I just ate at Red Lobster. Review and pics inside.

So I, along with the rest of the F+D board, always rip on Red Lobster, Olive Garden, Applebees, etc. I, however, have never had the pleasure of dining at a Red Lobster and feel like a fraud in ripping on it without trying it.

I am at a conference this week and as luck would have it, my hotel is next door to a shiny new Red Lobster. I can't wait.


Well, its all over. Got there around 645 and sat at the bar so I could monitor my Texas/UCLA teaser. Had 2 Macallans at hotel bar before I got to RL so I was hungry and feeling good.

Waitress was a cute chick in mid 20s, real world 7, OT 5.5, no makeup on so you could see a bit of an acne problem but IWHI. Tried to snap a pic of her but that would have been a bit much. She was running around the whole time working her butt off but every time she passed me she asked if I was good and if I needed anything, very attentive, she got the 20% tip.

All the staff I saw were very clean cut, managers were walking about, the place seemed to be well run. Was very clean as well.

As you can see they have a great selection of microbrews on tap:



I chose a Sam Adams Boston Lager. Have you guys ever heard of this obscure microbrew? Was pretty good, clean and crisp, I give it a 6/10. Bartender gave me a shitty pour, almost asked to top that thing off properly but I'm not a dick IRL.



My entree came with a salad, I went with the Caesar as most in this thread recommended. It was a pretty average Caesar. Borderline stale croutons but it was tossed with just the right amount of dressing and the lettuce was crisp and fresh tasting, I'll give them credit for that. They also keep sea salt mills and pepper mills at the table which is something I wish more restaurants did so I could add the amount of pepper I wanted. Salad gets a 6/10.

The cheddar biscuits I was anxiously awaiting came with the salad. Honestly, this was the most disappointing part of the meal. They weren't bad but after all the praise in this thread I was expecting better. With a quarter stick of butter per biscuit plus a ton of cheese it should be incredible but they were just OK. Biscuits get 7/10.



Now for the entree. I figured at Red Lobster I should get a lobster dish so I went with some combo that came with a rock lobster tail, garlic butter shrimp on a kabob and shrimp scampi. Sides were a rice pilaf and broccoli.

This is where it all goes really downhill.




The best part of the dish was probably the broccoli, it was cooked properly, not bad at all 7/10. Rice pilaf was about on par with Zatarrain's boxed pilaf, 5/10.

The lobster tasted like it had been microwaved, was lukewarm with consistency of rubber. At least it wasn't drowned in butter and garlic to hide the shittyness of it like the shrimp were... lobster 3/10.

aaaaand the shrimp. Quite possibly the most pathetic excuse for shrimp I have ever had. Captain D's or Long John Silvers would be better. The scampi in that bowl must have come frozen in that shape to fit in that bowl because when I tried to pull one out they all came out and were stuck in pretty much that shape. Completely drowned in butter and garlic which tried to cover up whatever shitty shrimp tastes like. Scampi 1/10

The shrimp on the kabob was a bit better, at least it wasn't drowned and soggy in butter. But still shite shrimp 2/10.

Total with a big beer and generous tip $31. Entree itself was 17.99 I think. That is about 3 times more than it was worth.

Bottom line:
Service 9/10
Cleanliness and atmosphere 7/10 (wasn't too much trash at this location)
Food 2/10

And there you have it. I am now free to rip on Red Lobster all I want because I have experienced it for realz.