re: Having other single friends in your 30s

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It's not just getting hammered. It's that you can go to the gym, fish, hunt, play golf, etc. whenever you want.

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Another option is to date someone who also likes these hobbies. To me, this is the difference between someone you want to frick and someone you want to spend your life with. You should not be banning each other from activities you enjoy, but sharing them together. Or at least giving each other time to do them without resentment.

At this point in life, I think the main thing is where you live. Living in a rural area or bedroom community while being single in your 30s and 40s would suck unless you do a lot of outdoor activities.

However, living in a metropolitan (no necessarily huge) city is the way to go. While New Orelans isn't a huge city it has a lot of fun, not late night, activities that are perfect. In fact the majority of the social places I go, including bars, are generally full of people over 30, and I'm sure many are single.

Yeah I don't have any kids but I feel like people are now slaves to their children these days..

We will be at a party and I see others have to leave because "we need to put the kids to bed".

When I was growing up my parents never left a wedding/party early because of me. They just made a pallet in the corner and were like if your tired go lay your arse down and don't bother us.

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We will be at a party and I see others have to leave because "we need to put the kids to bed".

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this is your friends wanting to leave and go to bed

I love using this excuse

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Plus their old ladies don't want them hanging out with you, cause they're worried they might get the taste of freedom I guess.

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Single in my 30s...this is a real thing. I've had friends whose wives had previously encouraged to hang out with me. Yeah, that doesn't last for long, they change their tune quickly.

Had one friend that was held up 30 minutes or more we'd hang out because he said he had to calm his wife down who started crying because he wanted to go out. I suppose that's a step above the ones that will outright forbid their husbands from going out.

Not saying that there aren't cool wives out there that let their husbands go out without getting emotional about it but it's not common from my experience.

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I was married right out of college and missed out on my 20s. Now that I'm ready to get out and have some fun, I have to do it alone most of the time.

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Therein lies the problem. You didn't sow your wild oats and now you're back at it.

I don't think being single in your 30's is a big deal depending upon where you live. If you are in a bigger city (NY, LA, SF, Chicago, Boston, Seattle, etc.) you should have no issues meeting people to hang out with and date. A town in the South or the Midwest...yeah, your options are more likely to be limited.

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The key is finding friends with actual backbones that have the ability to tell their wife 'hey I'm gonna grab dinner and beers with my friends' from time to time. Often times, guys seem to marry and you'll never see them again. Sad.

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This right here. I'm the married dude with the long leash that all my married friends use as the party foil. Uhh, no honey it was tigerpimpbot's idea to go to the skrip cluh. It's sad, but it's funny that all the wives hate me.

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I have to do it alone most of the time

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So what? I do shite by myself all of the time. I go on vacations, festivals, bars, day trips, exploring, etc regularly. Doesn't matter to me if people don't want to go. I'm not gonna be the guy sitting at home wanting to or wishing I had done something, but didn't because I wasn't secure enough with myself to do so

My wife and I are in our 40s w no kids, and it's similar. Almost all of my friends have moved away (and have kids), and her friends have kids or live elsewhere. I love our nieces and nephews and our close friends' kids, but generally we don't like being around kids/parents for reasons similar to your complaint. Luckily we spend summers and part of ski season in MT with our friends who think they're still 18, so that's a fun reprieve (but also depressing in its own way).

I feel a spin-off thread brewing about how insufferable most of the young yuppie families are (for us, specifically, in Decatur/Oakhurst,Ga), who take over entire restaurants and don't control their f'ing children. Every establishment becomes a damned Romper Room.

What is a bedroom community?