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re: Do You/Did You Have a Stepfather growing up?
Posted on 8/20/25 at 8:23 pm to SaintlyTiger88
Posted on 8/20/25 at 8:23 pm to SaintlyTiger88
Luckily never had to.
I always wonder how it would be to have step kids… I think it would be hard to treat them the same as my kids. Idk… not in purpose, but …idk
Props to those that do it the right way
I always wonder how it would be to have step kids… I think it would be hard to treat them the same as my kids. Idk… not in purpose, but …idk
Props to those that do it the right way
0
Posted on 8/20/25 at 8:32 pm to SaintlyTiger88
quote:
Do You/Did You Have a Stepfather growing up?
Nope, but my younger sibs did. I was out of the house when my mom got remarried.
Divorce is arguably the most destructive force in a child’s life that can ever happen, and adding a step parent in the mix is usually the only thing that can make matters worse.
It is rare where a step parent improves the situation, but it happens. Most of the time, when the couple has their own child, the step parent treats the step kid in a less loving manner than the bio kid.
In my case, he was a lazy pos, but he didn’t physically or verbally abuse anyone to my knowledge. My dad threatened to kill him if he ever heard of a hand being laid on his kids, and he would have done it and the guy knew it.
Mom finally had enough of him pretending to work with his intermittent catering gigs and kicked him to the curb.
Posted on 8/20/25 at 8:52 pm to SaintlyTiger88
Yes and I should have fricking murdered him. He is very very fortunate my father died of a heart attack or he would have definitely had him killed
Posted on 8/20/25 at 9:10 pm to SaintlyTiger88
Yes he was mentally and physically abusive, and got away with it because he was a retired cop. Was a great day that fricker died
Posted on 8/20/25 at 9:33 pm to Masterag
"Divorce is arguably the most destructive force in a child’s life that can ever happen, and adding a step parent in the mix is usually the only thing that can make matters worse."
Sadly, this was my experience too. I've adjusted and done well for myself. But my childhood nearly caused my ruin.
Sadly, this was my experience too. I've adjusted and done well for myself. But my childhood nearly caused my ruin.
Posted on 8/20/25 at 9:39 pm to Grebe
quote:
Sadly, this was my experience too. I've adjusted and done well for myself. But my childhood nearly caused my ruin.
Yeah, I understand. Parents never had to endure it, so they couldn't have possibly fathomed what they did to us.
Even 30 years later, I still feel like I don't have a home except for the one my wife and I have. When she goes home, we go to her parents and all have dinner together, and it's great having everybody in one place. When I go home, we have to coordinate staying with my Mom and Dad separately, and everything still feels wrong to this day.
Posted on 8/20/25 at 9:45 pm to Masterag
I understand that. I feel blessed in my situation. .
I came into my step daughters life when she was 3 and feel like I have done a decent enough job to make her piece of shite dad step it the frick up and be a better dad to her. And he's done it. So better late than never.
I came into my step daughters life when she was 3 and feel like I have done a decent enough job to make her piece of shite dad step it the frick up and be a better dad to her. And he's done it. So better late than never.
Posted on 8/20/25 at 9:52 pm to SallysHuman
quote:
I had a couple. I wasn't treated well. Blended family is something I'm happy to have avoided for my own children.
Same here
Posted on 8/20/25 at 10:07 pm to SaintlyTiger88
Had 4
A - beat up my mom and she eventually dated him again. I don't remember anything negative. He was just there for my mom, not me.
B - Police officer in Florida...He ignored me for the most part which was fine.
C - Was a drug addict...Had a daughter my age that lived with us. She wasn't attractive. He treated me like his own child.
D - Currently still married...Mother married him after I moved out. No relationship. He's a good guy to put up with my mom.
A - beat up my mom and she eventually dated him again. I don't remember anything negative. He was just there for my mom, not me.
B - Police officer in Florida...He ignored me for the most part which was fine.
C - Was a drug addict...Had a daughter my age that lived with us. She wasn't attractive. He treated me like his own child.
D - Currently still married...Mother married him after I moved out. No relationship. He's a good guy to put up with my mom.
This post was edited on 8/20/25 at 10:10 pm
Posted on 8/20/25 at 10:22 pm to SaintlyTiger88
Naw, parents stated married until the first of them died.
Observation:
Good step dads are unfortunately exceptional but the exceptions are exceptional.
