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re: Funny College Roommate Stories?

Posted on 9/11/19 at 5:22 pm to
Posted by baldona
Florida
Member since Feb 2016
20386 posts
Posted on 9/11/19 at 5:22 pm to
I had an airsoft pistol from Korea my dad bought me when I was like 8 before Airsoft was even a thing. You had to cock it between each shot but it shot hard as hell. My sophomore year we had a recliner in our living room corner and our kitchen, couch, and table on the other side of the room. We played American Gladiators every time we drank, one person would sit in the recliner and the other would start at our front door and try to make it to the bedroom off the living room without being shot.

Girls didn't like the game very much, imagine that...
Posted by jimmy the leg
Member since Aug 2007
33999 posts
Posted on 9/11/19 at 6:23 pm to
quote:

Lived with a Chinaman one year. Me and my Louisiana buddy noticed that there were often soiled toilet paper wads in the wastebasket next to the toilet. We knew it was him, but we didn’t want to overtly accuse him, so we had a “house conversation” where we just let “everyone” know that from now on, we’re instituting a “new” rule that we’d all flush toilet paper down the toilet.


Was there a tariff on flushing?
Posted by WaydownSouth
Stratton Oakmont
Member since Nov 2018
8128 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 12:11 am to
Roommate snuck into my room while he thought I was taking a nap. I didn’t move, but opened one eye. The fricker went into my bathroom and stole 2 rolls of toilet paper and never put them back
This post was edited on 9/12/19 at 8:58 am
Posted by Bama and Beer
Baldwin Co, AL
Member since Oct 2010
80867 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 2:03 am to
I pissed on my computer in college. Woke up in my suite mates bed when he was out of town. Lit a bag of shite (legit shite) on my teammates front porch. Knocked on the door and ran off. Puked out of the back of a 4 Runner going 75mph down the interstate. Puked up carrots while stretching around all my baseball team.
Posted by Rossberg02
Member since Jun 2016
2591 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 4:33 am to
Mine would randomly wake me up with surprises while drunk as shite:

Story 1: walked me out to our apartment parking lot at 3am to show me the entire front end of his Malibu smashed to pieces.

Story 2: woke me and my gf up to to show us how he punched holes in his bedroom wall

Story 3: woke me up to come pick him up from the bar, except he wasn’t at the bar he was in the drainage ditch/woods across the street covered head to toe in algae/water grass
Posted by jbgleason
Bailed out of BTR to God's Country
Member since Mar 2012
18893 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 5:24 am to
My roommate and I lived in one of the fraternity houses on E. Lakeshore Drive back in the day. He had an old school fire extinguisher you could fill with water and pressurize with an air hose. A regular event would be to fill it with water, load up in the car with some beer, roll over to the gas station and pressurize it, then drive around campus and spray joggers. Harmless fun.

We come back from a trip spraying people and half of LSU PD comes screaming up and throws all of the guys in the car on the ground. Everyone is wondering what happened when an undercover PD guy pulls up on a bicycle soaking wet. We had no clue they had guys in plain clothes out riding around campus. He was fricking pissed.

A supervisor eventually pulls up and tells him to let everyone go.
Posted by diablo blanco
Oakdale, Louisiana
Member since Dec 2007
1080 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 6:48 am to
So, back in dinosaur times, registration was held in the P Mac and the field house. My roommate and I lived in Hodges Hall. Somehow, between the field house and Hodges, he lost everything. His ID, class schedule, fee bill, parking tag, everything! He had no idea when or where any of his classes were for two weeks. Oh, and he could not eat in the cafeteria because he had no ID.

Plus, he had absolutely no money. Would sell his plasma on Fridays to buy gas, cigarettes and beer for the trip home. I came back to the dorm room one night and he was sitting in his bed eating a Domino's pizza. I asked how he bought the pizza and he said he had written a check for it. When I replied I wasn't aware he had a checking account, he said he had written one of my checks.

Another time he went down on a Monday morning and said he could not find his car. Said he parked it right behind the dorm, between the dorm and the stadium but it wasn't where he left it. When I asked him if he remembered what happened in the stadium the previous Saturday, he said, "Um, a football game?" I said, "Bingo!" He sold plasma twice that week to get the car out of the tow lot.

