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Started By
Message
re: Bitch about family thray
Posted on 11/22/18 at 11:43 am to td01241
Posted on 11/22/18 at 11:43 am to td01241
quote:
Your siblings can’t drive?
They are 30 and 32 and mentally challenged. They can't drive nor ever live on their own. They currently live with my parents. My brother's disability is more severe, he is at a second grade reading level, has speech impediments and mentally is like a 10-12 year old. He gets social security disability and can only work 20 hours a week as a bag boy/janitor at a Neighborhood Walmart grocery store(he can only work so many hours a month or he loses his SSI money).
My mom is also a little slow as well, she just doesn't always grasp how the real world works at times. Never learned how to drive and basically relied on my Dad for everything since they married. We are working on her possibly learning to drive but not sure how that will pan out. She is studying the driving manual now and then will need to take a test to get her driver's permit and then we can sign her up for a private driving school. Learning to drive at 65 might be too much for her....but we can at least try it.
They live 35 minutes away from me...so not really feasible to drive them. But there is dial a ride that they can call and arrange. Basically a bus system...that will pick you up and drop you off exactly where you want. But it's $5 a ride ($2 for my mom cause of age). But it doesn't run super late and my sister and brother get off at like 9 and 11 pm most nights. So they call me when they get off and I set up Uber for them on my phone. My sister has a smart phone but don't know if she can navigate Uber app. My little brother doesn't talk much so he just has a trac flip phone they load minutes on.
My dad was driving less than two weeks ago. His anxiety has gripped him so bad right now he says he is dizzy and weak all the time. You can't really rationalize with him right now, everything feels like the end of the world to him. I'm hoping new meds will start kicking in soon and he can feel better and start driving them back/forth to work soon. He tends to overexaggerate his symptoms for attention so it is hard to know how he is really feeling. But if he really is dizzy....I would feel horrible making him drive and he gets in an accident.
ETA: Sorry for long post. I'm just venting I guess.
This post was edited on 11/22/18 at 11:49 am
9
Posted on 11/22/18 at 11:50 am to lsunurse
Hopefully your family is thankful to have a rock like you holding it all together.
Posted on 11/22/18 at 11:52 am to OWLFAN86
I have a beer in my hand and a turkey in the fryer. I don’t give a frick about anything.
Posted on 11/22/18 at 11:56 am to deeprig9
Thanks, I don't feel like a rock most times. It is really stressful at times to me. I know I've ramped up my bitchy level on the board lately and I'm sorry....that's just my outlet I guess. It is hard to stay positive and not just turn bitter and angry about the whole situation.
I have to remind myself I'm not responsible for my father's mental illness. I can't fix him. But at the same time...because I moved them here, I feel responsible to make sure they are ok. It is a lot on my shoulders and it sucks, but it is what it is. Doesn't help that I'm also under a lot of stress with infertility stuff. Having to have surgeries, waiting for when I'm finally cleared to start IVF.
I have to remind myself I'm not responsible for my father's mental illness. I can't fix him. But at the same time...because I moved them here, I feel responsible to make sure they are ok. It is a lot on my shoulders and it sucks, but it is what it is. Doesn't help that I'm also under a lot of stress with infertility stuff. Having to have surgeries, waiting for when I'm finally cleared to start IVF.
Posted on 11/22/18 at 11:58 am to TigerStripes06
Just here to say my sister-in-law is a count.
Posted on 11/22/18 at 12:10 pm to OWLFAN86
My 250 lb SIL has been continuously sliding god awful farts that she apparently thinks no one can smell.
Posted on 11/22/18 at 12:16 pm to Dick Jacket
We'll have a house full. Wife, 3 children, their spouses and the 9 grandchildren. I just hang out, stay out of the traffic, listen to the sounds of life and hoping the Annual Clogged Sewer Line fails to materialize
Oh, a lot of eating, napping, Saints and LSU
Oh, a lot of eating, napping, Saints and LSU
Posted on 11/22/18 at 12:17 pm to lsunurse
quote:you are loved here,
lsunurse
at least by me and lets be real thats all that matters
Posted on 11/22/18 at 12:17 pm to lsunurse
God bless you. Makes my heart ache. Must be quite the loved one.
Posted on 11/22/18 at 12:19 pm to lsunurse
quote:
lsunurse
FYI nurse your family members can deduct from their SSI earnings their transportation costs and anything else ‘work related’ so even things like medicine and eye glasses that you use daily with or without work. They can then earn more.
