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re: Need marital advice from the gurus of the OT

Posted on 1/12/20 at 11:27 pm to
Posted by BoardReader
Arkansas
Member since Dec 2007
7414 posts
Posted on 1/12/20 at 11:27 pm to
A fertile woman who wants a 2nd kid will have one; whether or not you are a participant is optional.
Posted by tiger114
Fairhope, AL
Member since Sep 2009
5236 posts
Posted on 1/12/20 at 11:28 pm to
quote:

Also, in two years you can have two kids, a wife, and a house. Or you can have none of that. Your call.

This is what I look forward to when serious questions come up. Someone just spits straight truth. You should listen to this guy, OP. You’ll be thankful that you did in 30 years when you are dancing at your 2nd son/daughter’s wedding.
Posted by tiger114
Fairhope, AL
Member since Sep 2009
5236 posts
Posted on 1/12/20 at 11:29 pm to
quote:

A fertile woman who wants a 2nd kid will have one; whether or not you are a participant is optional.

And then there are people like this... he’s not wrong either. Just less eloquent.
Posted by go_tigres
Member since Sep 2013
5494 posts
Posted on 1/13/20 at 6:32 pm to
Sorry, closed door negotiations
Posted by llfshoals
Member since Nov 2010
21035 posts
Posted on 1/13/20 at 8:57 pm to
You can do one of three things.

Have a 2nd child and be unhappy because you’re determined to be.

Have a 2nd child and enjoy it.

Get divorced. Because when mama ain’t happy, nobody’s happy. Go ahead and get ready for a lot of misery if that’s the path you choose, because sooner or later you’ll figure out being a selfish prick wasn’t such a hot idea.
Posted by Shunface
Lafayette County Detention Center
Member since Jan 2013
5571 posts
Posted on 1/13/20 at 8:59 pm to
Congrats on the second kid
Posted by olgoi khorkhoi
priapism survivor
Member since May 2011
17072 posts
Posted on 1/14/20 at 1:53 am to
quote:

Wife is dead set on having a second kid I'm dead set against it.




So you plan on only using your penis for its intended purpose once in your lifetime? Stop being a pussy and give your wife another child and your kid a sibling. No kid should have to grow up without a brother or sister.
Posted by cave canem
pullarius dominus
Member since Oct 2012
12186 posts
Posted on 1/14/20 at 2:07 am to
Get her pregnant and leave her, that way you both are happy.
Posted by SoulGlo
Shinin' Through
Member since Dec 2011
17248 posts
Posted on 1/14/20 at 2:19 am to
Is she hot? My wife wanted a girl after having 3 sons. What won the argument?

"Do you really want to risk that body?"



"No."









Done.
Posted by oleheat
Sportsman's Paradise
Member since Mar 2007
14866 posts
Posted on 1/14/20 at 7:38 am to

Oh my God.

Posted by SuperSaint
Sorting Out OT BS Since '2007'
Member since Sep 2007
151568 posts
Posted on 1/14/20 at 7:53 am to
Explain thel lifetime of pain and ridicule the child will ensure by growing up an Arkansas fan.
Posted by CelticDog
Member since Apr 2015
42867 posts
Posted on 1/14/20 at 8:57 am to
Chances of unfortunate birth defects are doubled for you two.

Neither are at optimum now.

She needs more to do.
Couple therapy to start.
Then she needs to serve others. Get more education.
Posted by BayBengal9
Bay St. Louis, MS
Member since Nov 2019
4171 posts
Posted on 1/14/20 at 9:09 am to
quote:

You can do one of three things.

Have a 2nd child and be unhappy because you’re determined to be.

Have a 2nd child and enjoy it.

Get divorced. Because when mama ain’t happy, nobody’s happy. Go ahead and get ready for a lot of misery if that’s the path you choose, because sooner or later you’ll figure out being a selfish prick wasn’t such a hot idea.


This.

I'm a few years younger than you with a two and a half year old. The wife has talked about possibly wanting a second child in a year or two... I'm not really into it, but that's how things go.

Let me also post a philosophical point for you to consider: Do you love your current child enough that you are going to make things work with the wife to provide him/her a stable family life and home (and having a sibling won't be bad for them, either)? Or are you so deadset against having another child that you're going to have your current child grow up with some other dude, who may or may not be a piece of shite... and they'll still end up having a half-brother or sister, anyway?

I think you probably already know the reality of the situation... and the most difficult lesson I have had to accept as a husband, and now father, is that being a strong man, and "head of the family" for the two most important girls in my life usually involves putting my desires and needs 2nd after what is most important for them.
This post was edited on 1/14/20 at 9:10 am
Posted by Evil Little Thing
Member since Jul 2013
11638 posts
Posted on 1/14/20 at 1:18 pm to
My husband wanted a 2nd kid. His wife at the time did not & got her tubes tied. They divorced (partly because of that), and now I’m pregnant with his 2nd kid.

If she’s late 30s, she’s getting too old to leave you & start over with someone else. But it sounds like she will resent the hell out of you for the rest of your lives. Not fun.
Posted by hawgndodge
Member since Jun 2009
5448 posts
Posted on 1/14/20 at 1:40 pm to
Foster care adoption is free
Posted by bobaftt1212
Hills of TN
Member since Mar 2013
1418 posts
Posted on 1/14/20 at 2:01 pm to
I had a second kid at 35 and now I am divorced with 2 kids instead of one soooooooooooooo
Posted by Mr Perfect
Member since Mar 2010
17836 posts
Posted on 1/14/20 at 2:03 pm to
quote:

 husband wanted a 2nd kid. His wife at the time did not & got her tubes tied. They divorced (partly because of that), and now I’m pregnant with his 2nd kid.

If she’s late 30s, she’s getting too old to leave you & start over with someone else.


can't stand trashy ppl
Posted by Evil Little Thing
Member since Jul 2013
11638 posts
Posted on 1/14/20 at 2:08 pm to
quote:

can't stand trashy ppl


Posted by GusMcRae
Deep in the heart of the Big Sleazy
Member since Oct 2008
3835 posts
Posted on 1/14/20 at 2:58 pm to
Puuleeeease. I know a woman that had a kid at age 51.

And is having to change diapers your main issue?
Posted by Havoc
Member since Nov 2015
39566 posts
Posted on 1/14/20 at 3:46 pm to
Enjoy having constant get-pregnant sex for a while. And then rarely. Again.
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