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Started By
Message
re: Visiting the graveside of a lost loved one
Posted on 5/8/18 at 11:51 am to JackieTreehorn
Posted on 5/8/18 at 11:51 am to JackieTreehorn
Glad I’m not the only one. It’s only been a year and a half but it makes me uncomfortable to even think about going.
Posted on 5/8/18 at 11:51 am to Count Chocula
Too many rules, that just burns me up!
Posted on 5/8/18 at 11:52 am to 777Tiger
quote:ISWYDT
that just burns me up!
Posted on 5/8/18 at 11:53 am to Scruffy
quote:
Graveyards are strange constructs. We use massive amounts of land to entomb bodies below headstones that will be ultimately forgotten and disregarded.
Scruffy thinks they are wastes of prime real estate.
definitely seems like one of those traditions that we should have let fall by the wayside
funeral industry has always struck me as pretty slimy though
Posted on 5/8/18 at 11:54 am to Tiger Ryno
I used to work in graveyards, what's sad is when you find a gravemarker covered by grass or dirt, and realise no one has came or gave a shite in decades
Posted on 5/8/18 at 11:56 am to StealthCalais11
I visit my grandmother's grave about once a year. I don't live far from where she is buried, but honestly, I just don't have much of an emotional connection with her gravesite. Her body is there but "she" is not.
I think about her in my mind on a daily basis and don't need a visit to the cemetery for any extra motivation.
As a religious person, I also feel like our loved ones are watching over us from Heaven. I don't need to travel to a grave to feel like she is close by.
I think about her in my mind on a daily basis and don't need a visit to the cemetery for any extra motivation.
As a religious person, I also feel like our loved ones are watching over us from Heaven. I don't need to travel to a grave to feel like she is close by.
This post was edited on 5/8/18 at 11:57 am
Posted on 5/8/18 at 11:58 am to TH03
quote:
Just cremate me and throw me in the backyard. I DGAF.
how soon can we do this?
Posted on 5/8/18 at 12:01 pm to LSUBoo
Shelby was a he. He was a past employee of LSU SID and at the time of death, asst. mgr. at the box office of the River Center.
His mom was employed by LSU AD in housekeeping.
He was well known around LSU. The football game after his murder had a tribute to him on the Jumbotron.
His mom was employed by LSU AD in housekeeping.
He was well known around LSU. The football game after his murder had a tribute to him on the Jumbotron.
Posted on 5/8/18 at 12:02 pm to Deep Purple Haze
I just visited my grandfather's grave this weekend to help my grandmother place flowers on it and pick up a few of the older/dead flower arrangements.
I actually like visiting graveyards on occasion, it's kind of a neat look back in history. I've been working on my family tree book for the last 3 years and seeing where previous generations are buried (those before my birth) inspires me to keep working harder on that family tree book and history.
If anything it's prompted me to visit older generations graves and provide them some upkeep. It makes me feel a connection to those ancestors who came before me, odd as that sounds.
I actually like visiting graveyards on occasion, it's kind of a neat look back in history. I've been working on my family tree book for the last 3 years and seeing where previous generations are buried (those before my birth) inspires me to keep working harder on that family tree book and history.
If anything it's prompted me to visit older generations graves and provide them some upkeep. It makes me feel a connection to those ancestors who came before me, odd as that sounds.
This post was edited on 5/8/18 at 12:03 pm
Posted on 5/8/18 at 12:05 pm to BuckeyeFan87
quote:
I find viewing headstones interesting, especially older ones.
My Dad bought a new piece of property about two years ago that we found two old headstones on. You can barely read them. One says the persons name, then date of birth and death (died before the civil war even started) then says he was a school teacher and died of dysentery. Very cool. I will try to find the picture I took of it.
Posted on 5/8/18 at 12:08 pm to BayouBengal51
I don't have an opinion on them. I don't find comfort from them or dislike them. I don't really want to be buried in one. I want to be cremated and spread at places I loved. If my wife wants to be buried, I would probably want at least some of me with her. It's just symbolic and it's not like I will give a shite.
After 2-3 generations or so, your family doesn't know or care who you were. I remember some things about my great grandparents, beyond that I have no idea about my family. At some point, we are going to have to figure out a better way than these giant cemetaries. No use in having graves from 100+ years ago that have no historic value.