My guess is he is probably working to his maximum ability before he gets to the $1180 a month maximum anyway, but there are actually quite a few methods to earn more and maintain Medicaid/ SSI benefits.
Posted on 11/22/18 at 12:23 pm to BlackCoffeeKid
quote:
Just here to say my sister-in-law is a count.
I've got one of those. Oh yeah she's also a super lib teacher and her kids worship at the Kardashian alter.
Good times await.
Posted on 11/22/18 at 12:24 pm to OWLFAN86
We had to celebrate our Thanksgiving Tuesday evening because that is the only time that we could all get together. Me and my wife, 3 children and their spouse's and 5 grandchildren. One friend who brought her 2 children. We had a great time. Left out the alcohol other than a dinner wine. No talk of politics. No drama, not one word of anger. We had to cut things to just our immediate family to avoid the drama. Larger gatherings always lead to unwanted talk and attitudes. 
Posted on 11/22/18 at 12:24 pm to OWLFAN86
My GF and I both lied to our families. So it is just us..I wanted to see my sister but she and the BIL wanted to stay in BR.
Posted on 11/22/18 at 12:27 pm to Wheaux
quote:Nor is mine, they're way too rigid to be trashy
My family isn't trashy. Sorry.
my mother is literally insane and the meanest person on the planet
and the turkey is baked not fried
Posted on 11/22/18 at 12:50 pm to OWLFAN86
This is the best thanksgiving I have had in sometime!!
Posted on 11/22/18 at 12:54 pm to baldona
Thanks for the info. That is good to know for future reference. His work is a only a mile from where they live. So he could always ride a bike in the future(he has a bike)...would just have to have his schedule changed so he isn’t getting off when it’s dark. People may hate on walmart... but they are pretty good at working with people like my brother. He has a set schedule and never works more than 20 hrs a week.
I realize my dad isn’t gonna always be around or may get to where he cannot drive permanently anymore. So it is in the back of my head to think of when that day comes and how they will manage without him.
I realize my dad isn’t gonna always be around or may get to where he cannot drive permanently anymore. So it is in the back of my head to think of when that day comes and how they will manage without him.
This post was edited on 11/22/18 at 12:56 pm
Posted on 11/22/18 at 2:46 pm to lsunurse
Just here to say nurse is good people. Always has been, way back to high school.
Posted on 11/22/18 at 2:48 pm to OWLFAN86
Drink cups at our get together.
Nuff said.
Nuff said.
This post was edited on 11/22/18 at 3:00 pm
Posted on 11/22/18 at 2:57 pm to LSUengr
Awwwww, thank you! 
Posted on 11/22/18 at 3:57 pm to lsunurse
quote:
They are 30 and 32 and mentally challenged. They can't drive nor ever live on their own. They currently live with my parents. My brother's disability is more severe, he is at a second grade reading level, has speech impediments and mentally is like a 10-12 year old. He gets social security disability and can only work 20 hours a week as a bag boy/janitor at a Neighborhood Walmart grocery store(he can only work so many hours a month or he loses his SSI money).
My mom is also a little slow as well, she just doesn't always grasp how the real world works at times. Never learned how to drive and basically relied on my Dad for everything since they married. We are working on her possibly learning to drive but not sure how that will pan out. She is studying the driving manual now and then will need to take a test to get her driver's permit and then we can sign her up for a private driving school. Learning to drive at 65 might be too much for her....but we can at least try it.
They live 35 minutes away from me...so not really feasible to drive them. But there is dial a ride that they can call and arrange. Basically a bus system...that will pick you up and drop you off exactly where you want. But it's $5 a ride ($2 for my mom cause of age). But it doesn't run super late and my sister and brother get off at like 9 and 11 pm most nights. So they call me when they get off and I set up Uber for them on my phone. My sister has a smart phone but don't know if she can navigate Uber app. My little brother doesn't talk much so he just has a trac flip phone they load minutes on.
My dad was driving less than two weeks ago. His anxiety has gripped him so bad right now he says he is dizzy and weak all the time. You can't really rationalize with him right now, everything feels like the end of the world to him. I'm hoping new meds will start kicking in soon and he can feel better and start driving them back/forth to work soon. He tends to overexaggerate his symptoms for attention so it is hard to know how he is really feeling. But if he really is dizzy....I would feel horrible making him drive and he gets in an accident.
Its stories like this that ground me and make me realize not only am I blessed, but oblivious to real hardships in the world.
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