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Started By
Message
Just got a bidet
Posted on 5/21/24 at 11:25 pm
Posted on 5/21/24 at 11:25 pm
I am a changed man. Purchased the Alpha Bidet on amazon and installed it tonight. I had read the rave reviews here and other places, and i still feel like it was undersold.
It's a throne for a king. Im gonna have to put these things everywhere. The installation was super easy. My unit has a heated seat, front and rear spray, temp control, pressure control, a dryer, and i dont even know what else it will do.
Might be my favorite tigerdroppings recommendation ever.
It's a throne for a king. Im gonna have to put these things everywhere. The installation was super easy. My unit has a heated seat, front and rear spray, temp control, pressure control, a dryer, and i dont even know what else it will do.
Might be my favorite tigerdroppings recommendation ever.
This post was edited on 5/21/24 at 11:26 pm
38
Posted on 5/21/24 at 11:28 pm to SECSolomonGrundy
Just wait till you take one of those mule shits, that's when you will really be impressed.
Posted on 5/21/24 at 11:28 pm to SECSolomonGrundy
Someone told you to blow it out your arse and you thanked them for suggesting how?
Posted on 5/21/24 at 11:29 pm to SECSolomonGrundy
I hate those things. Terrible design.
I mean who wants to bend over that far to get a drink of water.
I mean who wants to bend over that far to get a drink of water.
Posted on 5/21/24 at 11:29 pm to SECSolomonGrundy
Congratulations and welcome to civilization.
Posted on 5/21/24 at 11:30 pm to SECSolomonGrundy
Toto man here. I'll never go back. I eventually plan to get an electrician to install a plug next to every shitter in my casa. It's not a true Bidet, but it gets the job done. Currently only have a bidet in the master.
Posted on 5/21/24 at 11:34 pm to HerkFlyer
I've got a friend who is very interested in this. Can you give me, I mean him a link?
Posted on 5/21/24 at 11:36 pm to SECSolomonGrundy
quote:
My unit has a heated seat, front and rear spray, temp control, pressure control, a dryer, and i dont even know what else it will do.
We may not win the next war, but dammit......we will have clean arseholes right up until we're back to wiping with corn cobs!
Posted on 5/21/24 at 11:37 pm to SECSolomonGrundy
Bidets aren’t all that. I prefer TP then clean with flushable wipe. I’m also not fat, if that matters.
Posted on 5/21/24 at 11:37 pm to SECSolomonGrundy
How does your wife's boyfriend feel about it?
Your breakfast will probably taste different from here on out
Your breakfast will probably taste different from here on out
Posted on 5/21/24 at 11:44 pm to EFHogman
This is the one I have. It's great because it has the heater built in. Some models require a hot water source. Ain't nobody got time for that.
Another great feature is the lid auto opening. Nothing like walking into the bathroom in a half asleep stupor and the lid just opens for you. Not to mention the a-hole spray down. I tell my single friends to get one just to make sure they're not gay before they get married. It shouldn't feel so good.
Another great feature is the lid auto opening. Nothing like walking into the bathroom in a half asleep stupor and the lid just opens for you. Not to mention the a-hole spray down. I tell my single friends to get one just to make sure they're not gay before they get married. It shouldn't feel so good.
This post was edited on 5/21/24 at 11:53 pm
Posted on 5/22/24 at 12:44 am to SECSolomonGrundy
I love that people are waking up to this.
I have been saying this on here for like 3-4 years.
It’s a life changer.
Wait till you use one frequently and then also can wet toilet paper with water without one and then you have to shite and only have dry toilet paper. You feel quite dirty
I have been saying this on here for like 3-4 years.
It’s a life changer.
Wait till you use one frequently and then also can wet toilet paper with water without one and then you have to shite and only have dry toilet paper. You feel quite dirty
Posted on 5/22/24 at 12:50 am to SECSolomonGrundy
quote:
Alpha Bidet
“How do we get men to be cool with jetting water up their asses more?”
“Just slap Alpha on that shite, case closed”
Humbly wipe your arse the way God intended, baw.
Posted on 5/22/24 at 12:59 am to hometownhero89
I used to think they were ridiculous. Recovering from level 3 back fusion surgery changed my mind.
Posted on 5/22/24 at 1:01 am to Purplehaze
That is a fair reason to use one.
Posted on 5/22/24 at 1:09 am to SECSolomonGrundy
first tiime I went to Europe I had no clue what a bidet was. Got to the motel in Paris and told my wife these Europeans got their shite together they have a device that washes your shoes. Just stick your shoe in there and it washes them clean. Luckily my wife at the time was not raised in the backwoods of southern Louisiana and gave me the details of what this incredible shoe washing device actually was. True story and yes I am now more cultured than I used too be.
Posted on 5/22/24 at 1:09 am to SECSolomonGrundy
I could understand why women would like it.
Posted on 5/22/24 at 1:10 am to hometownhero89
quote:
Humbly wipe your arse the way God intended, baw.
Those new flusable wet wipes they have now have been game changers.
Posted on 5/22/24 at 1:29 am to Clark14
Looks to me either I’m going to be wiping my arse or drying my arse. Taking a dump is taking a dump. That’s one reason we take a bath or a shower is to take care of the rest. But far be it from me to tell someone not to jet water up their butthole if that’s their thing. To each their own I suppose.
Posted on 5/22/24 at 2:14 am to Clark14
There seems to be some confusion here regarding the physics of how a bidet works.
The water of the bidet is NOT sprayed inside your rectum. It is merely used to spray off the stubborn poo that loiters around the entrance to your anus.
Hope this helps to clear up any misunderstandings.
The water of the bidet is NOT sprayed inside your rectum. It is merely used to spray off the stubborn poo that loiters around the entrance to your anus.
Hope this helps to clear up any misunderstandings.
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