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Posted on 1/13/16 at 1:04 pm to X123F45
quote:
When I was in my third year of college, I was messing around with this sexy little goth who was more lesbian than straight. One night her friend joined and about three hours into the night, her friend got her period. Rather than ending the party, things got real dark real fast.
We started smearing the blood on our hands and spanking each other and drawing things with the blood all over each other. Pentagrams, random Celtic runes, whatever we could think of. And as soon as the things were drawn... We licked them off.
Whenever I hear ANYONE brag about the wild crazy sex they have had... I can quite confidently say they may as well be amish.
Posted on 1/13/16 at 1:04 pm to X123F45
I've had lots of good times, but not THAT good of a time
Posted on 1/13/16 at 1:20 pm to cdaniel76
quote:
He was the 3rd baseman, numbnuts!
Dammit
Posted on 1/13/16 at 1:36 pm to Hammertime
quote:
Evidently sex swings shouldn't be held in place by sheetrock.
So she couldn't find the stud?
Posted on 1/13/16 at 1:43 pm to Hammertime
Hammertime
Posted on 1/13/16 at 1:53 pm to FlappingPierre
Back in the day between marriages I was trolling the MILFs pretty hard. Within 6 months had 2 different ones that lost control and pissed all over me when they orgasmed cowboy style. Never have figured that out. I know it's pretty lame compared to previous posts. Maybe if they had shite all over me at the same time it would be hall of fame material.
Posted on 1/13/16 at 2:00 pm to X123F45
quote:
When I was in my third year of college, I was messing around with this sexy little goth who was more lesbian than straight. One night her friend joined and about three hours into the night, her friend got her period. Rather than ending the party, things got real dark real fast.
We started smearing the blood on our hands and spanking each other and drawing things with the blood all over each other. Pentagrams, random Celtic runes, whatever we could think of. And as soon as the things were drawn... We licked them off.
Whenever I hear ANYONE brag about the wild crazy sex they have had... I can quite confidently say they may as well be amish.
Was this in a bed? How was cleanup?
Posted on 1/13/16 at 2:35 pm to vol-boy
In college at MSU in room a girl home from a bar and after doing the deed I get a call from a friend needing a ride from a house party. I put my clothes on to go get him, leaving the girl at my apt. Ended up forgetting about her and getting drunk at the party, met another girl and took her back to my place. Walked in my room with the new girl and, well let's just say the other girl wasn't too happy. Tried to work it into a threesome...they both just left pissed off.
Me and my friends took my ski boat out one time and one of my friends girlfriends brought her friend along. Ended up hooking up with her on the boat and she tells me she wants to frick right now. So we get ready to go and I drop my friends off at the truck to back up the trailer, drive the boat to the middle of the lake and frick her right on the floor of my boat. They were all laughing when I got back to the landing
Me and 2 friends picked up a girl from a bar who proceeds to pass out on my back seat so we decide to snort coke off of her tits. Then she woke a couple hours later and we ran a train on her
Me and my friends took my ski boat out one time and one of my friends girlfriends brought her friend along. Ended up hooking up with her on the boat and she tells me she wants to frick right now. So we get ready to go and I drop my friends off at the truck to back up the trailer, drive the boat to the middle of the lake and frick her right on the floor of my boat. They were all laughing when I got back to the landing
Me and 2 friends picked up a girl from a bar who proceeds to pass out on my back seat so we decide to snort coke off of her tits. Then she woke a couple hours later and we ran a train on her
Posted on 1/13/16 at 2:45 pm to mrbootychedda
I got caught by the popo fricking in a rice field one time. Had to explain to her Dad why I was banging his baby girl.....while I still had the condom on my dick. We drank a beer together after.
Posted on 1/13/16 at 2:51 pm to mrbootychedda
I've posted this before.....
Not me, but a friend/co-worker.
We went to a 3 day banking conference for our company. On the last night, we went to the hotel bar and had a few drinks. We talked with a few people there, but it was no big deal.
We then go to get on the elevator to go to our room. The elevator was crowded and I was standing in front of my friend. I go to get off the elevator and I turned around thinking he would be right behind be. I look back, and there he is making out with a pretty damn cute woman in the back of the elevator.
I just laughed, went to the room and went to sleep.
About 8 o'clock the next morning, he walks in. I asked him what happened as I did not even see him talk to this woman during the 3 days of the conference. He said he had never met her or recalled seeing her. He said they were standing in the elevator and she just started looking at him smiling. The next thing he knew, she started kissing him and mugging with him. She initiated everything. He said he figured they would get to her floor and she would just leave. But, she took his hand, brought him back to her room and they f*cked most of the night. He said the next morning, her husband called. He left when she got on the phone with her kids. All he found out was her first name and the fact that she was a lawyer attending the conference.
This woman looked like the girl-next-door/marrying type. Just looking at her, she's someone you would never have thought would do something like this. I'm guessing she's done this often and her husband doesn't have a clue.
ETA: My friend was just an average looking dude. In fact, he could have stood to lose a few pounds. It's not like he was a GQ model.
Not me, but a friend/co-worker.
We went to a 3 day banking conference for our company. On the last night, we went to the hotel bar and had a few drinks. We talked with a few people there, but it was no big deal.
We then go to get on the elevator to go to our room. The elevator was crowded and I was standing in front of my friend. I go to get off the elevator and I turned around thinking he would be right behind be. I look back, and there he is making out with a pretty damn cute woman in the back of the elevator.
I just laughed, went to the room and went to sleep.
