re: Funny College Roommate Stories?

One time I came home early from class and my roommate was sitting on a leather recliner butt naked with a big bowl of jello upside down on his lap. I was like WTF are you doing? He said he was hot and he was hungry. It was cold as shite outside and there wasn't a spoon in sight.

Living on Alvin Dark in the late 80’s, in one of the houses near Brightside. During the spring, there would be a ton of co-ed’s jogging around the block of Alvin Dark, Brightside, Nickelson, Pettit. I’m standing in the door way, watching a group of 5 or 6 “Quad Hot on a Tuesday” co-eds jog by. My room mate sneaks up behind and “pants” me (and the underwear).
I was just sorry I was VERY disappointing to them

My roommate pissed me off once, so I rubbed my dick on his pillow while he was at class

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Similar story. One summer, my buddy and I had a girl move into the vacant bedroom in the house we were renting. She was also a good friend, so it wasn't completely awkward or anything from a porn movie. But she was very OCD on being on a schedule. Like she did the same thing, at the same time almost every day. So we'd frick with her to get her off schedule. She'd do a load of laundry(we were fancy and had our own washer and dryer)every night at the same time. So we started putting in a load 10 minutes before we knew she'd go to do it. She would flip out. She ate a bowl of Grape Nuts every morning at the same time. We moved the box of Grape Nuts every night before we went to bed so she'd have to search the house for it. She was too nice to wake us up I guess. Somehow she's still good friends with us after that summer of torment for her.

I walked in my house one day to a thick smell of sour tuna. I found my roommate cooking already cooked canned tuna on the stove because "he wanted to cook the juice out". I went off on him and asked how much more challenging it would have been to dump the juice out in the sink. It smelled for 2 days. Idiot

my buddy and I decided to live together in the engineering dorm at lsu. we get set up and it has us rooming together on the 3rd floor

we decide to use my buddy's recent back surgery as an excuse to get moved to the first floor. he puts in the request with no issues. several weeks later I get a message from a guy (lets call him Bill) that says "sup roommate?" I was like wtf and pulled up the dorm website. sure enough, it shows me with Bill on the 3rd floor, and my buddy with someone else (lets call him Stephen) on the 1st floor. long story short, we cancelled the room change request and got put back together on 3rd floor, while Bill and Stephen were on the 1st floor

turns out the Stephen has some Stephen Hawking-like physical disability. he walked funny and his legs were locked in place like he was skiing or something - half squat with his knees together. he rode around campus on a segway-type thing and was recognized for it.

I ended up meeting Bill a few times and he was a good guy, think he was Kappa Sig. Turned out Stephen was a huge prick - super rude, never took showers, never cleaned..total slob. Bill always cursed me in jest but he probably really meant it What a long, shitty year for that poor bastard. My buddy narrowly dodged a bullet from that Stephen Hawking mf

quote:

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He got up and pissed in the shower instead of the toilet and didn't bother to clean it up or at least rinse it down the drain.

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I do that because it is a Thursday

My roommate was on the phone with his over possessive gf telling her how he was going to stay low key that night and study. She should have detected his bs then being as he never studied and got terrible grades. Hangs up the phone, tells me we're going out, and proceeds to start drinking. Get home at 3:00 AM all shitty. He retires to his room where he starts moaning and groaning. Calls up his gf to tell her he is dying. She drives to our apartment and finds him sleeping in a bed of his own vomit. Cleans him and the room up. He wakes up the next afternoon, calls his gf up and tells her how he smoked his test because he studied so well. Dude had no idea what transpired the night before.