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re: A good buddy called me asking for money yesterday. Update 6/12
Posted on 6/12/23 at 2:49 pm to Cosmo
Posted on 6/12/23 at 2:49 pm to Cosmo
quote:
Had dinner with them on Friday night. Money problems were not brought up. Acted like everything was normal. They were about to leave for a week in Orange Beach staying at Turquoise Place. Her parents were going and likely paying for that trip.
Who paid for dinner?
1
Posted on 6/12/23 at 3:16 pm to danilo
Separate checks
Posted on 6/12/23 at 3:22 pm to Cosmo
Was the the early bird special at Piccadilly or the Chef's Table at Commander's?
Posted on 6/12/23 at 3:24 pm to Cosmo
quote:
They were about to leave for a week in Orange Beach staying at Turquoise Place.
I could use that kind of money problems.
Posted on 6/12/23 at 3:24 pm to Cosmo
quote:
Update 6/12
Had dinner with them on Friday night. Money problems were not brought up. Acted like everything was normal. They were about to leave for a week in Orange Beach staying at Turquoise Place. Her parents were going and likely paying for that trip.
I don't think I ever knew if you had given him any money or not? If so, did they pay you back?
If those answers are yes and no, I'd be furious that they were going on vacation right now.
Posted on 6/12/23 at 3:28 pm to Cosmo
Sounds like that baw is living beyond his means. Wait til they start repoing his toys. 
Posted on 6/12/23 at 3:30 pm to CocomoLSU
quote:
I don't think I ever knew if you had given him any money or not? If so, did they pay you back? If those answers are yes and no, I'd be furious that they were going on vacation right now.
That’s the worst part about the scenario, it tends to make the giver/lender the de facto trustee or auditor of the recipient, which can be problematic and awkward.
I’d say if giving, give and forget about. If lending, keep it simple and clear with specific date(s) for repayments or at least updates on progress.
Posted on 6/12/23 at 3:45 pm to TygerTyger
quote:
That's not a terrible idea.
Judging from the description of this fella, It's probably not a piece of shite boat either.
Posted on 6/12/23 at 3:57 pm to Cosmo
I'm not going to read this whole thread.....but, my rule is this:
If you loan someone under $2,000, expect that you may never see that money again. It's a gift versus a loan.
If over $2,000, I have them sign a contract. Period. Even family.
Your friend seems to have a spending problem. I don't believe you will get paid back. Ever.
If the amount is low enough that you can afford to NOT get paid back, go for it. Otherwise....I believe this guy is juggling debt for debt. My advice? Say no.
If your friendship is based on your money to him, it's not a friendship.
If you loan someone under $2,000, expect that you may never see that money again. It's a gift versus a loan.
If over $2,000, I have them sign a contract. Period. Even family.
Your friend seems to have a spending problem. I don't believe you will get paid back. Ever.
If the amount is low enough that you can afford to NOT get paid back, go for it. Otherwise....I believe this guy is juggling debt for debt. My advice? Say no.
If your friendship is based on your money to him, it's not a friendship.
Posted on 6/12/23 at 4:23 pm to WAR TIGER
quote:
Love the guy and his wife but will admit they are the classic 80-90k millionaires that the OT talks about. He drives a new f150. She drives a 2 year old Yukon XL. Big into their kids sports and spend a ton of money doing that half their weekends. Kids in private school. 2 or 3 vacations a year. Has 2 boats and a side by side. Eat out all the time.
Insurance premiums now going up. Other bills going up. Salary isnt.
I could tell it hurt him to call. I asked him what lifestyle changes is he making. He basically said nothing yet, just gotta get through this stretch. I said I would only consider helping him if he helps himself first and shows me he is cutting back, selling some stuff. He gets kinda angry at this point like Im accusing him of something. Calms down and we just kinda end it. Hope I didnt lose a friend.
did the friend ever actually ask the OP for money or just talk about his expenses? if he didn't actually ask for help, that might explain his anger.
Posted on 6/12/23 at 5:17 pm to CocomoLSU
quote:
If those answers are yes and no, I'd be furious that they were going on vacation right now.
Exactly. That’s why I never lend people money
Posted on 6/12/23 at 5:24 pm to Cosmo
The insurance thing is really kicking people in the dick
Posted on 6/12/23 at 6:32 pm to O
quote:
The fastest way to lose a friend is to loan them money.
Also a good way to get rid of an unwanted “friend.”
Posted on 6/14/23 at 5:25 am to Cosmo
Did he make it through the stretch?
Posted on 6/14/23 at 7:26 am to WAR TIGER
man maybe i have a weird family or group of friends...but i have never ever ever been asked to loan money or asked someone to loan to me. so weird.
Posted on 10/6/23 at 10:22 pm to Cosmo
My BIL needed $3k for his son's dorm and my wife, (no pics) and I "loaned" him the $3K. He assured us he was gonna pay us back really quick. This was in mid August. He posted a FB pic of him and his wife at the MSU LSU game all decked out in LSU gear. I talked to him a few days later and he told me they had free tickets. Ok so I let it go. I called him this evening about his Mom's house we, (I) are cleaning out and he said, "hey man we're out to eat..in Orange Beach, I thought what the fing hell. I got off the phone and told my wife, shite we're financing his vacation. Oh well live and learn. I'm the dumbass, but it was for a good cause for my nephew. Like they say don't loan money to friends or family and expect it back. BIL did call me back and said he would start paying me $200/month. I guess that's something...we shall see.
Posted on 10/6/23 at 10:35 pm to bpinson
Does your wife feel the spending problem lies in her brother or in his wife?
Posted on 10/6/23 at 10:38 pm to TDFreak
quote:
in his wife
There’s your repayment plan, baw.
Posted on 10/6/23 at 10:40 pm to bpinson
quote:
BIL did call me back and said he would start paying me $200/month. I guess that's something...we shall see.
Write that shite off. Anytime I “loan” money to someone I consider it a gift and have no expectation of being paid back. Best practice is to not “loan” money you’ll miss or expect other people to do the right thing. If he’s the type to “borrow” money in the first place, you knew better than to expect to be repaid.
Posted on 10/6/23 at 10:40 pm to TDFreak
Both, it is what it is. I made the choice to help my nephew and my BIL well we shall see if I get my money back. I probably will cause I ain't letting him skate.
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