re: My oldest son is leaving for college in a few weeks, those that have gone thru this, how

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stay out of his life as much as possible

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Sorry, you’re parents didn’t love you. Life and being a parent is a huge blessing/gift. You can still have a loving relationship with your child no matter his or her age.

My experience as a parent is that it's constant worry from the time you find out your SO is pregnant, the worry just changes forms/manifest. So from my perspective this sounds normal and recognizing it as a normal emotion can often help in processing. Just be strong, sounds like you're a good parent which is a strong indicator that you have a good kid so the foundation is solid.

You spent their whole life preparing them to make the right choices. Time to let them fly. This is a good moment of parenting. Don’t turn it into a sob fest. Will only make it harder on both.

1. Condoms and talk on responsibility to insure his future and that of his girlfriends.

2. Modern technology allows instant communications, not like the olden days of pay phone or collect call on Sundays. Just send a text every morning to tell him the weather report. It will let him know that you can be on the other end of a text almost instantly if he needs you.

Tell him the truth about life.
It's tough, but the harder the struggle, the greater the reward. So, bite off as much as you can chew, and give it hell.

-Life is never too bad that you should quit, because struggles make you a tougher and better person.
-It's never wrong, or too late, to do the right thing. Living an honest life that you can be proud of who you are makes the journey worth while.
-Make good choices, because bad ones will follow you for a long time.
-You are always welcome home. Your parents love you, support you, and will help you no matter what.
-Go Make us proud. We believe in you.

You should have already given him roots and faith.
So, all that is left is to give him encouragement, support, hope to overcome failures, and that'll let him fly.

Home will feel empty for a while.
But your job is done. His life is in his hands now.
Just as you were when you were 18. He is now. As it should be.

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Where he going?

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Small (6000 or so students) in state school.

You've done your job & it's led up to this.

Let him shine, Pops

How far away is he going? I was wrecked for awhile when my oldest left for LSU even though she was only 30 minutes away.

A down vote?

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Sorry, you’re parents didn’t love you. Life and being a parent is a huge blessing/gift. You can still have a loving relationship with your child no matter his or her age.

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I want them to be strong independent people. If they can operate successfully and have good happy lives if mom and I are gone tomorrow, we have done a good job.

If they can't make a basic like decision without consulting me or need my financial support, I've done a poor job. That's the way your parents were raised and their parents also, it usually worked well.