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Started By
Message
re: Another casualty of the opiate epidemic
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:19 pm to 420centraltime
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:19 pm to 420centraltime
WWJD?
0
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:20 pm to Spankum
quote:
was that you that posted about this a couple of years ago? seems like you posted here the night before you went away....
Yeah, that was me.
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:20 pm to Hangit
shite man I would love to do something like that.
I would hate to already shatter her fragile mind and she kill herself over it.
I would hate to already shatter her fragile mind and she kill herself over it.
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:21 pm to Ponchy Tiger
quote:
Look I am sorry this is happening to you, I really am. But in regards to her, I couldn’t care any less. I don’t wish anything bad on her but I don’t feel sorry for her. This whole opioid epidemic is bull shite. This is self inflicted. I don’t care if something bad happened to her it’s still her fault she got on this shite. These ppl need to accept personal responsibility for their actions of getting hook this and quit blaming some traumatic event in their lives. Bad she happens that is life, deal with it. I know I sound harsh but man I have seen this first hand. It never ends well when you try to help them. They need to want to get better for them not for wanting to be with someone else.
What he said
Been down this road with an ex-GF. She lost great jobs, lied her arse off about everything and wound up f-ing around with a guy that she started getting her dope from.
Wish her well and move the frick on. Life is too short to waste on people who are looking for any BS excuse to dope up to deal with "lifes problems". Too many good women out there to waste time with that crap.
FTR, I finally dumped the dope-head and wound up with a great woman who is smarter, hotter and makes tremendously better life-decisions than the former quack.
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:21 pm to 420centraltime
You're on the right path but I have this weird thing about thinking most people are capable of redemption. Have to be cautiously optimistic (at some point) and remember words are meaningless, actions are what matter.
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:24 pm to 420centraltime
I feel it's cruel to drop her when she gets out of rehab. She could feel like she is being abandoned and relapse from depression. Don't stick with her though if she doesn't straighten up.
Just be tough on her. Make it clear she has to stay clean because if she does it again then you're gone for good.
Just be tough on her. Make it clear she has to stay clean because if she does it again then you're gone for good.
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:27 pm to 420centraltime
quote:
Alabama Fan
quote:
abusing opiates
Checks out.
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:28 pm to 420centraltime
If you take her back before she gets help it will continue to be the same thing over and over. She is going to need money to feed her addiction.
I have a cousin who is an addict. She was married, had a kid and now she is divorced and her ex has custody of the kid.
She was handling the money and her husband had no idea what was going on until he had to get something fixed on his truck and went to pay for it and eventually learned there was no money in their account.. And he got paid the day before.
She went to rehab and is now doing some type of out side rehab thing where she meets up with others who are trying to get clean (I guess it's like AA) and she has been working at the same job for about a year so she seems to be getting things in order, but before that she couldn't keep a job. She got fired for stealing money at several jobs.
One time the day she started a new job she got stopped by the police for speeding or something and her name came up when they ran her license (evidently she had a warrant or something) and she had like $500 and the place she started working at that day just so happened to be missing $500, but her stealing and trying to constantly get money was an ongoing thing.
Her brother is my age, we are pretty close. She had given him her bat bag for his daughters when they started playing softball. One night she showed up at his house telling him she needed the bag back (she had given it to him 5 or 6 years earlier). She told him she was helping coach a team and wanted to use it. The next day she had it up on FB trying to sell it.
If you want to continuously live with that shite then take her back, but you might actually be doing her a favor by not taking her back (well, it could make her realize she really needs to get help).
I have a cousin who is an addict. She was married, had a kid and now she is divorced and her ex has custody of the kid.
She was handling the money and her husband had no idea what was going on until he had to get something fixed on his truck and went to pay for it and eventually learned there was no money in their account.. And he got paid the day before.
She went to rehab and is now doing some type of out side rehab thing where she meets up with others who are trying to get clean (I guess it's like AA) and she has been working at the same job for about a year so she seems to be getting things in order, but before that she couldn't keep a job. She got fired for stealing money at several jobs.
One time the day she started a new job she got stopped by the police for speeding or something and her name came up when they ran her license (evidently she had a warrant or something) and she had like $500 and the place she started working at that day just so happened to be missing $500, but her stealing and trying to constantly get money was an ongoing thing.
Her brother is my age, we are pretty close. She had given him her bat bag for his daughters when they started playing softball. One night she showed up at his house telling him she needed the bag back (she had given it to him 5 or 6 years earlier). She told him she was helping coach a team and wanted to use it. The next day she had it up on FB trying to sell it.
