re: People who cut off their family, what did they do to you?

quote:

---

My father enabled my mother to physically and verbally abuse us growing up and neither have ever admitted wrong doing. In fact, they’ve double downed and said they raised us with love.

Spineless father and a demonic mother.

---

same except the roles were reversed

I was about 6 or 7 years old when I realized that there were many relatives on both sides of my family that were just plain idiots, morons, or trash.
At that point in my life I realized that in order to be successful in life I had to avoid these people.

Drugs

quote:

---

She either has a shitty relationship with her family and therefore hated the fact that he had a good relationship with his. Or she had a good relationship with her own family and hated the fact that his family took time away from hers.

---

Basically, what I have surmised is that she is a loser with a huge inferiority complex, and he's (my BIL) too pathetic to stand up to her. Thus, he's willing to turn his back on his family to keep her happy. Even though he knows his mother/sister haven't actually done anything wrong.

She is someone who wants to have a certain standard of life (but can't afford it) and becomes insanely jealous of others in the family that can live such lifestyle. Stupid things such as being unreasonably angry her MIL seemed more interested/intrigued a trip to Europe my wife and I took vs. a trip she and my BIL's took to Biloxi. From what I can also tell she has no friends of her own (she had to hunt down a friend she had not been close with for a few years to join her sister as one of two bridesmaids in the wedding). As such, she demands 100% attention from my BIL.

The straw that broke the camel's back was when she, out of nowhere, sent my MIL a text explicitly calling my MIL a horrible person and unfit mother unworthy of my BIL. It was akin to a scorched earth breakup text. The curious thing is that no one could figure out what prompted the text because there was no confrontational event that preceded it. My BIL didn't even know she sent the text and was tearfully apologetic to my MIL (his mom) once he found out. After that he moved out of their house for exactly 2 days before agreeing to return under the mandate that he could have little to no contact with his family. So much so that his family has been forbidden from seeing their young child.

Ultimately though, the family being cut off falls on my BIL. He knows his family has done nothing wrong. He even acknowledges as much. Yet, he's so afraid of not being married that he's willing to cut ties with his family. It's a level of pathetic I'm not sure I can ever appreciate. Personally, it doesn't really effect me. But as a parent I hate watching my MIL be so heartbroken by, in effect, losing a child when she didn't actually do anything "wrong", and the child she lost readily admits such.

One of my friends in high school got cut out of the family for stealing tens of thousands from the family business.

As early as five years old I’d tell my parents that one day I’m leaving and that will be the end of our relationship. I still can remember them laughing.

39 now and haven’t seen or spoken to them since I was 16. They actually seem like pretty normal people if you come across them. Well spoken, somewhat intelligent but they live paycheck to paycheck due to pure laziness.

I can handle the laziness but the verbal and physical abuse for years and years just wore me down. Knew at a very young age that it wasn’t normal and I didn’t plan on keeping the cycle going. Pretty much sums it up.

I can see cutting off one family member for good reason. But if someone cuts off their whole family there is a 99.9% chance the one doing the cutting is the problem.

Don't be an a-hole is a good place to start

I cut off my family in November 2019. Mother,brother and two sisters. Dad passed in '84. I catch a lot of grief from friends for disowning them over "politics". It goes beyond that. They are toxic liberal progs. I told them in 2019 that the (D) party had lost their way. I told them I was choosing good and they were choosing evil. I was choosing light and they were choosing darkness. Have nothing in common with my older brother. He's a gay liberal, Berkeley grad and lives in San Francisco. We haven't spoken since 2016. Older sister also gay liberal and lives in Arizona and thinks Katie Hobbs is the cats meow. Younger sister moved to Perth Australia in 1990 and visits the states once every 5 years. Mom has the worst case of Trump Derangement Syndrome of anyone I know. A distant second would be HHTM. It was easy to walk away from this freak show. They don't even know where I live.

quote:

---

I cut off my family in November 2019. Mother,brother and two sisters. Dad passed in '84. I catch a lot of grief from friends for disowning them over "politics". It goes beyond that. They are toxic liberal progs. I told them in 2019 that the (D) party had lost their way. I told them I was choosing good and they were choosing evil. I was choosing light and they were choosing darkness. Have nothing in common with my older brother. He's a gay liberal, Berkeley grad and lives in San Francisco. We haven't spoken since 2016. Older sister also gay liberal and lives in Arizona and thinks Katie Hobbs is the cats meow. Younger sister moved to Perth Australia in 1990 and visits the states once every 5 years. Mom has the worst case of Trump Derangement Syndrome of anyone I know. A distant second would be HHTM. It was easy to walk away from this freak show. They don't even know where I live.

---

Sounds like you did them a favor.