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Started By
Message
re: Raw oysters at 5, severe stomach cramps at 8:15…how bad is my night about to be?
Posted on 5/13/22 at 6:20 pm to WildTchoupitoulas
Posted on 5/13/22 at 6:20 pm to WildTchoupitoulas
Day 5 of gut pain and loose shits. The death march continues. I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel.
0
Posted on 5/13/22 at 6:50 pm to EasterEgg
quote:
That is such a crock of shite. I guarantee the oysters are safer in May than September. The water temps aren't terribly high yet in May. And our Septembers are hot as hell.
I dunno, ask the OP his opinion today?
Posted on 5/13/22 at 7:06 pm to fr33manator
quote:
Never gotten sick from oysters before. What am I in for?
It was coming out both ends at the same time for me. Sickest I’ve ever been. I wanted to just commit suicide.
This post was edited on 5/13/22 at 7:07 pm
Posted on 5/13/22 at 7:08 pm to WildTchoupitoulas
quote:
In short: Only eat oysters when nothing else is in season (crawfish, shrimp, crabs) and you'll be alright.
IMO this is all bs. These things were when there maybe wasn’t proper transporting and cooling. So you just did it in cooler months.
No need now as long as they are handled properly.
This post was edited on 5/13/22 at 7:11 pm
Posted on 5/13/22 at 7:10 pm to fr33manator
Next time fry them suckers and put them on a bun with some mayo lettuce and tomato.
Posted on 5/13/22 at 7:12 pm to OysterPoBoy
The experts are weighing in
Posted on 5/13/22 at 8:57 pm to fr33manator
I got sick off oysters only once in my life and it wasn't nice.
It was a tossup when heading to the bathroom if I was going to puke in the toilet or have explosive shits, sometimes both at the same time.
Thank goodness for empty 5 gallon paint buckets.
Took 2 days to start feeling normal. Drink lots of water if you are having the shits and puking or you'll dehydrate too much.
It was a tossup when heading to the bathroom if I was going to puke in the toilet or have explosive shits, sometimes both at the same time.
Thank goodness for empty 5 gallon paint buckets.
Took 2 days to start feeling normal. Drink lots of water if you are having the shits and puking or you'll dehydrate too much.
Posted on 5/13/22 at 9:23 pm to Tigerpaw123
quote:
I dunno, ask the OP his opinion today?
Well, finally took a dump, feeling better now, cramps minor. None of the other symptoms arose so I dodged a bullet I guess. Either that or I have an iron stomach, but it felt like a thunderdome last night and today.
And since Jack Daniel asked so sweet for it, here’s a little something.
An Ode To Oysters
The outside’s like a dirty rock,
The inside’s like a loogie,
And it’s been said they’ll help you do,
The horizontal boogie,
They slide right down your gullet,
And all the world is right,
But if you get a bad one,
You’ll be in for one long night,
Their ghosts come out of nowhere,
knot your guts all up with pain,
You’ll rush into the bathroom,
Where you’ll struggle and you’ll strain,
As Both ends flow forth with evil,
First you’ll plead with God, then curse,
Nearly lifting off the toilet,
As the oysters do their worst,
You’ll try to leave the porcelain throne,
And pray it’s at an end,
A rumble in your guttiwuts,
You rush right back again,
The toilet looks like modern art,
So violent is the spray,
I only hope for your sake,
You’ve got yourself a bidet,
Cold sweat will drench your brow,
You King of feces holding court,
And if you don’t move quick,
You might be filling up your shorts,
As the cursed things course through you,
You will count each bathroom tile,
You’ll swear those shells from hell off,
And you’ll keep your word awhile,
Here, the moral of the story,
If you’re at an oyster bar,
Get them fried or baked or chargrilled,
In the months without an R,
So take it from a man,
Who played a fool and pressed his luck,
When the oysters come for revenge,
Then your arse is proper shucked
This post was edited on 5/13/22 at 10:09 pm
Posted on 5/13/22 at 9:34 pm to fr33manator
Take some tums, something to help you go to sleep and it might help.
Also, just because you ate oysters doesn't mean that its 100% the reason your stomach hurts. Either way stop being a bitch.
Also, just because you ate oysters doesn't mean that its 100% the reason your stomach hurts. Either way stop being a bitch.
Posted on 5/13/22 at 9:35 pm to OweO
Posted on 5/13/22 at 9:46 pm to fr33manator
Free, don't eat oysters in months without ar R. That's what maw maw said.
Posted on 5/13/22 at 9:49 pm to fr33manator
quote:
Well, finally took a dump, feeling better now, cramps minor. None of the other symptoms arose so I dodged a bullet I guess.
Glad you’re feeling better but you didn’t have food poisoning from seafood. Food poisoning leaves a mark that one doesn’t simply forget, it’s the reason I haven’t ate hogshead cheese since 1988.
Posted on 5/13/22 at 9:50 pm to OysterPoBoy
quote:
Oyster Poboy
Name definitely checks out
Posted on 5/13/22 at 9:56 pm to fr33manator
Seriously great work there. Tweak a couple lines for better scan, and you're right up in e.e. cummings territory.
Posted on 5/13/22 at 9:58 pm to fr33manator
I typed a response that I know you cocksuckers would RA so I will just say.. I hope you feel better soon.
Posted on 5/13/22 at 10:09 pm to OweO
Type it Christopher. Don’t be scared, no one is gonna RA your stupid post
Posted on 5/13/22 at 10:09 pm to gizmothepug
quote:
it’s the reason I haven’t ate hogshead cheese since 1988.
It's the reason I was three days late for my first drivers license, and haven't eaten egg salad since 1979...
fricking boiled eggs in an Easter basket? My Mother lost her damn mind.
Posted on 5/13/22 at 10:14 pm to OysterPoBoy
quote:
Next time fry them suckers and put them on a bun with some mayo lettuce and tomato.
What would you call that?
Posted on 5/13/22 at 10:21 pm to fr33manator
quote:
Never gotten sick from oysters before
Hope you have a bidet baw
Raw oysters are my favorite thing to eat on the planet. Been there only once in my life. Prepare thy anus.
Posted on 5/13/22 at 10:24 pm to fr33manator
Ate a dozen tonight. Feel great. Sorry bout it
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