re: When you’ve finally had it with a parent

in a calm stern voice tell him point blank and directly

"you do realize it will soon be up to me which nursing home you get put in and whether or not i care to make sure you are treated decently in there?"

it might take a while to sink in, maybe a few days, but he will hear what you said and realize its true. he may not treat you better but he will be less of an arse about it for sure

You are under no obligation to tolerate toxic people who make you unhappy, even if they are close relatives.

My only regret about cutting off contact with some of my family is that I didn't do it sooner. My life is better in every way without them in it.

My mom packed her clothes and moved states to be with another man after 36 years of marriage to my dad. So yeah pretty much at that point.

I cut both my parents off for a while. They were in unhealthy mental places and bringing me to tears in our conversations. I just stopped answering their calls. Nothing official. I am however very happy I made up with them before their deaths.

I guess in a nutshell, take a break if you need to but don't cut them out completely. You'll want to end life on a happy note.

Cut him off. Or at least distance yourself. Life is too short.

Man, I feel for you I was lucky to have great parents. Both are gone now, but stories like yours make me appreciate what I've had.

How much contact do you have with him? I know with toxic people like employers and such that you see every day, things are much better when you get away from it. If you only see him on holidays, it might be better to keep contact.

Talking every few weeks even if it is in person, but especially if is by phone , does not seem like the kind of thing that should impact your day to day peace of mind.

Without knowing the full details, I'd say it might cause more commotion to actively break things off. Other family members might feel like they have to take sides, causing a ripple effect.

No you’re not. Seek therapy

Very true. Great post, but especially the last stage: No matter how f'ed up of a father his dad was, it is the one that will always perplex a man, and yet it will be a mystery for the rest of his days.

I cut off my mother. she was a shite mom. never taught us hygiene. never checked if we did homework. it wasn't until we were grown she wanted to be mom. constantly inserting herself into everything. posting on social media under every. fricking. post. " mommy loves you and misses you". baby talk. " call mommy please" friending every girl i dated as soon as she found out.

I gave her at least 100 verbal requests and warnings to back off and treat me like an adult over the course of 12-15 years.

i started dating 18 months into separation 3 months before divorce court. she did it again and i told her to chill until divorce was final to avoid any unnecessary drama.

she sends me a list like 1- im the mom 2- i dont have to respect your wishes.


I blocked her on social media and blocked her number.

enough was fricking enough.