Armymann50

:GMT:

Today in History: February 16

1934 Thousands of Socialists battle Communists at a rally in New York's Madison Square Garden.

1945 American paratroopers land on Corregidor, in a campaign to liberate the Philippines.

1965 Four persons are held in a plot to blow up the Statue of Liberty, Liberty Bell and the Washington Monument.


Born on February 16

1852 Charles Taze Russell, founder of the International Bible Students Association which later became the Jehovah's Witnesses.


JOTD
A young guy from West Virginia moves to Florida and goes to a big "everything under one roof" department store looking for a job.

The Manager says, "Do you have any sales experience?" The kid says "Yeah. I was a vacuum salesman back in West Virginia ." Well, the boss was unsure, but he liked the kid and figured he'd give him a shot, so he gave him the job. "You start tomorrow. I'll come down after we close and see how you did."
His first day on the job was rough, but he got through it. After the store was locked up, the boss came down to the sales floor. "How many customers bought something from you today?" The kid frowns and looks at the floor and mutters, "One". The boss says "Just one?!!? Our sales people average sales to 20 to 30 customers a day. That will have to change, and soon, if you'd like to continue your employment here. We have very strict standards for our sales force here in Florida. One sale a day might have been acceptable in West Virginia, but you're not in the mines anymore, son."
The kid took his beating, but continued to look at his shoes, so the boss felt kinda bad for chewing him out on his first day. He asked (semi-sarcastically),"So, how much was your one sale for?" The kid looks up at his boss and says "$101,237.65". The boss, astonished, says $101,237.65?!? What the heck did you sell?"
The kid says, "Well, first, I sold him some new fish hooks. Then I sold him a new fishing rod to go with his new hooks. Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down the coast, so I told him he was going to need a boat, so we went down to the boat department and I sold him a twin engine Chris Craft. Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull it, so I took him down to the automotive department and sold him that 4x4 Expedition."
The boss said "A guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat and a TRUCK!?" The kid said "No, the guy came in here to buy tampons for his wife, and I said, "Dude, your weekend is fricked, perhaps you should go fishing".

Don't come back. :lol:

:GMT:

Guangzhou, Guangdong, China



this says it all

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season 2 of landman

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excellent choice frick the nfl

62

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Today in History: February 8

1587 Mary, Queen of Scots is beheaded in Fotheringhay Castle for her alleged part in the conspiracy to usurp Elizabeth I.

1861 Delegates from seceded states adopt a provisional Confederate Constitution.

1887 Congress passes the Dawes Act, which gives citizenship to Indians living apart from their tribe.

1910 The Boy Scouts of America is incorporated.

1924 The gas chamber is used for the first time to execute a murderer.

1943 British General Orde Wingate leads a guerrilla force of "Chindits" against the Japanese in Burma.

1952 Elizabeth becomes Queen of England after her father, King George VI, dies.

1971 South Vietnamese ground forces, backed by American air power, begin Operation Lam Son 719, a 17,000 man incursion into Laos that ends three weeks later in a disaster.

1990 CBS television temporarily suspends Andy Rooney for his anti-gay and ant-black remarks in a magazine interview.

2021 South Africa halts rollout of Oxford AstraZeneca COVID-19 vaccine after research into the South African variant showed no protection against mild and moderate illness

Born on February 8

1820 William T. Sherman, Union general in the American Civil War.

1828 Jules Verne, French novelist, one of the first writers of science fiction (Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea).

1834 Dmitri Ivanovich Medeleyev, Russian chemist, developed the periodic table of elements.

1931 James Dean, film actor and 1950s teenage icon (Rebel Without a Cause, East of Eden, Giant).


JOTD
BECOMING IRISH

Seven-year-old Mohammad entered his classroom in Dublin on the first day of school..
"What's your name?", asked the teacher.
"Mohammad," he replied.
"You're in Ireland now," replied the teacher, "so from now on you will be known as Mick."
Mohammad returned home after school. "How was your day, Mohammad?" his mother asked. "My name is not Mohammad. I'm in Ireland and now my name is Mick." "Are you ashamed of your name?" his mother asked. "Are you trying to dishonor your parents, your heritage, your religion? Shame on you!" And his mother beat the shite out of him. Then she called his father, who beat the shite out of him again.
The next day Mohammad returned to school.
The teacher saw all his fresh bruises.
"What happened to you, Mick?" she asked.
"Well, shortly after becoming an Irishman, I was attacked by two fricking Muslims

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Today in History: February 7

0457
A Thracian officer by the name of Leo is proclaimed as emperor of the East by the army general, Aspar, on the death of the Emperor Marcian.

1668
The Netherlands, England and Sweden conclude an alliance directed against Louis XIV of France.

1783
The Siege of Gibraltar, which was pursued by the Spanish and the French since July 24, 1779, is finally lifted.

1913
The Turks lose 5,000 men in a battle with the Bulgarian army in Gallipoli.

1926
Negro History Week, originated by Carter G. Woodson, is observed for the first time.

1944
The Germans launch a second attack against the Allied beachead at Anzio, Italy. They hoped to push the Allies back into the sea.

1963
The Mona Lisa is put on display at the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York.

1964
The British band The Beatles are greeted by 25,000 fans upon their arrival in the United States at JFK Airport.


Today in History: Born on February 7
1477
Sir Thomas More, English statesman and writer, famous for Utopia, later executed for refusing to accept Henry VIII as the head of the church.

1804
John Deere, farm equipment manufacturer

1812
Charles Dickens, prolific English novelist whose stories reflected life in Victorian England. Some of his more famous works include Oliver Twist, A Christmas Carol and A Tale of Two Cities.

1867
Laura Ingalls Wilder, author whose works were the basis for television's Little House on the Prairie.

JOTD
So there was this professional assassin that charged $10,000 per bullet.

A guy comes up to him in the bar one day and says, "Are you the guy who charges $10,000 a bullet?"

"Yup."

"What if you miss?"

He looks at the man, deadly serious. "I don't miss..."

"Okay, we'll I've got $20,000. I just found out my wife is having an affair with my best friend. They're at the motel together right now."

"Let's go," the assassin says.

So they drive to a store across the street from the motel and climb up on the roof. The assassin takes out his rifle and attaches the scope.

"They're in room 21. I want you to shoot her in the head, and I want you to blow his dick off."

The assassin looks through his scope. He keeps staring for several minutes, not taking the shot.

"Well? What are you waiting for!?" the husband asks.

"Hold on a minute. I think I can save you $10,000."

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up and shut down construction sites?

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bring it we will be fine

can you imagine the lay off that are happening in china?