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re: Nursing homes are so depressing

Posted on 5/29/26 at 11:36 pm to
Posted by Red Stick Tigress
Tiger Stadium
Member since Nov 2005
20890 posts
Posted on 5/29/26 at 11:36 pm to
quote:

euthanasia


Isn't that basically what late life hospice is? My dad was over 91 and died 18 hours after morphine was initiated at 2.5 mg? every three hours.

4 doses and he was dead. I don't think he woke up to get dosed the morning after it was begun.
Posted by CaptainsWafer
TD Platinum Member
Member since Feb 2006
59336 posts
Posted on 5/29/26 at 11:37 pm to
quote:

He told me one time, "I don't have anybody I can reminisce with any more."


I think that’s how my FIL felt. My MIL was a special lady and had plenty of friends. My FIL went a long with her on a lot of the things she did but he was basically friendless without her.






I was worried about my dad when he retired after seeing and interacting with people every day for 42 years, but he’s been super active. Plays golf 3 days a week and shot an 84 (from the old man tees) last week. Don’t think he’s shot in the 80s in like 30 years. I thought he may end up just sitting at home doing nothing but he never misses anything my kids do unless he’s already committed to something for either of my siblings kids.
Posted by Jim Rockford
Member since May 2011
105352 posts
Posted on 5/29/26 at 11:46 pm to
quote:

Isn't that basically what late life hospice is? My dad was over 91 and died 18 hours after morphine was initiated at 2.5 mg? every three hours.

4 doses and he was dead. I don't think he woke up to get dosed the morning after it was begun.


IYAM the big hole in the hospice paradigm is the dementia catch 22. Here are the medicare guidelines for qualifying for hospice with dementia.

quote:

Medicare Hospice Benefit Guidelines can help in determining eligibility for hospice care for
people living with advanced dementia. To be eligible for hospice, people with advanced dementia
should meet both of the following criteria:
Functional Assessment Staging Tool (FAST): Patient must be at or beyond stage 7c and show
all of the features of stages 6a-7c.
? Stage 6a: Cannot dress without assistance
? Stage 6b: Cannot bathe without assistance
? Stage 6c: Cannot toilet without assistance
? Stage 6d: Incontinent of urine occasionally or frequently
? Stage 6e: Incontinent of bowel occasionally or frequently
? Stage 7a: Speech limited to fewer than 6 intelligible words during an average day
? Stage 7b: Speech limited to a single intelligible word during an average day
? Stage 7c: Unable to ambulate independently
? Stage 7d: Cannot sit up independently
? Stage 7e: Cannot smile
? Stage 7f: Cannot hold head up independently
Medical conditions: Patients must have had at least 1 of these listed medical conditions over
the prior year.
? Aspiration pneumonia
? Pyelonephritis or other upper urinary tract infection
? Septicemia
? Pressure ulcer, multiple, stage 3-4
? Recurrent fever after treatment with antibiotics
? Eating problems such that fluid or food intake is insufficient to sustain life (or, if tube fed, weight loss 10%
over prior 6 months or serum albumin <2.5 g/dL)


By that point you're essentially a shell and have already suffered for months, if not years. If people in the early stages want to exit with some of their mental capacity and dignity left, they should have that choice.
Posted by Red Stick Tigress
Tiger Stadium
Member since Nov 2005
20890 posts
Posted on 5/30/26 at 12:02 am to
I agree. My dad had none of those.

He was Dxd with congestive heart failure and sisterwitch decided to hospice him. CGH can last years.
Posted by Inadvertent Whistle
Atlanta, GA
Member since Nov 2015
5477 posts
Posted on 5/30/26 at 12:02 am to
My wife has written permission to put a pillow over my face the minute I can't wipe my own arse. I mean it too. On the other hand, I would suffer anything to take care of her or my parents.
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