re: Taking this to the OT for advice.

if the OP raised her to make good decisions, this wouldn't be a thread on the OT

No he has his own apt in Gainesville his parents bought him one. He is a freshman also. She goes to FSU

You are right and you are wrong.
Your daughter is a legal adult and could go sign up for the military and deploy without your consent.

She is also your daughter and if she is still financially dependent on you then she should follow your rules.
If you gave her a strong upbringing then you have to trust she can be responsible away from you.
In your house you make the rules.
I have 4 kids

(no message)

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Is she still dependent on you? That's the only way you really have a leg to stand on. She's an adult, not much you can do if you can't threaten to cut her off. It's happening without you knowing when she's at school, why does it bother you so much at home? It always seems like a dude forgets women like to frick too after they have a daughter

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If she is still dependent financially don’t threaten to cut her off unless you’re prepared to do so and can live with the consequences if she decides to be cut off. I’d weigh the risks. She is 18. She’s probably having sex. Even if she is financially dependent, and probably is, being forced to make that decision at that age is liable to go badly wrong. Chances are if she decides to force you to cut her off and you do she is going to have to come crawling back in the future. Do you want to do that to her? If so by all means do so - only you can know what that means and if you’re willing to put her and yourself through it. Chances are pretty high she is sexually active…she’s 18, most people are. You seem to be ok with that away from home, is your feelings worth damaging your relationship?

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She then late night decides she is going to stay with him at his parents house.
I said hell no.

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If you're not going to let the BF go balls deep into her tight little pink hole at your place you really leave her no other choice but to go the the bf's parent's house.

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Then why ask for outsiders' opinions?

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This. While I might also be "old school" and agree with the OP about traditional moral values, he doesn't want a discussion, he wants validation.

That's chick behavior, IMHO.

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My philosophy was when they are paying 100% of their bills then they can make 100% of the decisions. This x 10000!!!!! If this is not the case, then she is not an adult.

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Presumably one would want their daughter in their lives and their grandchildren if she ever has any. Telling her at 18 that you control her decisions completely or the money is cut off sounds good in theory. It may be a good way to lose her and her kids from your life forever. If you’re okay with that by all means do it….but don’t be surprised if it backfires on you. If I had been told that at that age I would not have accepted it…and when I was cut off I’d have cut out whoever was responsible.

I get your point and fully understand the geographical point. I’m a daddy with a daughter. They are always 3 years old. But they ain’t. I’d explain my position in mature terms, including the geographical aspect that allows me to ignore it and cope with it, and ask her to respect that. She probably wouldn’t but she’d know where I stand. I’d also remind her of her decision with every penny going forward. I wouldn’t cut her off but she’d know full well that her decision had damaged our relationship and it’s her doing.

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I disagree on this, really good kids have the capacity to make really poor decisions. Impulse control doesn't fully develop until mid 20s.

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He's fine with her staying at her boyfriend's house when she is away at school, but has a problem with her staying at her boyfriend's parents house. It's a stupid hill to die on

18 years old? No, you're not wrong.