re: Locking the door while doing the dirty

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We always told the kids we were wrapping Christmas presents

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even in January?

Josh nailed it.

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reduce the rate of sexual activity

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couple that I know were caught in the act by their 7 - 8 year old nephew. They found out the next morning when the child said that he saw Uncle John on top of Aunt Jane "hugging" her.

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Friend of ours got walked in on and later kid asked what they were doing. Mom said ‘wrestling’ and kids asked why Mommy was on top. She responded ‘Because Mommy was WINNING!’

My oldest daughter appeared bedside one night a said,"STOP HURTING MY MOMMY!"
Killed the mood for 5 minutes.

Your wife actually reverse cowgirl?

Lol. Even with tv on, they gonna stand outside door and here uh uh uh. Daddy, what were you doing to momma? Yall were doing something sus. Momma was going uh uh uh. Son, do you stand outside the door sometimes when mommies and daddy need to talk. Yeah, sometimes. (Facepalm). Well son, daddy gives momma a back massage sometimes that feels really good. Sigh smh

Kids are 5 and 8. Wife just locked the door

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Locking the door while doing the dirty

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Reminds me of a couple of quick memories. When my oldest brother got out of the service he got married and he and his new bride took over my room for a month before they moved into their new home. One day I accidentally walked in on them and they were both under the covers so I couldn't see them but I clearly heard my brother say before I was able to close the door " Lick it and stick it. NO, lick it and stick it." Later I told my mother that I accidently walked in on them and asked her what he meant by lick it and stick it and without missing a beat mom said he was probably teaching her how to mail an envelope.
This one comes from my wife. For her 9th birthday she received amongst other things several accessories to update the new bike she received for Christmas. New baskets and handlebar mounted horn and bell and a head light and reflectors. She spent the day proudly riding around the neighborhood on her fully accessorized bike.
Late that night she was awoken by pounding on the wall and muffled laughter from her parents room along with honking and ringing noises off and on that kept her awake for more than a couple of hours until she finally dropped off to sleep. The next morning she awoke to her bell and horn and nothing else missing from her bicycle. When she told her parents that the bell and horn were missing they denied knowing anything about it and she said the following week a different horn and bell reappeared.
When she told them about the new bell and horn her father told her it must have been magic.

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Huey Lewes…..you have been reported to admin WTF is wrong with you Assholes disrespecting someone’s Mother or Wife My opinion…. You are a bunch of cowards hiding behind a key board

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She's not gonna frick you, buddy.

Older kids and they always linger or stay up. We lock the door, but they are smart enough to know what that means. I’m thinking we just lock the door any time that it’s closed to throw them off.