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re: Who here was whipped as a child but doesn't whip their own children now?
Posted on 8/15/18 at 11:58 am to TheCaterpillar
Posted on 8/15/18 at 11:58 am to TheCaterpillar
quote:
And I always thought of my mom as the "mean one" and wouldn't take her yelling at me seriously because she did it too much. If my dad would raise his voice at all, I would tremble, but my dad never hit me at all. He picked his battles way better as well.
This is the basis for why the single mom culture is ruining young men.
1
Posted on 8/15/18 at 11:59 am to toosleaux
didn't spank mine that much. a few isolated instances.
old man used to advertise that arse whipping too. you know. snapping the belt all the way up the stairs.
old man used to advertise that arse whipping too. you know. snapping the belt all the way up the stairs.
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:00 pm to PrivatePublic
I don’t consider it abuse (unless it’s done Adrien Peterson style) I just consider it lazy parenting. View it in the same vein as putting kids in front of tablets or tv all the time. Is it abuse? No. Is it the lazy/fast/easy way out? Yes
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:02 pm to shel311
quote:
Hitting your kid is also just a short term fix.
I forged my dads name on a report card once. I say once because the arse beating I got for doing that made me never want to do it again.
I never drank or did drugs in high school because one time I was with some friends who stole some beer and my dad knocked the crap out of me. I never wanted to touch it after that.
I smarted off to my mom once. You know why I only did it once? Because my dad heard me and proceeded to whip my tail.
Key word in those moments. Once
My mother was more lenient. I ran all over her.
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:05 pm to PrivatePublic
quote:
Where does an open hand swat on a toddler's behind fall?
quote:
The consensus in these threads is that parents consider it to be discipline, and non parents who don't need to be parents to understand consider it abuse.
I haven't seen that in this thread. What I have seen is folks saying hitting a kid with a belt or something is ineffective and goes against their morals.
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:05 pm to beebefootballfan
quote:Yea, short term fix was probably not the right wording. I moreso meant the portion after I said that incorrect remark.
I forged my dads name on a report card once. I say once because the arse beating I got for doing that made me never want to do it again.
I never drank or did drugs in high school because one time I was with some friends who stole some beer and my dad knocked the crap out of me. I never wanted to touch it after that.
I smarted off to my mom once. You know why I only did it once? Because my dad heard me and proceeded to whip my tail.
Key word in those moments. Once
My mother was more lenient. I ran all over her.
I think my general reply was also tailored more towards younger kids as well.
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:07 pm to PrivatePublic
quote:
The consensus in these threads is that parents consider it to be discipline, and non parents who don't need to be parents to understand consider it abuse.
That seems to be the opposite of what is said... most parents say they rarely if ever spank their kids.
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:07 pm to beebefootballfan
There is this weird idea that if you don't spank your kids you are somehow lenient.
I'm pretty strict with my daughter without ever spanking her.
I'm pretty strict with my daughter without ever spanking her.
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:10 pm to Displaced
quote:
This is the basis for why the single mom culture is ruining young men.
Huh? Please explain.
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:10 pm to shel311
quote:
shel311
Oh I know just giving you a hard time.
I rarely spank. My daughter has to really disobey me multiple time to get that.
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:10 pm to TheCaterpillar
Idk why you're getting down voted to hell, you're not wrong.
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:11 pm to toosleaux
Two of my asssholes(my son and youngest daughter, who's a diabolical future inmate) will laugh and mock me if I just fuss, so a swift solid smack on the leg or back fixes that shite.
The other two girls will burst into tears and run find a bathroom or closet to cry when scolded. No spankins necessary.
The other two girls will burst into tears and run find a bathroom or closet to cry when scolded. No spankins necessary.
This post was edited on 8/15/18 at 12:13 pm
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:13 pm to here4thepopcorn
Without a strong male presence in the home, Young men generally grow up without discipline or respect for authority.
Teenage boys do not fear reprocussions from their mother. They just don't.
Teenage boys do not fear reprocussions from their mother. They just don't.
This post was edited on 8/15/18 at 12:14 pm
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:16 pm to CoachChappy
quote:
Children learn to begin manipulating their surroundings at about 6 mos. By 12 months, they start understanding relationships and boundaries.
There is a reason many parents call it the terrible 2s. These parents didn't instill any discipline or boundaries for these kids. They are now mobile, verbal, and have an understanding that there are on consequences for their actions.
Yes, all of this supports reprimanding children and teaching them right from wrong, not necessarily spanking.
quote:
Also, spanking at a young age is not the same as with an 8 year old.
I hope not. Of course, by age 8, I would hope that there would be more effective methods of disciplining a child than spanking.
quote:
A little pop on the diaper
Good lord.
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:16 pm to Displaced
quote:
Without a strong male presence in the home, Young men generally grow up without discipline or respect for authority.
Teenage boys do not fear reprocussions from their mother. They just don't.
I can follow that. I am a single mom (but father is in the situation). My ex was raised by only his mother and I 100% agree.
I always hear the # 1 role model to a child is the same gender parent.
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:23 pm to toosleaux
I was whipped once by my mom and she quickly realized that wasn’t gonna work. She couldn’t pull off the hardass vibe she tried to portray. All my dad had to do was raise his eyebrows to me one time and I knew not to cross him.
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:25 pm to Mo Jeaux
quote:And what does reprimanding an 18 month to a 5 year old look and sound like without a little spanking?
Yes, all of this supports reprimanding children and teaching them right from wrong, not necessarily spanking.
"No, Aiden, don't do that. Please stop."
This post was edited on 8/15/18 at 12:26 pm
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:26 pm to CoachChappy
quote:
and what does reprimanding an 18 month to a 5 year old look and sound like?
"No, Aiden, don't do that. Please stop."
Yes, because that's the only alternative to physically hitting them.
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:26 pm to toosleaux
quote:
Who here was whipped as a child but doesn't whip their own children now?
Me.
As I kid, I could tell the beatings I took were primarily out of anger. It was not to teach me a lesson, though i’m sure my dad was raised to think it was. The only lesson I learned was my dad was a volatile a-hole who loved to beat his kids when he was angry at something we did. I made the decision that I would try teaching my kids right from wrong using a different technique - reasoning with them. Part of the reasoning was to explain the unpleasant consequences that would follow if they failed to behave. I always followed through - I never threatened them with consequences I wasn’t prepared to administer immediately.
All three sons are now very reasonable, emotionally sound occasional gentlemen.
This post was edited on 8/15/18 at 12:46 pm
Posted on 8/15/18 at 12:26 pm to Houma Sapien
quote:
You realize this can be accomplished without the spanking part, right?
Sure do, I did it last night. That's because I instilled a little fear early on.
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