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re: Article: Always Go To The Funeral
Posted on 10/30/26 at 6:50 am to jclem11
Posted on 10/30/26 at 6:50 am to jclem11
When my father died, I appreciated many of his old coworkers (he had been retired for 20 years) who showed up and shared stories, even though I did not know some of them before that day.
It influenced me to be a better attender (I prefer the visitation to the actual funeral).
In the past, I often used the excuse that I knew the deceased, but his/her family had no idea who I was. I then learned that it doesn't matter.
I now try to introduce myself to the family, tell them how I knew the deceased, and share a quick story or observation about them. They really seem to appreciate it. I know that I did.
It influenced me to be a better attender (I prefer the visitation to the actual funeral).
In the past, I often used the excuse that I knew the deceased, but his/her family had no idea who I was. I then learned that it doesn't matter.
I now try to introduce myself to the family, tell them how I knew the deceased, and share a quick story or observation about them. They really seem to appreciate it. I know that I did.
Posted on 10/30/26 at 6:50 am to jclem11
quote:
jclem11
Didnt read. No thanks
Posted on 10/30/26 at 7:03 am to jclem11
I’ve always thought one of the most childish traits in a person is avoiding funerals.
No one wants to be there. You go anyway, because you should.
Some people just can’t understand that. And they wonder why people don’t trust them.
No one wants to be there. You go anyway, because you should.
Some people just can’t understand that. And they wonder why people don’t trust them.
Posted on 10/30/26 at 7:06 am to jclem11
quote:
Always go to the funeral. Do it for the family
Is this a Southern thing?
2 places I hate
#1 Hospitals
#2 Funerals
Since as far back as I can remember as a child I had to go and represent the family, including traveling to ones away.
Pre WWII generation = you went
Boomers = maybe you went, women got a pass
Post Boomers = Under 50%, everybody got a pass
35 and under = Could care less, even if they are a beneficiary
Posted on 10/30/26 at 7:11 am to Mo Jeaux
quote:
I’m of a different mindset. They’re creepy, particularly any sort of open casket visitation being the worst.
Perhaps you are young?
Do you remember when they were in homes and the area was iced?
Modern age has lost the closure between life and death. Open casket is so your eyes see (and possibly you touch) so that your brain processes the person is no longer living. Same with livestock. When the calf or foal is lost you leave it with the mother for about 1/2 hour so the mother can process and will be calm. Until she registers death (however her brain process it) she will be upset if removed too soon.
Posted on 10/30/26 at 7:15 am to PillPusher
quote:
They’re the ones that will remember you came.
I can’t remember everyone that showed up to my wedding. I remember everyone that attended my dad’s funeral.
Posted on 10/30/26 at 7:17 am to jclem11
I was very close to my Dad. After he died, I was pretty emotional and don’t have a clear memory of the ceremony. However, I have gone back and looked at the book and read the names of everyone who came. It absolutely meant the world to me.
Posted on 10/30/26 at 7:30 am to MikeAV8s
When my brother passed away, I was very surprised by some of the people that showed up for him and us. I was also surprised by some of the people that did not, some of whom I considered good friends. I will never forget that they failed to show up. Some of them I’ll never speak to again. Some I still speak to, but it’s not the same and it won’t be much longer u til we don’t talk at all anymore
Posted on 10/30/26 at 7:34 am to Cheese Grits
quote:
Perhaps you are young?
Nope.
quote:
Modern age has lost the closure between life and death. Open casket is so your eyes see (and possibly you touch) so that your brain processes the person is no longer living. Same with livestock. When the calf or foal is lost you leave it with the mother for about 1/2 hour so the mother can process and will be calm. Until she registers death (however her brain process it) she will be upset if removed too soon.
Sounds like some hokey nonsense. I’m with Jesus on funerals. “Let the dead bury the dead.”
Posted on 10/30/26 at 7:47 am to jclem11
Damn this got to me. Me and my grandfather are going to my ex wife's dad's funeral today. He showed up to my grandmother's in 2019 and it's something that I have never forgotten.
Posted on 10/30/26 at 7:48 am to jclem11
I go to funerals as well. However I did learn one thing from the wife of a good friend who passed away in his 40's. While she was grateful for everyone who came to the funeral to pay their respects, it was a month later, 2 months later that she needed someone to talk to and no one was around. We were just checking up on her and didn't think about that. So please not only go to the funeral, but pick up the cell phone and give them a quick call or text message a few weeks after just to say hello.
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