - ceremony / reception
Would you rather spend $10k per hour ($160/minute) on your wedding or take that money and put it towards a new home?
I know Wedding costs can go much, much higher and much, much lower. But, for discussion...
Elope with a nice party for family & friends and chunk of money to kick off life together screams inside my brain.
Learn me your thoughts...
69
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:19 am to Turf Taint
JOP
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:19 am to Turf Taint
quote:
Learn me your thoughts...
It's really not your decision.
You can give your input, but your daughter will ultimately do what she and her soon to be husband thinks is right.
For context, my FiL cut me a check and said good luck. I covered the rest. It turned out to be about 50/50.
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:20 am to Turf Taint
Tell her she will be divorced within 10 years so take the money
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:20 am to Turf Taint
I think everyone who has ever gotten married says "oh boy if we could do it again we'd just elope and do a small party with friends for 1/10 the cost" yet somehow every year is chock full of extravagant parties and no one seems to follow the advice.
There's probably a nice middle ground to target where you can have a much less formal ceremony at a venue without the entire 30k production and do a party just as grand for about 7k.
There's probably a nice middle ground to target where you can have a much less formal ceremony at a venue without the entire 30k production and do a party just as grand for about 7k.
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:22 am to Turf Taint
Positive:
Elope:
You get married
You don’t spend crazy money
Wedding:
Nothing
Best of both worlds:
Destination wedding with only your closest friends and family.
You get a trip, a party, and the people you actually care about, for far less money.
Elope:
You get married
You don’t spend crazy money
Wedding:
Nothing
Best of both worlds:
Destination wedding with only your closest friends and family.
You get a trip, a party, and the people you actually care about, for far less money.
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:22 am to Turf Taint
My daughters getting to where marriage is being brought up between her and her bf of 6 years and I wish they’d just elope.
He says his family would disown him if he did.
He says his family would disown him if he did.
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:23 am to Turf Taint
quote:
daughter's eventual wedding
What does your daughter want? How much does that factor into your decision to give her money for the wedding?
Further, it’s your money. What kind of wedding do you want?
Most guys here will say elope with the down payment on a house. But we’re all middle aged, older men who have no hopes of magical dreams.
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:27 am to thegreatboudini
quote:
It's really not your decision.
You can give your input, but your daughter will ultimately do what she and her soon to be husband thinks is right.
I know much has changed, but I think the person paying still has the ultimate decision authority.
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:31 am to Turf Taint
n
This post was edited on 8/11/23 at 10:40 pm
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:31 am to Turf Taint
I eloped. My brother did not. On his wedding day, he was not happy. Told me he wish he'd done it my way instead.
Just had a friend's son get married. 250 guests. Big, catered wedding........They live in a trailer and now have a baby on the way.
Just had a friend's son get married. 250 guests. Big, catered wedding........They live in a trailer and now have a baby on the way.
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:32 am to Turf Taint
Waddings are almost a bigger waste of money then funerals..
Fact.
Fact.
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:36 am to Turf Taint
My wife and I eloped in Vegas. Zero regrets.
The kids (both girls) are mostly on their own. I might give them 5k. I'm not paying for some expensive party when I'm trying to save as much as I can for retirement.
They have the rest of their careers to pay that off if they choose to drop 30k+ on a wedding.
The kids (both girls) are mostly on their own. I might give them 5k. I'm not paying for some expensive party when I'm trying to save as much as I can for retirement.
They have the rest of their careers to pay that off if they choose to drop 30k+ on a wedding.
This post was edited on 2/25/23 at 3:34 pm
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:38 am to Turf Taint
Just take Mike Leach’s advice and elope.
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:38 am to Turf Taint
Just tell her to get knocked up and they can save money on a ring too
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:38 am to Thundercles
quote:
I think everyone who has ever gotten married says "oh boy if we could do it again we'd just elope and do a small party with friends for 1/10 the cost
Not me. It was a lot of fun. Great memories.
This post was edited on 2/25/23 at 8:40 am
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:40 am to Turf Taint
You can't decide for others what they envision for their self/future. Also, looking back after experiencing life, it's easy to see the better/more logical answer. Weddings, however, are not logical.
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:42 am to Turf Taint
Why not comprise? Go away to get married and come back and have a reception.
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:44 am to Turf Taint
I’ve been married for 15 years. Our wedding/reception was awesome and a ton of fun.
After seeing what a lot of my younger coworkers are paying for weddings these days I think we would’ve probably eloped in their situation.
After seeing what a lot of my younger coworkers are paying for weddings these days I think we would’ve probably eloped in their situation.
This post was edited on 2/25/23 at 8:46 am
Posted on 2/25/23 at 8:45 am to Turf Taint
I wanted to elope and my wife insisted on a wedding. The minute we got back to the room after the reception, she said you were right…that was a huge waste.
It was a great wedding, with full open bar and a fantastic band. But the money and hassle involved just isn’t worth it imo.
It was a great wedding, with full open bar and a fantastic band. But the money and hassle involved just isn’t worth it imo.
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