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re: How many of your friends are happy with their marriage?
Posted on 11/8/21 at 5:07 am to Darth_Vader
Posted on 11/8/21 at 5:07 am to Darth_Vader
quote:
The problem with most marriages today is people don’t understand what it means to love someone
Eh. People do.
The difference today is that divorce and separation have become more socially acceptable so people don’t stay in shitty marriages. As well as living together before marriage.
0
Posted on 11/8/21 at 5:14 am to Eli Goldfinger
While it isn’t always sunshine and rainbows, I have been happily married for 8 years. I only have two friends that truly seemed unhappy and they got divorced.
Posted on 11/8/21 at 5:20 am to MSTiger33
I love my wife, she can be crazy like any of them… will be 14 years together… she is beautiful, still find her sexy. Sure sex could be more often but I don’t want anyone else nor have considered it
Posted on 11/8/21 at 5:34 am to Eli Goldfinger
quote:
I went hunting with a buddy yesterday and he spent 3/4 of the drive time and dinner complaining about his wife.
You need new friends. Tell him to grow a pair and deal with it. That’s life. People are such pussies these days. They’d rather just quit and run away than fix things. Exactly why it’s not totally weird when people get a divorce or abortion. It’s become normal to most in society. Not me.
What do you know Toby? Your answer to everything is get a divorce.
This post was edited on 11/8/21 at 5:36 am
Posted on 11/8/21 at 5:52 am to turnpiketiger
3/6 are in turmoil at the moment. 2 are fully separated. One they are basically roommates.
Posted on 11/8/21 at 6:58 am to PowerTool
quote:
FTR, my wife and I are the only ones of our combined siblings ( me 2, her 1) that are not divorced.
I'm the youngest of 5 kids and only one of my siblings had both married and stayed married.
Can't help wondering if our parents had something to do with that. They probably should have gotten divorced at some point a long time ago.
I should have also mentioned that both my wife and my parents never divorced. And were/ are generally happily married.
Posted on 11/8/21 at 7:03 am to Eli Goldfinger
All my married bros have ups and downs
But most are married to spicy Latinas and there is never a dull moment so that always keeps it interesting
But most are married to spicy Latinas and there is never a dull moment so that always keeps it interesting
Posted on 11/8/21 at 7:04 am to bulldog95
quote:you people have got to stop blaming everything on social media. the divorce rate was much higher before social media became mainstream.
The rise of social media is the downfall of the modern marriage.
Posted on 11/8/21 at 7:05 am to Eli Goldfinger
I have friends that have vented on me in the past about their wives. For example, one guy I mountain biked w would complain about his wife for 30 mins, get it all out, then move on. It's just the way some people are wired. Other guys never complain.
How many are happy? That's subjective. I think most that have been married 20 years plus are content. But are they close? Not really. Alot of them don't sleep in the same beds and some spend significant time apart. Could I be in the situation alot of them are? No, I want more out of life. It's why I got divorced 12-14 years ago, completely changed my life for the better (now with a woman I love and who is my best friend).
Some my friends told me when I got divorced that while they may not be "happy", they were terrified of re-entering the whole dating scene. The devil you know...
How many are happy? That's subjective. I think most that have been married 20 years plus are content. But are they close? Not really. Alot of them don't sleep in the same beds and some spend significant time apart. Could I be in the situation alot of them are? No, I want more out of life. It's why I got divorced 12-14 years ago, completely changed my life for the better (now with a woman I love and who is my best friend).
Some my friends told me when I got divorced that while they may not be "happy", they were terrified of re-entering the whole dating scene. The devil you know...
Posted on 11/8/21 at 7:07 am to GreatLakesTiger24
marriage rate has also dropped. It is about 40% of what it was at the apex of the marriage rate, post WW2.
This post was edited on 11/8/21 at 7:09 am
Posted on 11/8/21 at 7:12 am to Eli Goldfinger
Social media has turn society on its head. Women live in this digital space and I mean literally they exist online more than they do in reality. Their happiness is tied to the optics of their various social media accounts.
