American Sails Yacht to Russia for Online Romance, Gets 5 Years for Having Guns On Board

Ol' girls cupcake was probably riddled with STDs and stank and baw still sailed across the Pacific for it.

Undefeated.

Truely FAFO story.

So much to unpack here. Think I'll just move on.

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sailed across the Pacific

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Ehhhh

"Yacht"

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sailed across the Pacific

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Clearly geography isn't your strong suit.

Biden would trade 15 arms dealer thugs to get him back.

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Biden would trade 15 arms dealer thugs to get him back.

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Nah, this guy is straight.

Between 1996 and 2007 I went to the Bahamas probably 100 times in my boat and I ALWAYS had at least one gun onboard. Clearing customs in west end was a simple process back then but they would, on occasion, board the boat while inbound or at the marina. Was always a butt puckering exercise....a couple of times I am pretty certain they found a gun and for whatever reason decided not to make anything of it....I have known people who did pay fines dockside in cash, or so they claim, but I don't recall anyone ever being arrested for it....and there are very few US boats, at least back then, of the thousands a month who make the crossing, that aren't armed. This old boy needed a better hiding spot. He was probably ratted out but it could just be they figured anyone who crossed an ocean to get laid was probably toting contraband.

I have a friend who worked for an alphabet agency in the Caribbean from the early 80s through 2014. His job was that of a charter boat captain on a 60 foot Egg Harbor Sportfisherman. Boat was LOADED with fishing tackle and electronics....I would bet there was $250k worth of fishing tackle on board. My friend had never caught a fish in his life until he and I met in 2012 and he went fishing with me in Cuba. He had been working as a charter boat captain in the Caribbean for 32 years at that point. He also lived at GTMO on his personal sailboat....one of a handful of people who have ever been allowed to bring a personal boat to GTMO and live on it. He owned that boat but it was on lease to the agency he worked for and he would also sail around the Caribbean, on that agencies dime, posing as a sailing charter captain. Both of those boats were HEAVILY ARMED. Seriously armed...not just a couple of pistols and shotguns but enough military grade weaponry to outfit whatever the "sports" on board at the time might need to catch whatever fish they were fishing for. I mated on his sail boat from GTMO to Port Antonio, Jamaica once and did not think to ask about the weapons until we were about 4 hours south west of GTMO. He thought it was funny as hell that I thought it was possible that a boat, leased to the agency he worked for, would make port anywhere without being armed. Jamaican customs went over that boat with a fine tooth comb...didn't find a thing out of sorts. I asked Drew about it on the way back to GTMO and he said the only place that had ever found any weapons on that boat was West End Bahamas and they told him they'd keep the pistol until he left. He had a framed picture of him at a dock in Freeport, Bahamas, in hand cuffs standing in from of several tons of square grouper they "seized" on that sailboat in the early 80's. I imagine every customs agent in the Caribbean knew who and what he was after that but he continued to work at the same job for many years afterwards.