If you want to continuously live with that shite then take her back, but you might actually be doing her a favor by not taking her back (well, it could make her realize she really needs to get help).
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:29 pm to 420centraltime
You know what to do. Do it. You are doing it for her good as well as protecting yourself. This will only end up one way if you don't and you know it.
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:30 pm to 420centraltime
quote:
I don't disagree, man. I want to give her the benefit of the doubt, but to kick me when I'm down like that and the extent she went to cover her tracks just cuts me deep.
I've been close to that ledge many times and I've been able to avoid the rabbit hole. I really wish I could help her and be compassionate, but I don't think I can forgive her for what she's done.
You realize that you would have to give up all drugs and alcohol and live a completely sober life if you decided to stay with her, right?
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:30 pm to deltaland
quote:
She could feel like she is being abandoned
She lost that privilege when she stole from him & pawned jewelry. He is under no obligation to be her support system, nor stay so she doesn’t feel abandoned. That’s codependency.
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:31 pm to 420centraltime
quote:
I know what needs to be done
Clearly not, as I don't see any pics in the thread.
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:33 pm to 420centraltime
quote:
800$
What is this nonsense?
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:36 pm to Python
Yeah, before the crackdown, that would get you about 160 vic 10s. That will last about a month for someone that's truly addicted.
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:36 pm to 420centraltime
If she's going to get clean she needs to cut you off and all old friends except family for a while.
She may need to move away. What she was doing wasn't working.
The money can be replaced.
She may need to move away. What she was doing wasn't working.
The money can be replaced.
This post was edited on 3/28/18 at 9:38 pm
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:39 pm to 420centraltime
You need to show some tough love and tell her she needs to get better before you take her back. You and her also need to understand that it will take at least a year. That gives you both time to sort the problems and the new world out. It’s not easy buts it the only way it will work. Let her go if you ever want her back. Also, don’t think you will be able to keep drinking or anything else around her either. It’s a partnership with another person. If you can’t at least do that, you definitely need to let her go and seek a new direction.
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:40 pm to Nado Jenkins83
quote:
Does she give head?
Well he said they're not yet married. So yes, she probably gives head.
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:41 pm to 420centraltime
I'm sorry this happened. I will offer the following:
It is possible that she will get sober, never use again and be a better person than she has ever been. Particularly if she deals with that previous trauma.
Pay attention to what she is saying when she talks to you. People who are really getting something out of treatment love it. They are very positive about their experiences. If she is downing the program and complaining about them mistreating her or making excuses to leave early it is a sign that she isn't fully invested in treatment, which makes her chances of relapsing astronomically high. It's all about her attitude.
Your decision is a tough one. You weren't together for that long because she sucks at relationships. There was obviously something good about her before this happened. You have to decide if the potential future with her is worth the risk knowing that she could relapse. Can you forgive her? Will you ever trust her again? If you stay with her do you feel like you will have to keep watch over her? Is this what you want for the rest of your life?
It is possible that she will get sober, never use again and be a better person than she has ever been. Particularly if she deals with that previous trauma.
Pay attention to what she is saying when she talks to you. People who are really getting something out of treatment love it. They are very positive about their experiences. If she is downing the program and complaining about them mistreating her or making excuses to leave early it is a sign that she isn't fully invested in treatment, which makes her chances of relapsing astronomically high. It's all about her attitude.
Your decision is a tough one. You weren't together for that long because she sucks at relationships. There was obviously something good about her before this happened. You have to decide if the potential future with her is worth the risk knowing that she could relapse. Can you forgive her? Will you ever trust her again? If you stay with her do you feel like you will have to keep watch over her? Is this what you want for the rest of your life?
This post was edited on 3/28/18 at 9:42 pm
Posted on 3/28/18 at 9:42 pm to 420centraltime
quote:
I would hate to already shatter her fragile mind and she kill herself over it.
Was she fragile when she boarded your family's business like a pirate, with a cutlass in her teeth?
Was she fragile when she was whoring her self out for drugs?
Did she care about you at all when she traded gifts that you worked your arse of to get for her? Or did she say "frick him, I'm finna get high." You and your family were easily disposable to her.
If you are not mercenary enough to get your money back from this thieving whore, at least get a judgement against her and have her arrested for the stealing.
Going to rehab does not make her victims whole again.
When someone shows you who they really are, believe them.
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