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Started By
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re: I miss Norm Macdonald doing news on Saturday Night Live
Posted on 4/15/21 at 9:42 am to Byrdybyrd05
Posted on 4/15/21 at 9:42 am to Byrdybyrd05
Consider this joke, which Norm actually told live on air on NBC:
"In Nebraska, a man was sentenced for killing a female crossdresser who had accused him of rape and two of her friends. Excuse me if this sounds harsh, but in my mind, they all deserved to die."
Brutal. Savage. Norm's dry delivery made it all the funnier. I've rarely felt worse for laughing so much.
"In Nebraska, a man was sentenced for killing a female crossdresser who had accused him of rape and two of her friends. Excuse me if this sounds harsh, but in my mind, they all deserved to die."
Brutal. Savage. Norm's dry delivery made it all the funnier. I've rarely felt worse for laughing so much.
1
Posted on 4/15/21 at 10:48 am to Hoodie
quote:
"In Nebraska, a man was sentenced for killing a female crossdresser who had accused him of rape and two of her friends. Excuse me if this sounds harsh, but in my mind, they all deserved to die."
Posted on 4/15/21 at 11:00 am to Byrdybyrd05
You must listen to shat the movie podcast ????
Posted on 4/15/21 at 11:05 am to Cregg
quote:
"In Nebraska, a man was sentenced for killing a female crossdresser who had accused him of rape and two of her friends. Excuse me if this sounds harsh, but in my mind, they all deserved to die."
He’d be fired on the spot and wouldn’t be allowed to continue Update if he said that one today.
Posted on 4/15/21 at 11:15 am to OMLandshark
I met Norm one time at the bar I worked at. He did a set a block away and wanted to grab some Red Bull’s to take back to his room to watch the masters. The guy loves the masters something fierce. We ended up talking for a bit as it was really early in the morning at the time. It was near my birthday and I considered the time spent my sort of cosmic birthday gift.
Posted on 4/15/21 at 11:19 am to OMLandshark
quote:
The nation is still reeling Thursday’s bombshell announcement that Lisa Marie Presley has filed for divorce from Michael Jackson. According to friends the two were never a good match. She’s more the stay at home type while he’s more of a homosexual pedophile.
This is going to botched but I cannot find the exact quote
Michael Jackson and Lisa Marie persley got married yesterday. persley had sweet words for their vows. Michael’s imagination is what inspires me. like his ability to imagine I am a 11 year old boy
Posted on 4/15/21 at 11:19 am to Byrdybyrd05
How have we not mentioned this one yet?
quote:
In his book, O.J. Simpson says he would have taken a bullet or stood in front of a train for Nicole....Man, I’m gonna tell ya, that is some bad luck when the one guy who would’ve died for you...kills you.
This post was edited on 4/15/21 at 11:21 am
Posted on 4/15/21 at 11:22 am to Byrdybyrd05
Norm is a national treasure.
Posted on 4/15/21 at 11:32 am to OMLandshark
Obligatory pic in response to your link.
Posted on 4/15/21 at 11:39 am to TheFonz
Here are a few more of my favorites:
quote:
Standing outside a New York City courtroom this week, Paula Jones was berated by passing New Yorkers who called her names such as “slut” and “whore.” Observers say the situation grew even worse when the crowd realized who she was.
quote:
This weekend OJ Simpson was caught at the airport by reporters who asked why he wasn’t spending Mother’s Day with his children. The visibly annoyed Simpson said “Idiot, I didn’t spend Mother’s Day with my kids because I killed their mother!”
quote:
At the White House this week President Clinton officially came out against same sex marriage. What’s more the President said he’s not too crazy about opposite sex marriages either.
quote:
And in music news, number one on the college charts this summer was Better Than Ezra. And at number two? Ezra.
quote:
Our top story tonight: In Los Angeles this week, Lyle and Eric Menendez were found guilty of first-degree murder. So, to review California law: killing your wife - legal; killing your parents - illegal.
quote:
Tomorrow night on 60 Minutes, Dr. Jack Kevorkian will sit for his first-ever in-depth interview. According to producers, Kevorkian agreed to the interview only on condition that it be conducted by veteran correspondent Andy Rooney. Wait! Don't do it, Andy, it's a trap! It's a trap!
quote:
According to a new ordinance in Kansas City, Missouri, anyone convicted of indecent exposure, prostitution, or soliciting prostitution will have his name posted on a local cable channel. If I can be permitted a personal comment, while the plan's goal of publicly shaming sex offenders is well intentioned, it's important to remember, in this democracy of ours, that Norm MacDonald is a very common name.
This post was edited on 4/16/21 at 9:36 pm
Posted on 4/15/21 at 11:43 am to OMLandshark
And this one needs its separate post. Norm almost got fired for this one in the dress rehearsal, the crowd severely booed Norm, and didn’t make it live on the air but it may be his best one:
In other news, Woody Allen is dating again!
In other news, Woody Allen is dating again!
Posted on 4/15/21 at 11:49 am to OMLandshark
Posted on 4/15/21 at 11:53 am to OMLandshark
quote:
In other news, Woody Allen is dating again!
WOW.
Posted on 4/15/21 at 12:00 pm to OMLandshark
"This past weekend marked the 7,000th performance of the Broadway musical, "Cats." It also marked the 7,000th time a man turned to his wife in the audience and asked, "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?!"
Posted on 4/15/21 at 12:05 pm to OMLandshark
quote:
Greatest talk show interview of all time: Do something with that, you freak!
Norm: *Challenge Accepted*
God I loved watching him do bits. SNL, interviews, all of it.
Posted on 4/15/21 at 12:17 pm to Byrdybyrd05
Norm interrupting others during talk show interviews
I swear, the man was just plain hilarious with the shite he came up with on the spot.
I think he was legit enamored with Keke Palmer.
She was legit funny on her own too.
I swear, the man was just plain hilarious with the shite he came up with on the spot.
I think he was legit enamored with Keke Palmer.
She was legit funny on her own too.
Posted on 4/15/21 at 12:19 pm to skrayper
I remember seeing an interview of his on a talk show where he discussed being hired by a huge fair somewhere in the Midwest. Turns out it was a lot of church-going folk who were totally appalled at his sense of humor.
He was like, "have you ever watched me before"?
He was like, "have you ever watched me before"?
Posted on 4/15/21 at 1:05 pm to Byrdybyrd05
Norm McDonald by himself would be infinitely more entertaining than any of the SNL lineups in the last decade.
Posted on 4/15/21 at 7:02 pm to Kafka
quote:
"Name one person funnier than Sarah Silverman. Besides men."
I died laughing when I heard this.
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