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re: What's your most desperate hookup story?

Posted on 5/8/24 at 1:42 pm to
Posted by Rambler
NWA
Member since Jan 2011
1207 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 1:42 pm to
Not sure yet; I'll know more next week.
Posted by Warmouth
Member since May 2024
28 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 1:43 pm to
OP wins.

Reconnect with a gal I went to college 7 years ago through Facebook. She was the hottest gal at my college. Just beautiful. I flew to Chicago to see her. She had gained some weight, not as hot, and had a shitty job. But I did not care. First night I am sleeping in her bed and I make my move. I do some stuff but she shuts me down. The next night we go to her Aunt’s house and the gal said we are spending the night there. I was like WTF. I was sleeping alone in a twin size bed in a strange bedroom alone. I left the next day and even though I was invited I never hung out with that gal again.
Posted by Jon A thon
Member since May 2019
1676 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 1:52 pm to
quote:

How did she Piss the bed from a dry handy?


That was post hookup passed out. She also walked out of my room topless to a living room full of friends, haha. Didn't phase her, just said hi. Classy
This post was edited on 5/8/24 at 1:53 pm
Posted by redstick13
Lower Saxony
Member since Feb 2007
38605 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 1:53 pm to
Can’t top that but one of the funniest was when I was in high school. Was at the state livestock shows in Baton Rouge and a friend and me managed to get into Texas Club and go home with two LSU girls of average looks. Good night until we were woken up the next morning by two extremely pissed off girls kicking the 2 of us of the apartment and threatening to call the cops because her pet fish was dead.

Turns out my drunk buddy in the heat of the moment the night before used the girls fish bowl to dispose of his gum and the fish ate it.
This post was edited on 5/8/24 at 1:58 pm
Posted by chili pup
Member since Sep 2011
2795 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 1:55 pm to
quote:

I haven't heard from her since and I can't find her on social media.

Did you think to try the prison again to see if she was there once more?

Also did she look like this?



This post was edited on 5/8/24 at 1:56 pm
Posted by tigerinexile
NYC
Member since Sep 2004
1274 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 1:58 pm to
Real life George Costanza
Posted by blue_morrison
Member since Jan 2013
5142 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 2:04 pm to
quote:


I feel like you just wanted to tell your story about fricking a Canadian prisoner


To be fair...a good story right out of the gate.
Posted by WaterLink
Baton Rouge
Member since Sep 2015
17334 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 2:16 pm to
I have a followup question OP, do they mandate contraception during these visits? Did YOU use protection? What if the prisoner gets knocked up during a conjugal visit?
Posted by Godfather1
What WAS St George, Louisiana
Member since Oct 2006
79935 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 2:18 pm to
quote:

LSU Grad Alabama Fan


You pay for pussy, don’t you? “Splenda Daddy”?
Posted by makersmark1
earth
Member since Oct 2011
15975 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 2:19 pm to
So I was in a monogamous relationship with my right hand, ……
Posted by jizzle6609
Houston
Member since Jul 2009
4291 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 2:22 pm to
quote:

It's an apartment building on site at the prison. The prison guards just call you 3 times a day over the course of 3 days.


You know Cuck Canuck takes advantage of this at the mens prison.
This post was edited on 5/8/24 at 2:23 pm
Posted by Gabapentin
Member since Mar 2022
347 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 2:27 pm to
Met a chick online in a chat room around 2000. Talked for months, exchanged pictures, did the dirty talk stuff etc. After awhile she really wanted me to come visit her.... she lived in MARYLAND. I said okay I'm down, she bought my plane tickets too. I flew out and she was a little bigger than the pictures showed.. but I still hit it. Went home and talked some more, she REALLY was in to me and me not so much but I still had a little fun talking. We drifted apart for awhile and reconnected 2 years later. I flew out again and smashed it, she had gained even more weight by then ROFL. After that I just got on the chat room less and less till it eventually ended. She's now married to some sucker. I dodged a bullet and got to get free sex. frick it, worth it.
Posted by KAHog
South Trough
Member since Mar 2013
2406 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 2:29 pm to
quote:

livestock shows


quote:

two LSU girls


Did they win?
Posted by jeffsdad
Member since Mar 2007
21491 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 2:39 pm to
quote:

Man slaughter


One of the worst kinds of slaughter
Posted by GrizzlyAlloy
Member since Aug 2020
1675 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 2:56 pm to
After high school, 2 of my buddies decided to join the army. We wanted to take a trip before they left and booked a cruise. The problem was, the timing of everything had us on a cruise in November. The boat was a ghost town. After striking out with the female crew members we were desperate. One night walking the halls to go get something to eat we see a late 40s/early 50s woman go into a room with a married couple. 10 mins later we are on the way back with some pizza and she gets in the elevator with us. I joked with her and said we saw you going in the room for a threesome. She said yea, but I decided i wasn't into it. I said well, you want to have one with us? She said yes. We didn't to it all together. I hit it first tho.
Posted by HueyLongJr
Mamou
Member since Oct 2007
542 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 2:56 pm to
quote:

free sex.


Plane tickets?
Posted by Stealth Matrix
29°59'55.98"N 90°05'21.85"W
Member since Aug 2019
7929 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 2:57 pm to
quote:

What was she in prison for?

manslaughter

This dude wins the thread he started
Posted by Loup
Ferriday
Member since Apr 2019
11450 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 2:58 pm to
was in a slump and got on Tinder. Met a pretty hefty gal and went home with her. Went take a leak before smashing and there was a turd in the toilet. No TP anywhere to be seen. Gave it hell and hauled arse.

I was never much of a hookup guy. Only 2 or 3 one night stands/bar hookups in my life. Usually kept them around for a month or two until one of us got annoyed with the other. Had a few 2-4 year relationships mixed in.

This post was edited on 5/8/24 at 3:00 pm
Posted by hubertcumberdale
Member since Nov 2009
6538 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 2:59 pm to
quote:

manslaughter



i bet that was the freakiest bang of your life tho
Posted by deltaland
Member since Mar 2011
90878 posts
Posted on 5/8/24 at 2:59 pm to
Once brought back a drunk chick who offered sex in exchange for a cheeseburger from room service at my hotel. But she demanded I use a condom and I didn’t have one and all nearby convenience stores were closed. So I used a piece of cellophane from the burger wrapper and one of her ponytail holders to keep it on
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