re: Married people OTOT, how old were you when you married?

As someone who didn't have kids until his 30s, there is diffently advantages to having kids at an early age. Having them out of the house in your early 40s would be amazing.

Got married in college at 20. 16 years and going strong. You will know when she’s the right one and when that happens make sure to keep her

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As someone who didn't have kids until his 30s, there is diffently advantages to having kids at an early age. Having them out of the house in your early 40s would be amazing.

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i'll be 44 when my youngest goes to college. the idea of being a grandfather in my late 40s or early 50s is a fantastic thought.

Married at 28.

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Young kids definitely put a damper on your sex life. But if you marry someone that likes having sex with you it won't last forever. Some married people have good sex lives.

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Exactly, and a youngin' for sure puts a damper on EVERY new parent couple for at least a month or so after the birth, so there's that to look forward to. As far as myself and a handful of my best friends of which I've at least some knowledge of how their marriage's sex life is going because of comments they make, our marriages' sex lives are active.

I know mine is- it's very active, and it's because my wife knows how important sex is to me because I told her and tell her when I feel like there's a glitch in the programming, and I know how important physical and mental affection is for her because she told me and reminds me when I'm shitting the bed. Sexually speaking, she meets the demand (notice that I did not say, "demands") with the supply. And FTR, my marriage/relationship is no spring chicken: Going on 17 years together without any breaks, cheating, affairs, etc. that I know of. There's always been plenty of opportunities, and it hasn't always been easy to close those doors that a woman has left cracked open for me to come inside, but I did close them and that's what matters. Obviously if they were/are there for me, being that my wife has a vagina and tits and looks good, the doors are left wide open for her to step inside each and every day, but if I'm doing the best job that I can be doing as a husband (and that's all you can do) and if I've done a prudent job on finding a good woman who I'm compatible with (i.e., she will meet my sexual needs as long as I meet hers), then she should gladly, readily have sex with me, with all else being equal, e.g., being sick, being tired, being sick & tired, etc. It certainly helps to be giving good sex when you give it if you want to keep getting more of it, and a man who's wife keeps him sexually satisfied is a man who can and willingly will meet all the other demands in life and from his wife. Long story not so short: A piece of advice, OPer, is one that is very well known about, but so rarely practiced: Communication before and during marriage is VITAL. Do not wait around and let the doodoo hit the fan blades before you and/or your woman decide to address a problem or you will be sorry.

I've never understood how ANY man could stay in a marriage, let alone a relationship, where his wife doesn't have sex, give blowjobs, spice things up, etc.: That man is a better man than I, because I couldn't and wouldn't do it. I have to have sex when I need it because it's a huge part of my vitality and happiness as a male, and I've always said to women that if they want to do the absolute worst thing to their husbands that will almost ensure terminal illnesses to her marriage, then forcefully withhold sex from her husband. If he's anything like me- and most men are - then that withdrawal of sex from the relationship will begin to bleed over into causing problems in every other facet of life, and it will happen quickly, and it quite often does and will backfire with shocking ramifications.

Like I said, I've been married for 6 years and we dated for almost 10 before getting married. We didn't want to be married and going to school, etc., we wanted to be young and keep our options open. Had our first child almost a year ago and will probably have more. No major, "hindsight is 20/20" type regrets. I can't say the same for many people that I know who got married too early or on a whim, and the same goes for a child. A piece of advice OPer, make damn sure to address topics like money, kids, finances etc., BEFORE marriage, and if you or your partner ever allude to the idea that the other person will "change" after marriage, then run for your life: No person changes by another human being trying to will them into changing - not a one. In fact, the opposite is what usually happens and folks dig in and become spiteful, at best.

Another piece of advice: Assuming my son had put in lots of time towards building a real relationship that could turn into a lifetime's worth, I would absolutely support him (or my daughter if I were to ever had/have one) moving in with his possible future spouse for a 6 month "Research and Development" period to make sure that he wanted to pull the trigger. By no means would I support an indefinite period of shacking up, but my advice to you OPer is to consider this as an option, but don't plan on making it permanent because that's what a man made of chickenshit does: ride the freeby train with women his whole life.

Oh yeah, and never have a kid before you are good and damned well ready. It's one thing to have an "oops," but it's altogether another one to jump the gun and purposefully have one without thinking it through. In that scenario- and I have seen quite a few- the parents wound up being a shell of themselves for years after, with some never recovering. I could not IMAGINE my life and my marriage being very fulfilling if I had set out to have a child without thinking it through and then finding out just how demanding the shite is. Hell, I thought it through for years, read 50-eleven books on it when she was pregnant, and I STILL didn't know how the biz worked once it got here. It's like reading books on "how to fly a plane" versus actually flying. I wouldn't trade it (having a kid) for THE WORLD, and one reason why is because right now, it is my world: I couldn't trade it in even if I wanted to - not without serious legal and financial ramifications at least. If you and/or your spouse are not fully prepared enough/mature enough/ not having that "good" gut feeling (or worse, having the "bad" one) for the reality that a child= a new reality, then the world inside of your mind, body and soul might very well wind up being a hellish nightmare. I've seen it happen too many times to believe otherwise, and it's usually the 20 something's who make this grave mistake.

Enjoy your youth, be patient, and don't let peer pressure from your people dropping like flies to marriages wind up being what causes you to make what could be a series of the biggest mistakes of your short life here on earth. You'll know when the time right, and if you are sure the time is not right to get married, then you can be sure that the time is most definitely, most assuredly, not right. Remember that, and you will come out far ahead of the people who did not. I 99% guarantee you that.

Nobody should marry before 25. Ever.

22 and again at 76.

married at 20 , august 1969

we would not change a thing

I’m 39, never married. I have friends that got married young and are going on their 2nd and 3rd marriages now. Have freaking kids everywhere. I’ve dated great women, but not jumping into marriage with just anyone like a lot of people do.

30. One of the last of my friends to do it.

I'm glad I waited. I'm financially stable enough (for now) for us to live well and I already have all my toys. Got to live an adult life as a single man for a while and it was fun as hell. Glad it's over though. I wasnt mature enough for marriage in my 20's