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Started By
Message
re: Do you feel like you sacrificed your personality for your wife, family, career?
Posted on 5/9/23 at 10:35 am to StringedInstruments
Posted on 5/9/23 at 10:35 am to StringedInstruments
Why not listen to metal when you work out?
Posted on 5/9/23 at 10:38 am to AwgustaDawg
quote:
."he/she is seeing someone while he/she is doing whatever"
that thought never crosses our minds
Posted on 5/9/23 at 10:43 am to StringedInstruments
I had a career making a ton of money. It is what it is
Posted on 5/9/23 at 10:48 am to StringedInstruments
quote:
I used to be fun.
quote:
I was into horror movies, rock and metal music, and video games.
These 2 things only go together if you're a 15 year old boy.
And even then, the girls aren't going to like you.
Posted on 5/9/23 at 10:49 am to buffbraz
quote:
Pantera/Metallica show this summer.
Where, I must know
Posted on 5/9/23 at 10:52 am to LaLadyinTx
quote:Grown adults don't watch horror movies, listen to rock music, or play video games?
These 2 things only go together if you're a 15 year old boy.
What are you talking about?
quote:And yet, he got married liking those things.
And even then, the girls aren't going to like you.
You're just full of awful and flat out wrong takes it seems.
Posted on 5/9/23 at 10:53 am to StringedInstruments
Nope. Maybe that was the case as I busted my arse in college and dental school and as I started building my career.
But by my early 30s I was buying more guitars, started racing dirt bikes and hauling my oldest kid to the track with me every weekend, did a ton of fishing, did track days on sport bikes with my kid when he was a teenager, etc. Wife wasn’t much into any of that so she sat home with her daughter most of the time.
But by my early 30s I was buying more guitars, started racing dirt bikes and hauling my oldest kid to the track with me every weekend, did a ton of fishing, did track days on sport bikes with my kid when he was a teenager, etc. Wife wasn’t much into any of that so she sat home with her daughter most of the time.
Posted on 5/9/23 at 10:54 am to AwgustaDawg
quote:
good advice...and be open minded. I would have never dreamed I would enjoy a good Rom-Com...in fact I was actively trying to get laid as often as possible when Dirty Dancing was in theaters and I had to see that damned movie so many times I can repeat it line for line to this day...and had to pretend to like it. My first date with my wife was to a company christmas party followed up by "Scrooged"...there is no way I would have gone to that movie by choice...but I wanted to spend more time with her and it was worth the "sacrifice". It is now a holiday tradition in our family...had it not been for our meeting and going on this trip together that tradition may well consist of watching "Die Hard" in deer camp with a couple of buddies swilling cheap whiskey and contemplating life....the alternative is not as attractive as it sounds LOL...
I saw a grief therapist for some months after I lost my mom. The wife, family, friends, church, all provided comfort but it got to where I needed professional help. Never thought I would, but I did. Glad I got the help too. But she is a marriage counselor as well and she said that one of the main things she see's is that people are selfish (breaking news). They want to do the things they want to and if they don't get to, are unhappy. She said so many marriage mates don't take the time/care to realize the support the other mate needs.
Fortunately me and the wife were already doing that but it's true. Like I say, we don't have kids and a lot of our interests are the same. But I love golf and collect sports cards/memorabilia and I have never once been made to feel bad about going golfing or buying some item. Her thing is Crossfit. We used to do it together but I hurt my back so I now despise it But she loves it. She had her first competition a month ago and I loved going and watching her. If it makes her happy, then I'm happy.
We've been married 8 years now and I haven't raised my voice to her one time. Haven't had a reason to. I told her when we were getting married that I just never want to argue. My dad was a complete a-hole to my mom my whole childhood. Yelled, screamed, cussed and was physical with her. I wanted to be the complete opposite of him, and I feel like so far I have been. I know she is my ride or die so one way I try to show appreciation is by never making her feel bad. It's made my life easier by doing that.
Posted on 5/9/23 at 11:05 am to StringedInstruments
quote:
My wife doesn’t like horror movies, rock or metal music, or video games.
I made it a point for years to do everything my wife said she wanted to do, get her the things that she wanted. Tom petty died and I never saw him in concert, and I decided I’d go see the shows I wanted to see. So I bought 4 tickets to see whiskey myers at the varsity in BR. Told her to pick which friends she wanted to go with. She said to me, in a very demeaning way, “why did you buy that stupid shite? I don’t want to listen to that shite and all you did was waste money”.
As bad as that statement was, the part about wasting money was her naturally assuming that I wasn’t going to go because she didn’t want to. Me and three buddies went. Absolutely great show and a damn good time with my friends. I decided then that I was going to do the things I wanted to do. I’ve since bought a camp, a boat, started school again, went to see a Clapton show. I still love my wife and she was in some weird place then apparently, but I decided I had to stand my ground and take care of myself. And so I do.
Posted on 5/9/23 at 11:10 am to Gee Grenouille
The things that have changed for me since I’ve gotten married and have a kid on the way are I don’t spend near as much time in bars or drinking and I don’t gamble near as much as I used to. I’ve also found I’m much more motivated to be successful in my career.
I miss those nights where I could walk home at 1am piss drunk but I think I always knew that couldn’t last forever so I tried to enjoy it while I could do it.
Marriage and having a child on the way has in a lot of ways made me a much healthier person mentally and physically.
I miss those nights where I could walk home at 1am piss drunk but I think I always knew that couldn’t last forever so I tried to enjoy it while I could do it.
Marriage and having a child on the way has in a lot of ways made me a much healthier person mentally and physically.
Posted on 5/9/23 at 11:25 am to LaLadyinTx
quote:
These 2 things only go together if you're a 15 year old boy. And even then, the girls aren't going to like you.
This attitude causes relationships to fail.
ETA: I think my wife’s reality shows and Instagram influencer follows are stupid, but she likes them and they’re harmless so I don’t stand in her way. Dudes liking video games or whatever is the same as long as they aren’t taking away from things that matter.
This post was edited on 5/9/23 at 11:29 am
Posted on 5/9/23 at 11:45 am to StringedInstruments
There are some things I would do differently, for sure.
Posted on 5/9/23 at 11:48 am to StringedInstruments
She's definitely getting boned by the man of her dreams. Sorry it wasn't you.
Posted on 5/9/23 at 11:52 am to RogerTheShrubber
quote:
ut I would as rather go to an event with her than an acquaintance
Depends on the event: Pantera with the buddies, neighborhood party with the wife.
Posted on 5/9/23 at 11:53 am to fallguy_1978
quote:
It's time for a mullet and a Corvette.
I don’t need a vette, but life did get better since growing a mullet a year ago. Next week is 15 years of marriage
This post was edited on 5/9/23 at 11:54 am
Posted on 5/9/23 at 11:57 am to StringedInstruments
quote:
I was into horror movies, rock and metal music, and video games. I don’t really do any of them anymore.
Congrats, youre a grownup now
As always, the Bible could have guided you in this
quote:
When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
Posted on 5/9/23 at 12:16 pm to StringedInstruments
I will never give up Metal for anyone.
Posted on 5/9/23 at 12:28 pm to Epic Cajun
quote:
You should really take some time for yourself, I hang out with friends without my wife at least once a month. And we socialize together with friends every weekend.
This should be the correct answer. You have time for you once a month or so and she does as well. It's healthy for a relationship to not depend on each other for everything.
Posted on 5/9/23 at 12:31 pm to Hetfield
quote:
I will never give up Metal for anyone.
quote:
Hetfield
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