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re: Are Many Couples Actually Happy?
Posted on 12/20/21 at 2:56 am to GreenRockTiger
Posted on 12/20/21 at 2:56 am to GreenRockTiger
There is a lot of good advice in this thread. Married 18 years and contemplating going back into the dating pool at this point.
Marriage is both a blessing and a curse at times
Marriage is both a blessing and a curse at times
1
Posted on 12/20/21 at 3:02 am to Crackerj
quote:
Marriage is both a blessing and a curse at times
I think this can be applied to most things. That which gives us great rewards seldom is the path of ease and leisure.
To view the sunrise from the peak first demands you climb the mountain
Posted on 12/20/21 at 3:18 am to High C
quote:
The moral decline has led to marriage really not meaning much anymore.
People have always cheated like crazy.
The only difference now is that people run to social media to talk about it and now it's far easier to divorce your cheating partner.
This post was edited on 12/20/21 at 3:20 am
Posted on 12/20/21 at 5:23 am to LetTheTigerOut
quote:
LetTheTigerOut
Cuck.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 5:47 am to Hoyt
Too many people are ruined by social media and what they see online. People confuse happiness with being happy 24/7 and this picture perfect life with no stress, rainbows, and puppy dogs everywhere. I think too many people believe too much of what they see and must realize that online people only show you what they want you to see. Many are falling into the trap of of this person has picture perfect life and I want that now. Also people are so quick to quit on things that do not go their way immediately. Life is hard sometimes it is not always great and people in marriages need to understand that. My wife and I have a chaotic life right now ,but we are working together to achieve a bigger goal. It is a roller coster where we have ups and downs. We are generally happy ,but we will not be happy in every situation 24/7.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 7:23 am to Hoyt
I don't even know what Happy is. There is no point in your life where you just reach some point where everything is perfect. Life is a continual struggle of peaks and valleys. It's a goal with a long crappy slog towards that goal. Then you reach that goal and feel achievement and happiness but that is short lived. True Happiness only resides in Social Media. It's a made up thing.
People can't just be happy. Even if every need is over provided, they resent it. When you're broke you want to win the lottery. Then you win the lottery and acquire another set of problems. I try and do the best with what I have been given by my maker. There isn't a day that I don't fall short of my own expectations.
My wife and kids aren't the reason I'm not 'Happy', my human condition is. My wife on the other hand, she thinks the social media life is obtainable so she'll probably get bored with me one day and take off for greener pastures. If that does happen, then I'll probably move to Thailand and open a bar that pimps out girls. Or not.
People can't just be happy. Even if every need is over provided, they resent it. When you're broke you want to win the lottery. Then you win the lottery and acquire another set of problems. I try and do the best with what I have been given by my maker. There isn't a day that I don't fall short of my own expectations.
My wife and kids aren't the reason I'm not 'Happy', my human condition is. My wife on the other hand, she thinks the social media life is obtainable so she'll probably get bored with me one day and take off for greener pastures. If that does happen, then I'll probably move to Thailand and open a bar that pimps out girls. Or not.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 7:32 am to OU812ME2
quote:
People can't just be happy.
This I agree with. We didn’t evolve to be “happy”, we evolved to survive. Our current society, with so much sedentary time and so many choices, so much useless information, and so much distraction doesn’t help. If i can find a reasonable amount of peace and satisfaction, i will consider that “happy.”
Posted on 12/20/21 at 7:38 am to elprez00
quote:
I’ve got family friends that were in this boat, wife was super involved in her kids, they never were apart, and then when their youngest left for college they were divorced in a year. They hadn’t been on a trip by themselves for more than a night for over 24 years. It’s like they didn’t even remember why they were married.
I know this is probably not the norm, especially these days, but you've got to put your marriage first, above children.
Also, choose wisely.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 7:38 am to Hoyt
quote:
Do they believe the grass is greener?
Yes, until it's not.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 7:38 am to tiger91
quote:
Its SUPER SUPER FABULOUS not having any kids in the house.
but this is my second marriage. Maybe I chose wisely this time.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 7:49 am to TigerFanatic99
quote:
It is what it is. I've got 40 or 50 more years in this world to get through then it's finally fricking done.
On a more positive note, an asteroid supposedly wiped out the dinosaurs, so maybe another will come and wipe us all out too, stay positive.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 8:00 am to Hoyt
Happy here.
While there are no guarantees in life, I do think there are some simple steps to significantly increase your chances for success.
Choose to date people who have a background and a family that aligns with your culture and beliefs. Spend time with your date’s family, if you are miserable around them you should probably move on.
Obviously you date people you’re attracted to, but make sure you get married for the friendship and the long term goals. This will ensure you enjoy each other’s company and your life goals are in alignment.
Have your own hobbies. Having time to yourself is important. It gives each person the space needed to feel like an individual.
While there are no guarantees in life, I do think there are some simple steps to significantly increase your chances for success.
Choose to date people who have a background and a family that aligns with your culture and beliefs. Spend time with your date’s family, if you are miserable around them you should probably move on.
Obviously you date people you’re attracted to, but make sure you get married for the friendship and the long term goals. This will ensure you enjoy each other’s company and your life goals are in alignment.
Have your own hobbies. Having time to yourself is important. It gives each person the space needed to feel like an individual.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 8:22 am to JustLivinTheDream
quote:
not enough
Speaking for myself that is.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 8:57 am to LetTheTigerOut
quote:
This is a problem shared equally by both sexes. Men also have very unrealistic expectations of marriage, including wanting to be King of their castle and ruling over all from their throne. They put themselves at the center, and everything else, including their wife, is in the periphery.
I couldn't agree more. With most of the men that I know who are unsatisfied in their relationship, this is the issue. I'm sure there are 2 sides, but they have generally unrealistic expectations.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 9:05 am to cssamerican
(no message)
This post was edited on 12/20/21 at 11:00 am
Posted on 12/20/21 at 9:16 am to Hoyt
Bunch of pathetic guys blaming all their problems on women. This place is sad as hell. Marriage is a commitment to your spouse and God. It takes work. Stop being lazy and blaming your spouses.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 9:19 am to Hoyt
Seems like couples in Many seem to be happy. They have the Tamale festival in Zwolle. Not far from Toledo Bend and Nachitoches. Why wouldn't they.
Posted on 12/20/21 at 9:21 am to VernonPLSUfan
quote:
couples in Many
isn't that the swinger capitol of Sabine Parish?
Posted on 12/20/21 at 9:21 am to OU812ME2
quote:
I don't even know what Happy is. There is no point in your life where you just reach some point where everything is perfect.
thats because "happy" does not equal "perfect".
fortunately for myself and my spouse, happiness is a found thing not a wished for thing
put me anywhere, i'll find happiness
Posted on 12/20/21 at 9:34 am to TigerFanatic99
quote:
I've got 40 or 50 more years in this world to get through then it's finally fricking done
Or you could die in an accident at lunch today. Nut up, sad sack.
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