After 2-3 generations or so, your family doesn't know or care who you were. I remember some things about my great grandparents, beyond that I have no idea about my family. At some point, we are going to have to figure out a better way than these giant cemetaries. No use in having graves from 100+ years ago that have no historic value.
Posted on 5/8/18 at 12:09 pm to Murtown
You can find those old "family" cemeteries scattered around Lafayette and Vermilion parishes, date back in time when people were often buried on family homesteads.
Posted on 5/8/18 at 12:10 pm to Tiger Ryno
I’ll get a six pack and go sit on my brother’s grave and just talk to him for hours. Maybe it doesn’t make any sense but it’s somewhere for me to go and just be.
Posted on 5/8/18 at 12:10 pm to Tiger Ryno
I lost my mother right before I turned 10. Not having her around was tough. I often visit her when I’m feeling blue. It always makes me feel better and helps me see things more clearly. Not everything needs to be understood by everyone, then again many haven’t gone through the pain of losing their mother at such a young age.
Hug your mom’s tight this Mother’s Day. What I wouldn’t give to celebrate one again with mine.
Hug your mom’s tight this Mother’s Day. What I wouldn’t give to celebrate one again with mine.
Posted on 5/8/18 at 12:12 pm to Tiger Ryno
Of course. I visit the grave of my best friend a few times a year and just sit. About half the time I also visit my grandmother in the same cemetery. Bear Bryant is also in the cemetery so I like to drive by his grave too and laugh at the fat losers leaving bags of Golden Flake behind.
Just don't be one of those people who have to take a selfie with the grave and post it on facebook, Insta, Snapchat for attention.
Just don't be one of those people who have to take a selfie with the grave and post it on facebook, Insta, Snapchat for attention.
Posted on 5/8/18 at 12:13 pm to BayouBengal51
quote:
It makes me feel a connection to those ancestors who came before me, odd as that sounds
Not odd but very respectful. There's nothing creepy or weird about wanting to look back and see who the people were that you are related to. They were real people who led real lives that were just as interesting as yours or mine. Their story is over until someone brings it back or remembers them. We can learn a lot from those who came before us. Today's environment is too political, too cynical and too selfish. Sometimes its interesting to see what some of your relatives did in life that remind you of yourself. Always pretty neat to find those things out...
Posted on 5/8/18 at 12:18 pm to Tiger Ryno
My wife's father treated me like I was his own. He passed away back in August and I visit him on my lunch hour 2 or 3 times a month, but my office is right down the street from the funeral home. He would spend hours looking out his window at the multiple bird feeders in his backyard before the cancer finally go the best of him. He always made a point of telling us what kind of birds he saw whenever we visited.
We put a bird feeder near his grave, it only seemed fitting. Anyone who's ever had a bird feeder knows that birds are an absolute mess so i filled it with dried meal worms to cut down on the mess they leave behind. The only problem is that those little frickers love the worms and go through them rather quickly. It gives me an excuse to go visit him and talk or even just to read. It's really the only place to get some peace and quiet and not to be bothered by someone every other minute.
We put a bird feeder near his grave, it only seemed fitting. Anyone who's ever had a bird feeder knows that birds are an absolute mess so i filled it with dried meal worms to cut down on the mess they leave behind. The only problem is that those little frickers love the worms and go through them rather quickly. It gives me an excuse to go visit him and talk or even just to read. It's really the only place to get some peace and quiet and not to be bothered by someone every other minute.
Posted on 5/8/18 at 12:18 pm to BowlJackson
quote:
Bear Bryant is also in the cemetery so I like to drive by his grave too and laugh at the fat losers leaving bags of Golden Flake behind.
Whats his connection with Golden Flake?
Posted on 5/8/18 at 12:19 pm to Pecker
quote:
Not my scene either but I haven't had a parent pass yet. My opinion might change. Seems like it would just make me sad.
conversely, if you see loved ones at gravesides in places like Arlington, you can witness how important it is to the survivor(s) to be able to have a physical connection to their loved one. I personally don't visit graves and don't think I would.
However, I'm certainly not going to judge someone for how they choose to grieve. Especially if its no harm to me. This is about as harmless as it gets.
unless you're Scruffy and trying to plan a new development.
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