re: How to express disapproval with how your wife is decorating your house?

Have you encouraged her decorating in any way? No really, stop and think back.

When I want to make changes to common areas, I will ask my husband's thoughts. Most common answer? I don't care, whatever you want. Then I research, pull samples, pick our furniture options, do my best to pull pictures of the finished product I am thinking, spending a lot of time and effort to so do. I also ask him his thoughts along the way. Again, "Looks great, I don't care, whatever you want". He does not offer objections or suggestions. Sometimes this stage goes on for weeks or even months depending on the size of the project.

The MINUTE something starts changing, "I don't like this. What if we did that instead?". And what he wants will literally change the entire project direction and the materials that have already been bought. Which would be fine if he had spoken up in the weeks/months of the planning stages!

If you refused to be a part of the planning, stay out of the execution. If she hasn't included you, tell her that you love what she has been doing but you feel like "YOU" are getting lost in what should be "OUR" room. And then work with her to make your room be blend of you.

That’s so foreign to me. My SO would literally say “looks like shite” to my face if he hated something I put in the house and I’d either laugh and tell him to deal with it, or I’d relent and get rid of it.

I can’t wrap my head around this upsetting someone enough to be a fight.

She is thinking of King George anytime you get frisky. Why do you give a shite how the house is decorated. Make sure she keeps it clean and food cooked and keep your mouth shut.

quote:

---

Now my entire house looks like a British smoking parlor or an old author's writing room. I pulled together his masculine things by balancing with lighter items but it is a very European look.

---

That’s my dream! Brown leather chairs, dark wood.. I love masculine decor with deep metallic accents (emerald, for example). Then something like a cream fur throw blanket that stands out.

quote:

---

It would take extremely bad decorating for me to fight this battle but burlap curtains might reach the threshold.

---

Tell her that you worry about health concerns about having that much burlap in a room where you spend so much time. Inhaling the fibers can lead to Byssinosis.

I mean, not likely but I recently read about a crafter who used to make wreaths with burlap and is now permanently disabled with no cure because of the inhaled fibers. Might be enough to scare her into something more palatable.

quote:

---

But unilateral decisions are selfish and when those acts of selfishness become unreasonable, there is a problem

---

I suppose if I cared about interior decorating it might bother me a little.

Not all decisions should be negotiated.

Sounds like a very timeless look that won’t look outdated 5-10 years from now

Serious question


You said you take random objects found outside.


What are you doing to prevent bugs,mites, etc that have made those pieces of wood and some of the other objects their home from now making your house their new home?

My wife redid our new house with a coastal them with modern elements. I worry this will be out of style soon if not already. I told her she is stuck with it.