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Started By
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What would you do with stolen sex toys? Smell them? Lick them? Use them?
Posted on 4/16/21 at 7:42 am
Posted on 4/16/21 at 7:42 am
quote:
A Tyrone man is facing burglary charges after police say he broke into a home and stole $700 in cash, bank cards and various sex toys. Michael Holden, 37, has been charged with burglary, criminal trespass and theft by unlawful taking. The burglary reportedly happened April 6 on West 11th Street in Tyrone. The resident told police she had counted out $700 in cash the evening of April 5 to pay rent before taking sleep medication and falling asleep on her couch. When she woke up around noon April 6, she told police the cash was missing, along with various bank cards and sex toys valued at around $160.
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Posted on 4/16/21 at 7:43 am to arseinclarse
That guy's head looks like a dildo itself.
Posted on 4/16/21 at 7:43 am to arseinclarse
For one, I’d probably not tell anyone that they were stolen. Just go buy some more.
Posted on 4/16/21 at 7:44 am to VolsOut4Harambe
He could have found better frames to fit his face. He probably creeped the optician out too.
This post was edited on 4/16/21 at 7:45 am
Posted on 4/16/21 at 7:45 am to patnuh
I’d likely see how much mikelbr would buy them for from me.
Posted on 4/16/21 at 7:45 am to arseinclarse
Holy frick! It's mega mind!
Posted on 4/16/21 at 7:45 am to arseinclarse
quote:
he broke into a home and stole $700 in cash, bank cards and various sex toys.
Posted on 4/16/21 at 7:51 am to arseinclarse
quote:
sex toys valued at around $160.
So 2 vibrators?
Posted on 4/16/21 at 7:54 am to arseinclarse
Is that Squidward?
Posted on 4/16/21 at 7:55 am to arseinclarse
quote:
stole $700 in cash, bank cards
This seems like enough to get the police involved.
quote:
various sex toys.
This seems like somebody wanted the police to know she was DTF.
Posted on 4/16/21 at 8:00 am to arseinclarse
He doesn’t look like a Tyrone.
Posted on 4/16/21 at 8:00 am to arseinclarse
Check out the big brain on Brad.
Posted on 4/16/21 at 8:02 am to arseinclarse
quote:
stole $700 in cash, bank cards and various sex toys.
My man just made a supply run for a Tinder match.
Posted on 4/16/21 at 8:06 am to baldona
quote:
quote: sex toys valued at around $160. So 2 vibrators?
Adam and Eve has better prices than that.
Ever do late night infomercials?
This post was edited on 4/16/21 at 8:16 am
Posted on 4/16/21 at 8:08 am to arseinclarse
Posted on 4/16/21 at 8:09 am to arseinclarse
This story doesn't really pass the smell test 
.
So this dude magically shows up and robs her house the night that she intentionally counted out $700 for rent and took a sleeping pill? Even without the sex toys it feels made up. Throw in various buttplugs and bad dragons and you have a plan to stretch out not paying rent this month. Wonder if this poor dude was bribed with sex and then made to be the goat. Meth probably involved too.
. So this dude magically shows up and robs her house the night that she intentionally counted out $700 for rent and took a sleeping pill? Even without the sex toys it feels made up. Throw in various buttplugs and bad dragons and you have a plan to stretch out not paying rent this month. Wonder if this poor dude was bribed with sex and then made to be the goat. Meth probably involved too.
Posted on 4/16/21 at 8:10 am to drdoct
It is funny how you can tell who the OP is by reading thread titles. I read this one and said to myself that this had to be an arse thread.
Posted on 4/16/21 at 8:15 am to arseinclarse
quote:
What would you do with stolen sex toys?
That depends on who you steal them from.
Posted on 4/16/21 at 8:17 am to arseinclarse
The dudes name is Michael, the city is Tyrone guys 
Posted on 4/16/21 at 8:30 am to arseinclarse
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