Posted on 11/8/21 at 7:12 am to The Third Leg
100% true. no denying that and i usually point to this when people mention the falling divorce rate as an indicator of things getting better. this doesn't have much to do with my point re: social media though.
it has become such a boogeyman and it's pretty silly.
it has become such a boogeyman and it's pretty silly.
Posted on 11/8/21 at 7:17 am to Eli Goldfinger
My married friends all seem happy, but most have only been married for ~a year or so.
Posted on 11/8/21 at 7:33 am to Eli Goldfinger
Here’s the deal and I suspect that I’m more than 90% right about this-
Wives become mothers once they get kids and the husband become an afterthought. The attention that the husband used to get, goes away and generally the ego gets bruised and problems start. People want instant gratification these days and the rough patches are harder to stomach so longterm commitments get challenged.
Most couples don’t realize this going in and then they become blindsided when it happens. The male generally gets pissed off and the wives get annoyed at the angry guy that used to be “fun”.
These guys can either wait it out because things will change or they can go get some couples counseling which will explain what is happening and then they can work on it - or not…
Fwiw, I speak from experience and most of my friends are on their second marriage.
Wives become mothers once they get kids and the husband become an afterthought. The attention that the husband used to get, goes away and generally the ego gets bruised and problems start. People want instant gratification these days and the rough patches are harder to stomach so longterm commitments get challenged.
Most couples don’t realize this going in and then they become blindsided when it happens. The male generally gets pissed off and the wives get annoyed at the angry guy that used to be “fun”.
These guys can either wait it out because things will change or they can go get some couples counseling which will explain what is happening and then they can work on it - or not…
Fwiw, I speak from experience and most of my friends are on their second marriage.
This post was edited on 11/8/21 at 7:40 am
Posted on 11/8/21 at 7:36 am to Eli Goldfinger
quote:
All of these guys are good people, good fathers, good providers, and not at all bad husbands.
Two sides to every story, and they’re your friends. But as a couple of others have said, social media is ruinous to relationships and expectations. It is seriously cancerous. No one knows how to get dirty and properly deal with relationship challenges when they come up - they look at so-and-so on social media and see they’re living it up on vacation, or they think they want something like they see online but they really don’t know what they want, or they’re used to getting instant gratification, or they’re used to being catered to and the “what can I get from this right now” Netflix consumerism mindset and always putting their own needs above others. It’s very sad.
I believe that the stat has risen to fifty percent of marriages (or at least very close) now end in divorce.
Marriage is a really beautiful and powerful thing when built correctly.
Posted on 11/8/21 at 7:44 am to fallguy_1978
I need pic's or the full story. 8 times seems crazy, please explain.
Posted on 11/8/21 at 7:45 am to Eli Goldfinger
Me and my friends are for the most part happy with just the occasional bitching about annoying she she does.
I do have one friend however who is married to one of the most insufferable people I've ever met. We've actually stopped inviting him anywhere to avoid seeing her. I can't imagine his life is happy
I do have one friend however who is married to one of the most insufferable people I've ever met. We've actually stopped inviting him anywhere to avoid seeing her. I can't imagine his life is happy
Posted on 11/8/21 at 7:49 am to Eli Goldfinger
(no message)
This post was edited on 11/8/21 at 8:17 am
Posted on 11/8/21 at 8:10 am to Eli Goldfinger
Think the national divorce rate is around 50%. Unhappiness rate is probably a good chunk higher, but plenty of people deal with that to preserve stability and family (and money). Weird world we live in
Posted on 11/8/21 at 8:24 am to SlidellCajun
quote:
Wives become mothers once they get kids and the husband become an afterthought. The attention that the husband used to get, goes away and generally the ego gets bruised and problems start.
That's why it is important to "always date" your spouse and carve out alone time weekly.
It's easier said than done. I understand the basic need to take care of a child. I agree with it. However, the lack of focus and attention on your spouse, who helped you create the child you have together, will crumble because the foundation is on shaky ground due to a lack of attentiveness, priority, and selfishness.
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