re: Anyone experience douchey coaches in youth rec leagues?

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Bench players 6 thru 9 play a quarter or two quarters at most

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1-2 quarters for a kid that's not capable of really competing is very good.

The biggest issue I've seen in youth leagues is parents who teach their kid that being a bench player means something bad is happening.

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If your paying for the kid to play, they should see some field time. Quit treating rec league like its the fricking Super Bowl. It for exercise and team building.

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See now you are describing how travel ball developed. People got tired of shitty rec leagues so they started this "pay for play" thing where they think just because they paid X amount their kid should be on the field.

Development is not going to happen unless you put in work outside of practice. Teach your children this at a young age and it will pay dividends in the future. I'm not saying it will get them a college scholarship or hell even high school playing time. But what it will teach them is that if you want to be good at something, anything really, you are going to have to put in extra work to be good.

Find a new league for your son that aligns with your views on sports and competition.

When I was a kid the rec leagues had an understanding that 2nd quarter was reserved for the bottom 5-6 kids on each team. The other 3 quarters were played to win. That was a pretty good compromise.

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if your son loves basketball, his development needs to pretty much come on his own or outside of the league play. relying upon "devlopment" in the league play is lazy and a bit of a dad cop out to helping his child get better in a sport if they want to excel and enjoy. chalk it up as a life lesson that the kid needs to work hard and get better. this is meant as very friendly advice.

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this. I dont agree with the OP that you develop during games...you develop during practice and more specifically during individual practice. and i mean by 5th grade....about time they start understanding they need to work harder. I mean they will be trying out for middle school team next year.


OP sounds like he means well though unlike 99% of the people that whine. But you shouldnt expect the coach to punish the better players for being better either. and even he admitted that the coachs kids are better....well thats because in general they spend a lot more time working with their kid than the average father who bitch about playing time does.

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Am I being the douche here? And should just tell my kid he needs to work harder and he isn’t as good?

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Stay out of it! Life isn’t fair and your son needs to learn this life lesson. Don’t be “ that”” parent.

The goal is any sport is to win!! Period!!
Look my stepson son wasnt all that good coming up and played center for the football team and he absolutely hated it. I coached defense and the wife wanted me to play him like the other dads did. I told him make them play you. The best kids practice at home with there DADS! So stop complaining and put in the work with your kid. Not 30 mins or an hour 2 or 3 times a week. You actually have to put in the time, thats your fault if your not doing your part as a dad. Most coaches the more the parent complains the less the kid gets to play. By the rules they only need to get 1 play for the pay to play crowd. Once they get to 7th and 8th grade that shite goes out the window.
Work with your kid and also get him in some classes. Give him a chance, most kids practice year round. I know i practice with mine year round. As a sophomore he started for a pretty good 7a school. He will play both ways this.year. but him playing center and not playing at times made him hungry. That everyone gets a trophy BS needs to stop. Its win or lose end of story. Its competitive and he needs to learn how to compete and put the time in. Thats starts with you as a father.
But at the end of the day i played every kid and when a blowout happened and it happened alot the kids in your sons shoes played most of the game bc i knew that when we played the teams that we had to go through to win state they wouldnt play as much. Really maybe 2 to 5 plays at the most

Hats off to em, I coached T-ball a couple times and wouldn't do it again. Parents either wanted to tell me how to run the show or were expecting me to have their 5 year old kids ready for the call up to the majors. If they wanted to run the show, they should have volunteered. It's all chaos and I'm just trying to keep Little Johnny from knocking your kid out with a bat.

I’ve coached youth sports of all kinds over the years. I will tell you that 10 year old basketball is the hardest to give equal playing time. In a rec league you maybe have two kids that can dribble the ball the full length of the court. Those two kids have to stay on the court. That leaves you rotating 7 or 8 kids in three spots for 4 quarters. If your kid is playing half of the game consider yourself lucky.