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Message
re: Did your wife change after your first kid?
Posted on 2/13/21 at 8:47 am to tigerbandpiccolo
Posted on 2/13/21 at 8:47 am to tigerbandpiccolo
quote:
I’ll never understand this. I have known girls who didn’t have sex from the time they got pregnant through the first year of their kid’s life. All jokes aside, that is truly insane and unfair.
It’s wild! There are over 400 moms in this group for my birth month. Someone made a poll about sex a couple weeks ago, and the overwhelming majority just...aren’t. With many who, like you said, are basically taking 2 years off from sex and fully believe their husbands ought to just grow up and deal with it without complaint. That’s how you end up divorced.
3
Posted on 2/13/21 at 8:47 am to tigerbandpiccolo
Eventually we get tired of going to the trouble of asking only to be told NO and find other outlets for happiness. Planned to leave after kids left but now I’m staying to ignore her and get some much deserved satisfaction from her misery.
Posted on 2/13/21 at 9:00 am to The Third Leg
(no message)
This post was edited on 2/14/21 at 6:14 pm
Posted on 2/13/21 at 9:20 am to sparkinator
quote:This is great and how it should be!
we hold a special love for ourselves. We will be longer than the kids will be dependent on us.
We both are committed to each other regardless. We love our kids but realize that our commitment isn’t based on our kids.
Posted on 2/13/21 at 9:24 am to KemoSabe65
quote:That isn’t good, normal, healthy, or fair to you. You might want to consider therapy or other options. I’m a woman in my 30’s who loves sex and has a child.
We are typically an every couple years act couple.
We are roommates for the most part now.
Life is too short to be in a sexless relationship.
Posted on 2/13/21 at 9:27 am to OldHickory
This would have moved me up a spot. Lol
Posted on 2/13/21 at 9:29 am to boosiebadazz
Some change after the first (nothing dramatic - typical life adjustments). Big change after second (and last) because she became a "stay at home" mom and she had been a career woman to that point (and was damned good at what she did). She never regretted it and our kids absolutely benefitted from it.
Posted on 2/13/21 at 9:30 am to tigergirl10
quote:
tigergirl10
quote:
I’m a woman in my 30’s who loves sex and has a child.
Posted on 2/13/21 at 9:32 am to tigergirl10
quote:
I’m a woman in my 30’s who loves sex and has a child.
No you aren't
Give up the act....no one, and I mean NO ONE on this board believes you actually possess a vagina
Posted on 2/13/21 at 9:35 am to tigergirl10
quote:
That isn’t good, normal, healthy, or fair to you. You might want to consider therapy or other options. I’m a woman in my 30’s who loves sex and has a child.
Life is too short to be in a sexless relationship.
Chicken and his admin team must really like you Walt.
Posted on 2/13/21 at 9:36 am to boosiebadazz
Our first is on the way 
Posted on 2/13/21 at 10:26 am to boosiebadazz
A to C.
Posted on 2/13/21 at 10:31 am to udtiger
quote:
Some change after the first (nothing dramatic - typical life adjustments).
I'd say it changes ALL women, and even changes men. And it should. It's a life altering moment. If hearing a baby you helped create cry in the delivery room doesn't change you, I'd argue you have no soul. Part of marriage is navigating and adapting to those changes. Many are successful doing that, many are not.
Posted on 2/13/21 at 10:33 am to boosiebadazz
My wife changed from minute to minute.
Posted on 2/13/21 at 10:37 am to Penrod
quote:
That 6 year period between kids and grandkids was a period of drift for her. She had trouble finding meaning in her life. It’s my opinion that if a person does not have a way to contribute to the well-being of others it is impossible to be content
This is sort of where we are .. I work very part time (currently from home due to covid) but with no kids to see about/be responsible for/do things for, it's just kind of like you're out there floundering to figure out what to do next.
Just a weird season for sure that I don't really care for. Second son is getting married in a year so it'll be a while before grandkids come my way. I'm trying to hang in there.
Posted on 2/13/21 at 11:33 am to boosiebadazz
Of course. She had some depression even. But makes having the next kid much easier.
Posted on 2/13/21 at 11:36 am to X82ndTiger
Thanks for your service baw.
Posted on 2/13/21 at 11:38 am to SlidellCajun
quote:And a great cause of divorce. I can’t imagine much of a relationship is left after the kids are grown and years of her time we’re only spent on kids that are now living on their own.
It can be a cause for much angst for many married men
Posted on 2/13/21 at 11:41 am to boosiebadazz
quote:
It’s like motherhood has elevated her to another level of responsibility and responsiveness and awesomeness and I can’t help but think it’s because she’s preternaturally disposed to providing for our daughter and I’m just along for the ride.
We have a 7 month old. I agree with all of this.
Posted on 2/13/21 at 11:44 am to OldHickory
quote:
Once kids come along, you’re number two.
Yea but the woman is number 2 for us too. Kids come first for everybody except shite tier parents
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