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re: How do you Pay out Bonuses to your employee's?

Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:28 am to
Posted by jdd48
Baton Rouge
Member since Jan 2012
24071 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:28 am to
Mine know bonuses are about to be delivered when I setup a potted plant in the hall outside my office.
Posted by Boudreaux35
BR
Member since Sep 2007
22281 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:29 am to
Females, based on looks. Tie breaker is personality and effort beyond looks.

Males, they better have taken me fishing, hunting, golfing or dropped off some good whiskey.
Posted by trillhog
Elite Membership
Member since Jul 2011
19407 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:29 am to
(no message)
This post was edited on 12/21/17 at 9:31 am
Posted by jlovel7
NOT Louisiana
Member since Aug 2014
24261 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:30 am to
We got a flat rate. Taxed.
Posted by ldts
Member since Aug 2015
2938 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:31 am to
I don't have anyone working for me, so I don't have this issue. However, a few years back I did have employees. I bought them all for lunch the last work day before Christmas, and had planned to give them each a bonus at the end. During the lunch, about half of them started griping and complaining about not being on the clock for lunch, so I ended up not giving anyone bonuses. After that, if I'm ever in the position here I have employees, I'm not ever going to go out of my way to be nice or do extra things for them.
This post was edited on 12/21/17 at 9:32 am
Posted by JohnnyKilroy
Cajun Navy Vice Admiral
Member since Oct 2012
41925 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:34 am to
quote:

I don't have anyone working for me, so I don't have this issue. However, a few years back I did have employees. I bought them all for lunch the last work day before Christmas, and had planned to give them each a bonus at the end. During the lunch, about half of them started griping and complaining about not being on the clock for lunch, so I ended up not giving anyone bonuses. After that, if I'm ever in the position here I have employees, I'm not ever going to go out of my way to be nice or do extra things for them.


Petty af baw
Posted by madmaxvol
Infinity + 1 Posts
Member since Oct 2011
22489 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:34 am to
quote:

How do you Pay out Bonuses to your employee's?



I base mine on their mastery of proper grammar.
Posted by Winston Cup
Dallas Cowboys Fan
Member since May 2016
66987 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:35 am to
1 month TD Premium subsription
Posted by LouisianaLady
Member since Mar 2009
83171 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:37 am to
Are their lunches normally off the clock? Seems weird they’d gripe about that in front of you.

This reminds me - I’ve had two different friends have company holiday parties on a Saturday night or Sunday night this year. Is this really common? Even at companies where we had overnight parties, they were always during the week with the next day given off. Even if the party is badass, I don’t know if I’d want to spend my Saturday night with coworkers/bosses.
This post was edited on 12/21/17 at 9:38 am
Posted by soccerfüt
Location: A Series of Tubes
Member since May 2013
76218 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:37 am to
quote:

I usually figure out who has the hottest SO's and go frick them.
A bit orientation ambiguous.

Cue mikelbr

Posted by TheFonz
Somewhere in Louisiana
Member since Jul 2016
23564 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:38 am to
They must come into the office, one by one, and grovel. I expect them to sing me a song that praises me and my benevolence. I then decide the amount of their bonus check based on how impressed I am with their arse-kissing.
Posted by JohnnyKilroy
Cajun Navy Vice Admiral
Member since Oct 2012
41925 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:44 am to
I've only ever been to Saturday night Christmas parties aside from a Friday lunch (with the rest of the day off)
Posted by Napoleon
Kenna
Member since Dec 2007
74908 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:48 am to
The good employees get a VCR, the bad employees get a bath towel.

Posted by Uncle Stu
#AlbinoLivesMatter
Member since Aug 2004
33878 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:51 am to
"bonuses" ?

-or-

hush money?
Posted by deltaland
Member since Mar 2011
103934 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 9:54 am to
Trillhog thinks "I want you to give me a bonus"

Is the same as "I want you to bone us"
Posted by ldts
Member since Aug 2015
2938 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 10:08 am to
quote:

Petty af baw


First, I'm not a baw.

Secondly, it's petty that something nice I tried to do for someone wasn't good enough for them? This wasn't them talking among themselves, they straight up complained to me about it. They never got payed for lunch, and we all usually ate at the same place. The only thing different than any other day was that I was paying for theirs. This wasn't a working meeting or anything different than any other lunch.
This post was edited on 12/21/17 at 10:11 am
Posted by JohnnyKilroy
Cajun Navy Vice Admiral
Member since Oct 2012
41925 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 10:11 am to
Yea it's petty as frick to say you won't ever go out of your way to be nice to a subordinate because of a minor slight you experienced years prior.

Grow up snowflake.
Posted by cgrand
HAMMOND
Member since Oct 2009
50862 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 10:26 am to
we did visa gift cards this year
I can expense it as opposed to doing payroll checks
Posted by devils1854
Franklin
Member since Aug 2014
6464 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 11:01 am to
My bonus was an extra week paid, a new standing desk, and I got my yearly raise 6 months early.
Posted by Boudreaux35
BR
Member since Sep 2007
22281 posts
Posted on 12/21/17 at 11:07 am to
quote:

During the lunch, about half of them started griping and complaining about not being on the clock for lunch, so I ended up not giving anyone bonuses.


I'd have probably gone a different route and given the bonuses with a comment about "maybe this will make up for not being on the clock"....Maybe a subtle suggestion that they check out other businesses about their policy on lunches over the holidays. You know, let them worry about their comments while staring at their xmas tree.
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