Observation:
Good step dads are unfortunately exceptional but the exceptions are exceptional.
Posted on 8/20/25 at 11:32 pm to SaintlyTiger88
Yep. When he was drunk (which was a lot) he was a mean arse drunk. One time he broke a hockey stick over my back for “sassing him”.
Posted on 8/21/25 at 12:09 am to SaintlyTiger88
Yes. He married my mother when my sibs and I were teenagers. Great man. Loved us like we were his own. Died far too young.
My biodad was an abusive a-hole, so I am trying to reprogram my thinking about the two men. If I could get my consciousness to think of my stepdad as my dad, and my dad as a footnote in my life, that would be great. Not there yet, though.
My biodad was an abusive a-hole, so I am trying to reprogram my thinking about the two men. If I could get my consciousness to think of my stepdad as my dad, and my dad as a footnote in my life, that would be great. Not there yet, though.
Posted on 8/21/25 at 7:43 am to SaintlyTiger88
I had one that was a real dipshit when I was a teenager. I couldn't stand him, and apparently neither could my mom, as she left him around the time I graduated high school. She remarried when I was in college and has been with my current step-dad ever since. He's a real good dude, and has to be patient as hell to put up with my mom.
Posted on 8/21/25 at 8:15 am to lowhound
I’ll make it simple. Stepdads are better than stepmoms by a country mile. I could tell you of countless good stepdads, but very few moms. Women are jealous and can’t accept a man loving his other kids / spending time with them.
Posted on 8/21/25 at 8:18 am to SaintlyTiger88
I had a step-father for a few months. He was a piece of shite. My step mom, however has been around for almost 30 years and am closer to her than my mom.
Posted on 8/21/25 at 8:19 am to SaintlyTiger88
Nope, my parents married for life.
Posted on 8/21/25 at 8:23 am to Masterag
quote:
Even 30 years later, I still feel like I don't have a home except for the one my wife and I have. When she goes home, we go to her parents and all have dinner together, and it's great having everybody in one place. When I go home, we have to coordinate staying with my Mom and Dad separately, and everything still feels wrong to this day.
You aren't lying.
Same situation as you. Mine split when I was 7. My wife's family is all still together. I love going visit and getting to have all of them under one roof. I told them when I first met them how jealous I was.
Posted on 8/21/25 at 8:41 am to SaintlyTiger88
My brother had one, and he loved him more than he loved his own dad, who was a total POS.
His real dad called him up a year before he died to tell him he was giving all his money to his other kids. My brother chuckled as he is independently wealthy.
All that said, my brother has a lot of scar tissue from it all. My dad was a hardass, and he gave my bro much discipline, and it sure felt to him like he was being singled out. In reality, the old man knew he was a genius with a mean streak who needed someone to love and hate.
His real dad called him up a year before he died to tell him he was giving all his money to his other kids. My brother chuckled as he is independently wealthy.
All that said, my brother has a lot of scar tissue from it all. My dad was a hardass, and he gave my bro much discipline, and it sure felt to him like he was being singled out. In reality, the old man knew he was a genius with a mean streak who needed someone to love and hate.
Posted on 8/21/25 at 10:31 am to SaintlyTiger88
Mine was a drunken arsehole.
Got in a fight in a bar in Vegas and they torched our 66 Impala.
Couldn't figure out how to change the tube on my bike. Young me thought all men knew how to work on stuff.
Got in a fight with my mom, threw all of her belongings outside on the patio and put her wedding ring down the garbage disposal.
Mom woke me up in the middle of the night. She had loaded all of our stuff into her 66 Mustang while he was asleep and we left that piece of shite. I was in first grade.
Frick that arsehole.
Got in a fight in a bar in Vegas and they torched our 66 Impala.
Couldn't figure out how to change the tube on my bike. Young me thought all men knew how to work on stuff.
Got in a fight with my mom, threw all of her belongings outside on the patio and put her wedding ring down the garbage disposal.
Mom woke me up in the middle of the night. She had loaded all of our stuff into her 66 Mustang while he was asleep and we left that piece of shite. I was in first grade.
Frick that arsehole.
Posted on 8/21/25 at 10:40 am to hogminer
quote:
I had 3 of them. My current stepfather of the last 34 years is a good man. I was 23 when he came on the scene. The other 2 were shitheads. My Mom is hard to live with though.
Same story
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