About 8 o'clock the next morning, he walks in. I asked him what happened as I did not even see him talk to this woman during the 3 days of the conference. He said he had never met her or recalled seeing her. He said they were standing in the elevator and she just started looking at him smiling. The next thing he knew, she started kissing him and mugging with him. She initiated everything. He said he figured they would get to her floor and she would just leave. But, she took his hand, brought him back to her room and they f*cked most of the night. He said the next morning, her husband called. He left when she got on the phone with her kids. All he found out was her first name and the fact that she was a lawyer attending the conference.
This woman looked like the girl-next-door/marrying type. Just looking at her, she's someone you would never have thought would do something like this. I'm guessing she's done this often and her husband doesn't have a clue.
ETA: My friend was just an average looking dude. In fact, he could have stood to lose a few pounds. It's not like he was a GQ model.
This post was edited on 1/13/16 at 2:56 pm
Posted on 1/13/16 at 3:01 pm to jvilletiger25
quote:
I have a friend who was taking a shite. His girlfriend came in the bathroom and started riding him while he was on the toilet, turds and all.
Some friends and I were tailgating at a Texans game. one of them is a cop. Well a buddy of his was working the game in uniform but came over to our tailgate to visit for a moment then he went back to working. A lady late 30's/early 40's came over to us and asked who he was. We told her and she replied, "I'd fricked him on the toilet."
Posted on 1/13/16 at 3:07 pm to Cdawg
You were the cop weren't you?
Posted on 1/13/16 at 3:08 pm to Cdawg
quote:
We told her and she replied, "I'd fricked him on the toilet."
Question is, would she give him a blumpkin in a port-a-john?
Posted on 1/13/16 at 3:14 pm to Cdawg
I once woke up after taking a girl back to my place. It's about 7 a.m. and I've got a terrible case of beer sh*ts. I go in the bathroom and run the shower so that she doesn't hear what's going on in the bathroom (I'm in there for a good 15-20 minutes). I guess she bought that I took a shower. I come out and somehow get a blow-j right away. Not that crazy, but I sure as hell couldn't imagine going down on a chick if she had just taken the crap I just let out. Closest I'll ever get to a blumpkin.
Also had a roommate where we shared a bathroom. The bathroom had a door that went into his room and there was a door open to the hallway. The door to his room would be locked a lot from when I used it. He brings home a girl who passes out before anything happens. He decides to go down the street to a friends house to hang out. I'm passed out on the couch and start hearing banging from his room at like 4 a.m.. The girl woke up and had no idea where she was. She apparently thought the bathroom door was the way out of the room, but the door was locked. She thought someone had locked her in a random bedroom. I had to "let her out" and deal with that shite. Thank God we kind of knew who this girl was through friends. If it would have been a complete rando, I would have definitely gotten the pepper spray that night.
I've also woken up in a pool of a young ladies urine. That one cost me a new mattress. Similar story happened to a friend a few months later. Years later, I get to know a guy through my wife and her friends. We find out he's getting married to none other than the bed wetter (not mine but the previous friend). That was a weird intro...."hey this is xxxx"...."you look really familiar, did you ever piss in a guy's bed?"
Also had a roommate where we shared a bathroom. The bathroom had a door that went into his room and there was a door open to the hallway. The door to his room would be locked a lot from when I used it. He brings home a girl who passes out before anything happens. He decides to go down the street to a friends house to hang out. I'm passed out on the couch and start hearing banging from his room at like 4 a.m.. The girl woke up and had no idea where she was. She apparently thought the bathroom door was the way out of the room, but the door was locked. She thought someone had locked her in a random bedroom. I had to "let her out" and deal with that shite. Thank God we kind of knew who this girl was through friends. If it would have been a complete rando, I would have definitely gotten the pepper spray that night.
I've also woken up in a pool of a young ladies urine. That one cost me a new mattress. Similar story happened to a friend a few months later. Years later, I get to know a guy through my wife and her friends. We find out he's getting married to none other than the bed wetter (not mine but the previous friend). That was a weird intro...."hey this is xxxx"...."you look really familiar, did you ever piss in a guy's bed?"
This post was edited on 1/13/16 at 3:19 pm
Posted on 1/13/16 at 3:22 pm to mrbootychedda
This post was edited on 11/8/20 at 11:38 am
Posted on 1/13/16 at 3:31 pm to CadesCove
quote:
would she give him a blumpkin in a port-a-john?
Probably not. She didn't seem like THAT type of girl. Port-a-john? pfft.
Posted on 1/13/16 at 3:35 pm to ChunkyLover54
quote:
Was this in a bed? How was cleanup?
Best advice I would give any young guy, black egyptian cotton 1000+ thread count sheets.
Coupled with a striped dark comforter, you're good to go.
Posted on 1/13/16 at 3:40 pm to mrbootychedda
Had a buddy in college who was f-ing this girl in his bed. He said that they were going at it pretty hard when she fell off the bed and broke her arm. She started crying and insisted that he finish before taking her to the emergency room.
All I know for sure is that she was hanging out with him at a party that night and the next time I saw her, she had her arm in a cast.
All I know for sure is that she was hanging out with him at a party that night and the next time I saw her, she had her arm in a cast.
Posted on 1/13/16 at 3:42 pm to X123F45
I had sex with my gf and she started...afterwards I got up to pee and turned on the light. I had clumps of blood on my dick. Turned on the lights in the bedroom and it looked like someone slaughtered a pig in the bed. Best part is it was her best friends moms bed...needless to say her best friend wasn't happy.
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