He can't still be alive.
Posted by atrain5
Baton Rouge Correctional Facility
Member since Sep 2017
2209 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 7:08 am to
Old roommate came back to the dorm fricked up one night. He climbed up to his bed, and as i was about to pass out, i hear just a loud smack on the floor. He fell out of his bunk and faceplanted into a cinderblock on the ground by his bed... needless to say i had to drive him to the ER to get stitched up well
Posted by Dale Doubak
Somewhere
Member since Jan 2012
6000 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 7:13 am to
So not one funny story?
Posted by yurintroubl
Dallas, Tx.
Member since Apr 2008
30160 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 7:18 am to
quote:

So not one funny story?

Generally speaking - I was the funny roommate. But this thread is not about me...
Posted by CajunCommander
FloodZone
Member since Jan 2015
1843 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 7:27 am to
This one time CP3 got too drunk and rolled out of my dorm room bunk bed (6’ high). It was funny until he started having a seizure.

Threw him in a cold shower and everything was fine.
Posted by Blaeke
Member since Dec 2016
1019 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 8:53 am to
My roommate would walk around naked and spin his dick in my face. One day I got tired of him doing this so I grabbed his dick and said, "If you don't stop, I'm going to bite it off!"
Posted by ManBearTiger
BRLA
Member since Jun 2007
21827 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 9:02 am to
Woke up hungover AF after a night in tigerland grinding up on bitches. Roommate was bare arse naked sprawled out on the floor and bleeding from his assholes. Got so krunk neither of us remembered even going out, but knowing us, we pulled some top notch poon fa sho. there were spent 'doms e'rywhere

College man, so tight butthole
This post was edited on 9/12/19 at 9:08 am
Posted by JackieTreehorn
Malibu
Member since Sep 2013
29030 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 9:04 am to
One of my roommates would eat all of my frozen foods, pizzas etc and then re-tape the empty box and turn it around backwards in the freezer to make it look like I still had food. Sorry fricker. Lol
Posted by Rooco
Member since May 2012
486 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 9:13 am to
Freshman year. My potluck roommate was chill and only drank in moderation. Over the course of the year, he gets shitfaced drunk, high, tripping on shrooms, you name it, every single night.
We had bunk beds and I slept on the bottom. One night I wake to a warm liquid splashing on my face before realizing he was puking off the side of his bed, all over me, all over my bed. Bright red jungle juice puke, smelled like death.
He had been working as a sober driver earlier that night
Posted by reddman
Member since Jul 2005
78186 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 9:37 am to
One day during football season, my roommate got up early on a Saturday to make breakfast for his girlfriend, who was in from out of town. I'm in the living room watching Gameday, and I start to hear commotion and frustration coming from the kitchen. I walk into the kitchen and ask him what the problem is. He says "I can't get this can of biscuits open."

This motherfricker was trying to open a can of biscuits with a can opener. He's now a chemical engineer professor at a major university.
Posted by LuckyTiger
Someone's Alter
Member since Dec 2008
45160 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 12:19 pm to
quote:

My roommate would walk around naked and spin his dick in my face. One day I got tired of him doing this so I grabbed his dick and said, "If you don't stop, I'm going to bite it off!"



Posted by boxcarbarney
Above all things, be a man
Member since Jul 2007
22700 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 1:27 pm to
Back when LSU had the Reggie phone registration system, we'd have to spend a full day dialing, hang up, dial, hang up, dial until the line would ring.

I had a family emergency on registration day, so I asked my roommate if he could register my classes after he did his.

"Sure, man. You go take care of your family. I'll get you the classes you need." So I handed him the info, and headed back to Kenner (brah.)

The next day, he assured me that he got all my classes, and to not worry about a thing.

When I got my schedule for the next semester, the mother fricker had signed me up for Mandarin Chinese, Women's Studies, and some sort of pottery class. I had to scramble to get the classes a actually needed for that semester.
Posted by Black n Gold
Member since Feb 2009
15407 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 1:38 pm to
Another one of my roommates brought some chick from the bar back to our apartment. She ended up shitting on him while she rode cowgirl. Had to walk through a living room full of guys playing Madden.
Posted by Bottom9
Arsenal Til I Die
Member since Jul 2010
21671 posts
Posted on 9/12/19 at 2:11 pm to
quote:

One summer, my buddy and I had a girl move into the vacant bedroom in the house we were renting


Is she hot?
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