re: Corporate speak/expressions heard in the business world

“To piggy back off what the commander said...”

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Reach Out – communicating with someone in an attempt to obtain valuable but often times pointless information. i.e. “to contact.”
Example: See Bandwidth above.

Grow
Example: I think that in order for you to grow in this company you need to be known as a leader and not just a doer. That is why I’m going to need you to lead this effort which will require you to work til ungodly hours of the night every night for 3 months. You won’t get a significant pay raise, but you might get a pat on the back from the Broyles, the VP, if you do a good job!

Touch base with [coworker]

Protocol

Push Back - when one receives negative reception from a coworker or client regarding the completion of a task or request
Example: I called Miranda four times to request a copy of the latest payroll report... the bitch wouldn’t answer the phone the first three tries, then the fourth she answered and gave me push back as she questioned my authority for reviewing such reports.

Let me bounce that off him/her - A CYA action taken to make sure your superior knows about a terrible decision that you are about to make.

Bigger fish to fry

Time-sensitive - when a project’s deadline is fast approaching and something needs to be done quickly to finish the project

Email blast - an email generally sent out to a large group.
Example: Brock, please send out an email blast to the XYZ team to announce the launch of our new product, GayBallz.

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I don't really see those as being "corporate speak." Some of those are just phrases used in everyday language or the most succinct way to phrase something.

I always consider "corporate speak" as some cringy analogy or way to explain something that makes it sound fancier than it actually is.

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Group Synergy Enhancement: the added productivity gained by pooling team ideas and resources to solve a problem."

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so fricking talking to your team regarding a project... this shite is insufferable.

What made it even worse was he was the MC so to speak so he spoke a bunch in between other speakers... On the second day he came out and said..."DID ANYONE GETMO YESTERDAY?!?!" I was sitting there thinking...are you asking if someone was working on a project and decided they had put adequate time/resources into it? I mean maybe...not sure why you have to scream the fricking question

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"At the end of the day..."

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guilty. Maybe not 50 but I say it too much.

I also say 'to cut to the chase' then dont cut to the chase.

“Get in that arse Larry”. Seems inappropriate.

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I’ll “ping” you later in the week

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This one really irritates me.

One I like: "open the kimono." It irritates women, but typically comes from someone so high up that it doesn't matter.

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After reading this thread I am excited to use “Jew them down” somehow at work tomorrow.

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Oh, that's definitely a CLM that's gonna get you an HR Red Card and might end up being an RGE... Synergy.

my favorite was "lets frick this one right in the pussy, boys!"

just kidding. Ill say that on my last day

“It’s an ‘arbitrage opportunity’”.. which from what I can gather, basically means to buy something and then sell it at a profit, or just capitalize on an imbalance.


The one that irks me the most though is when i had this coworker who constantly used the word ‘piece’.. she was always talking about ‘the marketing piece’ or the ‘educational piece’.. i guess the fact that she was a total Cee U Next Tuesday made me hate her phrases even more.

One I actually like: when discussing transparency between two companies, “open kimono”.