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re: What dark secret are you hiding from everyone?
Posted on 7/17/23 at 10:13 pm to SECdragonmaster
Posted on 7/17/23 at 10:13 pm to SECdragonmaster
quote:
In 2004, my wife and I bought a 10-pack of fresh tortillas from the Mexican grocery store where they are made daily. They were so fresh and tasty looking that I ate a couple of them when we got home. That night we had fajitas for the two of us and she noticed that two were missing. Instead of admitting that I scarfed down two of them, I acted like I didn't know why they were missing and led her to believe the store shorted us two tortillas. Decades later, every time we buy a pack of fresh tortillas - She counts them to make sure they are all there. For some reason, I can't come clean and tell her.
I tried to do this when I drunkenly backed over my wife’s flowerbed and swore it wasn’t me and it must have been one of our friends or the workers putting our new roof on. Thought she would let it go but she was about to bitch out a lot of people so I finally had to come clean
1
Posted on 7/17/23 at 10:15 pm to wfallstiger
quote:
Nothing
Good for you Jesus.
Posted on 7/17/23 at 10:16 pm to SECdragonmaster
quote:
Decades later, every time we buy a pack of fresh tortillas - She counts them to make sure they are all there. For some reason, I can't come clean and tell her.
Better take that to the grave. You tell her now and it will be what else you have kept from her for 20 years
Posted on 7/17/23 at 10:17 pm to deltaland
quote:
I tried to do this when I drunkenly backed over my wife’s flowerbed and swore it wasn’t me and it must have been one of our friends or the workers putting our new roof on. Thought she would let it go but she was about to bitch out a lot of people so I finally had to come clean
That is straight hardcore bruh. How do you live with yourself.
Posted on 7/17/23 at 10:23 pm to TigerBaron
I am as old as the earth. I am older than dirt. So many years, so much heartache. Frankly I am tired of it, but the guy down the street came into being 10 minutes before I did. He was #1 and I was #2. He has always been a butthole about it and I'd like to beat his record so I keep on getting up each day.
Glad I got that off my chest.
Glad I got that off my chest.
Posted on 7/17/23 at 10:43 pm to TigerBaron
I mixed up all this fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this.
And then, I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. And I never felt so bad in my entire life!
And then, I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. And I never felt so bad in my entire life!
Posted on 7/17/23 at 11:11 pm to TigerBaron
I actually had a fight at sonic. Come at me.
Posted on 7/17/23 at 11:15 pm to TigerBaron
I'm a drag queen that performs in front of children at public libraries
Posted on 7/17/23 at 11:37 pm to msudawg1200
years ago we lived in a neighborhood that had many roaming cats until i captured them in a cage and transported them to a gravel road near Slaughter which was on my way to work. my wife said “u noticed the cats don’t poop in our carport anymore?”. I said “i have noticed that”.
Posted on 7/17/23 at 11:44 pm to TigerBaron
A little over a month ago, I was hanging out in St. John’s, Canada enjoying a post workout massage by the coastline when all of a sudden the batteries to my massage gun went dead. I saw there was a shipyard close by and I snuck in. I found this gaming console remote hanging by this submersible vehicle and decided to swap the batteries out with my massage gun. I figured it must have belong to some brat billionaire’s kid so they can afford to replace the batteries.
Posted on 7/18/23 at 12:29 am to TutHillTiger
Ok I admit I have a deal with the others, and when they take over I am going to serve as the warden, I mean the leader/ruler of one of the large Southern work camps, I mean safe cities, for the survivors, I mean volunteers.
Posted on 7/18/23 at 7:36 am to TigerBaron
I'm not really confused.
Posted on 7/18/23 at 8:36 am to TigerBaron
I helped arrange a fake abduction.
Posted on 7/18/23 at 8:40 am to SECdragonmaster
Hilarious
Posted on 7/18/23 at 8:43 am to Gorilla Ball
Every time my wife gets a couple cans of whip cream from the store I give it a couple days before I make them useless after doing whip its. Been a few years and I still tell her that man they always go bad or quit working so quickly. She agrees and is in a constant exchange policy with Walmart for them.
Posted on 7/18/23 at 8:47 am to TigerBaron
While in college I worked in a warehouse and drove a forklift. I had just gotten to work was trying to be fancy and a knocked the shite out of some large freezer doors.
I left the area thinking oh shite how am I gonna fix this.
One of the managers noticed it and chewed out 2 of my buddies that worked in the area. I did help them fix it, but I felt like an arse for not admitting it was my fault.
I did buy them lunch at break but I couldn’t confess that it was my frickup
I left the area thinking oh shite how am I gonna fix this.
One of the managers noticed it and chewed out 2 of my buddies that worked in the area. I did help them fix it, but I felt like an arse for not admitting it was my fault.
I did buy them lunch at break but I couldn’t confess that it was my frickup
Posted on 7/18/23 at 8:49 am to TigerBaron
I was standing behind Oswald and bumped his shoulder as he was pulling the trigger for his 3rd shot.
Posted on 7/18/23 at 9:01 am to TigerBaron
Screw it. I lost a stressful, high paying job, because I became an alcoholic, and addicted to cocaine.
Told my wife that it was related to me drinking on the job, but didn't tell her the rest. As it turns out, losing this job was the best thing to happen to me. It allowed me to reset my life and career. I had to work from the bottom but I'm slowly working my way back up to the top.
Told my wife that it was related to me drinking on the job, but didn't tell her the rest. As it turns out, losing this job was the best thing to happen to me. It allowed me to reset my life and career. I had to work from the bottom but I'm slowly working my way back up to the top.
Posted on 7/18/23 at 9:01 am to TigerBaron
quote:
What dark secret are you hiding from everyone?
Also, while you're at it, post the locations of inspections stations that give them out regardless of tint, cat converter failure and other violations.
Posted on 7/18/23 at 9:06 am to TigerBaron
I travel for work and have stole 1-2 of the hotel hangers for the better part of 10 years to where my whole family has nothing but the nice wooden ones throughout the whole house.
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